Sproose up Your Life

With most search engines, it's difficult to determine the formulas they utilize to rank websites. When you enter a keyword, the results may not be relevant to your needs, which is often frustrating. There are new social search engines arising that will help customize Internet research to the users. This is accomplished by having members rank websites from 1 to 5, which in turn will immediately raise or lower a website's standing. Each website will have a group ranking and a personalized ranking. When you visit the Sproose home page, the directions and a more detailed explanation. To me, it just makes sense. Let the people decide rather than the computers!

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This post is sponsored.

Bewitched

Last night I dreamt that a few friends (looking at you T, and H was there too) and I were witches. Not the scary ones with warts and pointy hats, but more normal looking people with super powers. Like the girls in Charmed, but without Shannon Daughtery's attitude. If we were facing a crowd of people and needed to get through, no problem, we would just make them fall asleep, and the way was cleared. We tried to do this in one room though, and lo and behold, there was another witch there too. She was trying to make my arms levitate, but I held her off, and then she knew we were witches too. Apparently, this wasn't good, because I prepared the other girls for a fight. We all scattered, but then managed to round the bad witch up. Suddenly, a chiropractor appeared and he had her on the ground ready to snap her neck (and not in a good way). He went into detail about it, then crack, it was done and she was dead. That's when I woke up.

It was pretty cool. Well, the super powers part, not necessarily the killing of other witches part.

Make me a Happy Person

Due to Larry's recent kidney scare, Christmas really snuck up on me. Since Peyton was born, I always send out photo holiday cards, so that everyone can see how much they have grown, and I didn't want this year to be any different. I picked a night to take the boys photos and just went with it. Apparently, my camera does not know what to do with a set of crazy boys.

Example A:

Beware! The blurs will get you!

Example B:

Apparently, my youngest became a ghost while I wasn't looking!

What is a mother to do?!? Finally, I set the timer, threatened the oldest with his life to sit still, and held the youngest in place until the timer flickered, then tickled them both before the camera went off. The end result was two photos, photoshopped together.



While the kids look cute, the photos are oh, so red. What I wouldn't give for a new digital camera!! When I ordered the photos, they arrived even redder. With a new camera and printer, who knows, I could be the next, um, well, some famous photographer! Being bestowed with a new HP camera and printer would make me one Happy Person!

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This post is sponsored by HP.

Lend me Your Ear

Since Peyton was about, oh, nine weeks old, he has been an ear baby. Not necessarily his own ear either, but whomever was around and he could reach. At 6 months, this was adorable and made the lucky ear feel loved. At 18 months, it was still cute, and grandparents happily lend their ear for the taking. At 30 months, the ear holding was still ok, most of the time. At 42 months, it was getting a little old, but we figured it would end any day now. Now, at 55 months, that's roughly 4.5 years, I am tired of the ear holding. It has diminished a great deal, and now the quick ear check generally occurs as a means of affection, or when Peyton climbs in our bed at 2:30 in the morning. A brief, hey, your ear is still there. However slight, it's still annoying. A four year old's hands are generally dirty no matter how much you clean them, and Peyton's are always hot.

The mommy part of me feels bad for wanting the ear holding to be vanquished forever. It's probably the last remaining attributes Peyton has carried over from babyhood (except for his loathing of bedtime), and I know when it ends, a part of me will be sad. I think that sad part will miss the babiness the most. The fact that my first born is really growing up will sink in and hit bottom, anchored to my heart.

The adult part of me just wants to say, "keep your grubby hands to yourself!"

Gearing up for a New Year

Now that the holidays are finally over, I have to get myself back on track and start exercising again. I'm planning on starting my Master Cleanse fast next Wednesday or Thursday, and then cutting out refined sugars. I'm going to try and look at this more from a health and fitness aspect rather than just losing weight, although that will be nice too. I think if I can work to incorporate some ways to squeeze exercise into my schedule, I will be successful. I enjoyed walking and training for the 5k, I just need to get back into that mindset again. It's so funny, how when you regularly exercise, you can't imagine not doing it, and now that it's been a couple of months, it's hard to get back in to it. Hopefully, some of these trends will help me in my endevour.

I can tell such a difference in my overall attitude when I'm not taking care of myself. I feel so blah and tired. Also, my clothes are getting tight. EEK! I think Larry's going to jump on the bandwagon with me too. He's talking about getting a watch that will help monitor our heartrates and mileage, so we can train more effeciently.

Here's to a Happy and Healthy New Year!

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This post was sponsored.

Only 11 and a Half Years to Go

Even though I have a while before my boys start driving, I still worry about how my car insurance rates will soar when they do hit that golden age. I'm sure at that time, I will conduct a lot of searches on cheap auto insurance. Geico advertisements are all over the place, and while browsing on their site, I saw they offer guides for drivers. One of their new ones is titled "Teens and Trucks" which was developed with the American Moving and Storage Association. The brochure offers guidelines for dealing with large trucks while driving, such as staying out of their blind spots and being careful of their wide turns. Ideas that are common sense to seasoned drivers, aren't as clear to those with newfound freedom in their hands.

If I'd Only Known

Peyton was home sick a couple of weeks before Christmas, so that afternoon, we ran to Target to look at toys. He pointed out a few things and helped me pick toys out for Shey. Later, when he wasn't with me, I went back to buy some toys for him from Santa. If only I had known about coupon codes from Couponchief.com, I could have shopped at Target online and saved myself some time and money.

Sometimes it's better to receive

I feel so much better today. It's amazing what giving in to your husband and having an orgasm will do for you. (I can write this now, my mom is on the road here. ha)

Apathetic be my Name

Oh Apathy,
Oh Apathy,
Why hast thou over-
Taken me?

With all the holiday parties and goodies, I am just flat out exhausted. I'm not ready for Christmas to be over yet, but I am ready for the junk food to be gone! I haven't worked out or eaten right in over a month and I can really tell. I just feel blah. Back in July, I completed an 8 day fast using the Master Cleanse and I'm planning on doing another beginning the first week of January. I'm actually looking forward to not eating for a while.

I need a nap.

Finding Love Online

When Larry and I met online almost 10 years ago, we did it the old fashioned way. We started chatting in a chat room, appropriately named Friends First, we met in private chat rooms and sent e-mails after that, then we eventually spoke on the telephone and started visiting each other. Today, though, there are so many options for people who want to try online dating.

One free option available on the web is iamfreetonight.com. They offer a wide variety of unique tools, including a special wingman feature that allows the user to set up double and group dates to keep the pressure of meeting someone new for the first time down.

Meeting someone on the Internet was a great experience for me. Larry and I were able to truly get to know one another and would talk for hours online and on the phone. As with any online dating experience, please use caution and make smart choices when meeting people for the first time.

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This post is sponsored.

Final Diagnosis

Hi Everyone, just wanted to let you know that Larry spoke with his doctor yesterday and they have determined that the cyst on Larry's kidney, while complex, is benign. This means that he needs to touch base with the Urologist in 6 months to make sure he still feels good and then get yearly scans for a few years to monitor this cyst. We are so very blessed that we sought a second opinion and were given this awesome news. Our best Christmas present yet! Thank you so much for all of your prayers. I know they were the miracle that pulled us through this ordeal.

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A word about my sponsored posts. Most of them are through Pay Per Post, a company that offers businesses the opportunity to pay bloggers to advertise on their blogs. The bloggers post their opinions with links to the sites within the post. The pay from $5.00 a post and up. With everything that has been going on, and the medical bills that are starting to come in, I thought I would use this to bring in some extra money. I don't want to bombard the blog with them, so I am trying to post a personal post for each sponsored post. Thanks for reading and if it sounds like something you would be interested in, the link is on my sidebar. :)

Are Credit Cards for You?

If you spend any amount of time on a college campus, sooner or later you will run into a credit card company offering a free gift in exchange for signing up for one of their credit cards. But should you? It seems that so many young adults, especially those from the ages of 18-23, are piling on the credit card debt. Imagine being out of the house for the first time and having someone offer what appears to be free money. "Buy now, and take years to pay it back!" What sounds too good to be true, most often is.

However, should you choose to carry a credit card and use it responsibly, they can come in handy. If you do your research, and remember some credit card advice, you can use credit cards to help you. A professor of mine was also a financial planner and he paid with a credit card for all of his purchases. BUT, he made sure to pay it off at the end of the month, every month, and for the full amount. By doing so, his money stayed in an interest yielding account, while he used the credit card company's money for items during the month. You must be very diligent to do this though.

It also helps to stay abreast of credit card news by using sites specifically dealing with credit cards UK.

My suggestions is that if you apply for a credit card, only get one, and keep your limit low.

Becoming a Soldier

Larry's parents lived in the same house for about 20 years before buying their current residence. Their best friends lived next door and they had a son,Brian, who is 7 years younger than Larry. I met Brian when he was 13. He was thin and wirey, a bit awkward, but sweet. Every time the families get together, they recount the story of how his mother had to chase him around the yard holding beans and rice trying to get him to eat. I've heard this story so many times, I feel as though I was there.

Four years ago, Brian moved up to Orlando to attend school. We would see him when he was home on breaks. It's crazy watching someone grow up while missing months in between. He would leave for a few months, and return 3 inches taller. The wireyness turned into tall and lean. The curly hair was kept short now and dare I say, a six pack had developed that Brian loved to show off. The politeness of his childhood remained though, and he is a dear friend to us, and especially Larry's younger brother.

As Brian neared graduation, he enlisted in the Air Force. He's opting to go through boot camp even though he's not required as he has a degree. He learned that fellow soldiers respect you more for doing so. This is the man he has become.

Brian leaves today for Texas for basic training. He called Larry Sunday night to talk for a few minutes and ask him to watch over Marc (Larry's brother). That's when it really hit home for Larry. We're so very proud of Brian, and for me it's one more reason this nonsensical war should end sooner than later.

If four years of college matured him to this point, I can only imagine what a tour of duty will do for him. I pray without ceasing that he will not be sent away, but if he is, for his safe return. Having two boys, I can't even imagine what his mother is going through now. We love you, Brian.

Getting more for your Money

A couple of years ago, Larry and I had ran up quite a bit of credit card debit, and were spending an incredible amount on monthly payments without the balance going down. Fortunately, the equity of our house had gone up and after making some calculations, we realized that if we took out a home equity loan, we could pay off our credit cards and renovate the kitchen. Our overall monthly payment didn't increase much at all, and we love the new kitchen. With interest rates still being pretty low, if you need the extra money, a home equity loan may be worth checking in to.

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Opinions are mine; however, the post is sponsored.

New Blog to Read

Since I do have a full time job outside of the home, (which is where I do most of my Internet surfing(at work, not home)), I try to restrict myself from searching for new blogs to read as I goof off enough already. However, thanks to Bonnie Wren's "Super Sabado", I find myself skimming through the presented blogs for new finds and gems.

A couple of weeks ago, I found Mental Tesserae and now I am hooked. Thankfully, she only began blogging back in August or so, and as such, catching up on her archives isn't taking me as long as it normally does. Julie has a great way of relating art to her life and a piece of art accompanies most of her entries. Her entries are heartfelt and her way of looking at life is truly extraordinary. I say, check her out! (Wow, I have such a way with words!)

Tired of Acid Reflux?

When I was pregnant, I suffered from horrible acid reflux all the time. I popped Tums like they were going out of style. If only I had known about AcidCalm, a hearburn and acid reflux remedy that is all natural, I would have enjoyed those nine and a half months so much more. I like the idea that there are no harsh chemicals and that they guarantee their product. Even more so, the damage to your body is projected to be reversed within 2 to 5 months. The website is very nicely presented and information is easy to find.

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This post sponsered.

Play Away

Last night, I went with a friend to a surpise women's party* and much fun was had by all. I also discovered pomegranite martinis which are delish!

*For those slow ones out there, think of the phrase, "The only difference between men and boys are the size of their toys." Now replace men and boys with women and girls and throw in a battery operated somewhere.

We had such a grand time that I signed up to host my own. I'm hoping for the end of January, enough time past Christmas, but just in time for Valentine's Day.

There is one thing though that can kill a good time rather quickly, when I arrived home at about 10:00, both boys were still awake, watching TV with their father. Seriously! I very quickly read them a book and spanked them soundly and put them to bed. (ok, I didn't spank them soundly, I saved that for Larry (ok, I didn't even do that.))

Bedtime is really just crappy time at our house. Peyton has NEVER gone to bed easy and Shey, who used to be my dream sleeper, has learned the ways of the older stubborn brother. Last night, though, I was not having it and they both threw fits from their bedrooms. Oh well. I told Larry, if we can't control these children at 2 and 4, what are we going to do later.

I feel a smackdown coming in the K household.

For the Person Who Has Everything

With the Holiday season fast approaching, many of us are left scratching our heads trying to come up with gifts for everyone on our list. What do you get the person who has everything?

What about silver? Monex Deposit Company (MDC) offers silver and other precious metals for sale. There are a couple of different ways you can purchase the silver, which are coin form or a more natural state called ingot (which reminds me of the money in Harry Potter). Monex Deposit Company has been in business for more than 30 years and will shop the metals directly to you or arrange for storage in a safe place, such as a bank.

I know I spend several hours thinking of the perfect gift for my friends and family. With this, I can give a gift that no one already has!

Are you there, God?

A few days ago, Mrs. Kennedy posted an entry about a conversation she had with her son. The gist was Jackson was telling kids at school that he didn’t believe in God and how the kids at school reacted. There were several comments made regarding the post, some from fellow atheists with hearty “right ons” and some from those who believe in God, mostly well meaning and trying to explain their views. I felt compelled to leave a brief comment, but really, what can you say to an aetheist to convince them to believe in a being you can’t see?

The more I’ve thought about the topic, and read Mrs. Kennedy’s reply post, the more I wanted to write my own thoughts down, not so much as an argument, or an explanation, but a “here it is post.”

I’ve always had a strong believe in God that was instilled in me by a mother who faithfully went to church when the doors were open throughout my formative years. I never really felt the need to rebel against the church, even when I didn’t go for all those years. It was still there in my head and I knew I would make my way back when I found a place I felt I belonged. I attended a small private Christian school that imbedded the knowledge of the Bible in my head, but without much historical background to substantiate it like my adult self would have liked.

It wasn’t until Larry took me to church for Mother’s Day that I found that. The pastor was conducting a series on The DiVinci Code, like I’m sure most churches were doing with the movie release. He offered intellectually sound evidence to prove the validity of the Bible and the events that are within it. I only remember a couple off the top of my head. One being the meticulous way the scribes would transcribe the ancient texts passed from generation to generation. That even if one comma was out of place, the parchment was burned. Another being the sheer amounts of pieces that remain from these ancient texts. Just for example (and these aren’t accurate numbers) if there was one copy of a Homer text, there were 100 copies of a biblical text. A third proof contained within the Bible itself are the amount of prophecies (over 300) that were given and fullfilled. Not just broad sweeping statements either, but places, people and events. This valid, not just here it is, believe it, was what I needed as an adult and had been craving. Finally, something to go on besides just faith alone.

Aside from the information I’ve gleaned from my pastor since then, there are my other, more personal reasons for believing in God. These are the thoughts that have been going through my mind since reading Fussy’s post. From what I understand, I guess atheists believe we should be good just for the sake of mankind. That to be kind to others is just how we should act. I have a problem with this. Why? Why, if there are no checks and balances other than those on earth, should we be nice to others? Why should we follow the laws?

Let’s see, I guess one could go to jail. But so what? If when you die, there is nothing, what does it matter? You’ll be gone. If there are no spiritual consequences, does it really make that big of an impact on one’s decision making? I guess people could say that those who treat others poorly will lead a life of solitude and misery, but why should that person care? They are doing what they want to do. Why do we feel this need, this inherent need, to treat others with respect?

There’s also the theory of evolution. If we really evolved from an animal, would this moral issue be within us? What would have given us the ability to feel this way? And why aren’t animals still evolving? Why don’t we see a half ape half man? What is the spark within us that makes us different? How could all of this, all that man has accomplished, just happened?

I think it is the Godliness in us that is the difference. The spirit, the soul, the conscience, whatever you want to call it. There is something inside of mankind that makes us different. Don’t you feel it?

Sure we have our shortcomings, that’s called choice, and we do have one. But there is a driving force that separates us from any other species on the planet. If you sit still and are honest with yourself, in that place deep within you, there is something there. Something that you have to admit is bigger than we are.

I don’t really know what else to say without rambling on, but I just needed to get this out. So there it is. I welcome any comments.

Shout Out

I'm always on the look out for new blogs to read, and I've found a new friend, Colleen. She's fun, because most of her posts are quick blurbs into her life, which is nice when you're browsing 20 or more blogs a day. She also introduced me to Pay Per Post, which explains some of my recent posts. ;)

Colleen also has recently started a Shopping Blog. Her entries showcase deals found on the web, good and bad. Here's a great post on Disney Deals for those of us looking for vacation ideas. This looks pretty cool too for gifts for your spouse, which I will definitely be checking out as Larry is so hard to shop for. She even has a Thumbs Down section, which is nice.

And there we go, another friend made on this World Wide Web.

Riding the River

One of my fondest memories growing up is sitting around me grandmother's kitchen table watching my dad, uncles and grandfather playing poker. The game varied from stud, 21, 7-card, you name it, they played it. Occassionally, I would get to sit in too. It was all in good fun, and we rarely went about a dolloar bet. As I got older and Texas Hold'em became popular, of course I was intriqued. Larry and I play sometimes online. It's always for fun, and always with fake money.

For those a little more serious about their Online Poker, you can go to websites to learn more about the game, the rules and tips. This particular site, which gives a step by step tutorial for Online Poker games, including Texas Hold'em, offers reviews for casinos, free gifts and a myriad of other helpful information. Have fun and play safe!

Behold, The Boy!

For the past several weeks whenever Shey poops, he comes to us, points to his butt and says, "pee pee." So, he's a little backwards, but we understand what he means. I took this as a sign that he may be ready to begin the uphill battle we call potty training. I bought one of the little pottys and put it in the bathroom. He doesn't care to sit on it really, but he will put the top part on the big toilet and sit on it. We've been doing that for a couple nights before their bath.

Last night, he opened the lid, put the toilet ring on there and motioned for me to put him on top. He pointed his little pee pee down, and by God, he peed in the toilet! Much celebration ensued! After his bath, I put him in the diaper like normal and he went to bed.

This morning . . . the diaper was dry. My little man, who will be 2 tomorrow, went to the bathroom, repeated the toilet process and PEED AGAIN! Oh, that would be so, so awesome if he potty trained himself!

By the way, for some reason .blogspot.com has now become denied on my work server, so I can't read any of your blogger blogs. Hell, I can't even read my own! I'm friends with IT, so I'm going to try and get this resolved.

Bring in the Blogs

I've been conducting a lot of research lately on how to make money on the web. From everything I've read, the main key to success is traffic and to get traffic, you have to have linkage love. I found an interesting article on link popularity and how to achieve it. It appears that blogs hold a crucial key to a website's popularity. The more blogs link to a website, the better ratings it receives through the search engines, such as Google. There's a fairly new website, Blogitive, that offers businesses the opportunity to have 1,000's of bloggers spotlight their products, in essence growing their business for them. If you own a business, or a website, and are looking for a way to increase your link popularity, I'd check out this article.

And Justice for All

Last night, Peyton surveyed the Christmas tree, piled with newly wrapped presents and said with great slowness and exaggeration, "Why do I only have two presents, and Shey has a lot of presents?" In the defense of the "Thou Shalt be Fair when Giving Christmas Presents to Siblings Gods," I explained, "well, two of Shey's gifts are for his birthday, and one is actually from Grandmommy, I just bought it for her." He thought this over for a bit and seemed to agree, then he looked at me and said conspiracyly, "Why don't you just tell me what's in my presents?" Not gonna happen buddy, although if he were older and a bit wiser, he would realize the two gifts under the tree are probably the two toys he had pointed out to me in Target earlier. But yah! We are still before the age of guessing gifts.

On the kidney note, Larry finally has his CT scan scheduled for next Wednesday and hopefully this will put an end to the worrying and they can reach a clear decision regarding the structure of this mass on his kidney. Thank you for your continued support and prayers!

Be Careful or the Monkey Will Get You

Apparently, when I don't have to post, I want to post more. Thanks, or not so much, to Bonnie for the following game. Attempt to beat my score, if you DARE. . .

Monkey Game

Fin

If writing everyday for Napoblahblah didn't make me grey, the events from last night sure added a few. Observe:






One kid looks cute, the other, a crazed lunatic.




As you can see, Shey can actually turn himself into a ghost at will!


So, so close, but the damn dog got in the way and I lopped off Peyton's head.


This one's not horrible, but I finally managed to get a good one of Peyton and another good one of Shey and I photoshopped those bitches together. These are only a few of the about 50 I took. I thought I was going to lose a kid in the process.

And ta da, my month of posting is OVER!

The End. It is Nye.

Wouldn't that just suck to make it to the 29th day and just forget to post! Whew, 29 days down, one to go. Then I can resume my normal sporadic crappy posting, rather than my every day crappy posting!

The kids and I put up the Christmas tree last night and we only had 2 casualities. And wouldn't you know it, while in bed, I heard one of the cats already puking up fake pine needles. Damn cats. If anyone knows what I can do to keep my cats from eating fake pine needles and real flower leaves, please leave me a comment. For now, we are shutting them up in the back of the house. I'm going to attempt to take the boys photo tonight for Christmas cards. Hopefully they will cooperate and I won't have to photoshop them too much. I can't believe this year is getting ready to end already. Time flies.

The D-List

Look at me go. ha ha

The weather outside is frightful, but inside it's so delightful.

I put up the christmas lights outside last night, the office ones just now and I'm going to do our interior this evening. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. (Or at least drop below 80!)

Some Good News

The Urologist called us this evening and said that the radiologist had a chance to review the scans. He believes that the mass on Larry's kidney is a cyst that was bleeding. If this is the case, we will just have to monitor it yearly. The Urologist wants Larry to have one more set of scans, a CT without contrast and a CT with contrast. The doctor did say that the radiologist was leaning towards it just being a cyst. I really feel God has answered all the many prayers being said on behalf of Larry. Thank you all.

I did it!

Well, we didn't make it home. Instead, crashed at a hotel in Orlando. About 3.5 hours from home, but the kids were done, and I was starving. But, I made it! Despite the slow Internet access and family stuff, I made it through the Thanksgiving holidays. It's clear sailing from here on out.

Sheyism: issie down: while laying on the floor, or just throwing your head back while walking. Means upside down. Yell jubilantly through the house: "Issie down! Issie down!"

Sheyism: Run around with your arms straight out making rumbling noises, then stop and look expectantly at your audience and say, "Airplane!"

Flavor of Horror

Last night I drempt I was married to Flava Flave. I think it was the scariest dream I've ever had.

Zoo Day Today

We headed to the zoo today for a little family fun. It was perfect weather too. Crisp but not too cold, so the animals were out and about. Peyton had a grand time running about and Shey fell asleep. Lovely, lovely. That's all I have to say.

Happy Turkey Day

We completed the trip from hell about 6 last night and are now settled at my parents house with a fire blazing and turkey cooking. With all that is going on, there are still so many things to be thankful for. Family, friends, of course. Food on the table and a roof over our head. Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Peyton is busy making a collage of turning leaves to take back to school on Monday to show his class what fall looks like.

I'll close with a song.

A turkey for me and a turkey for you.
Turkey that doesn't taste like a big brown shoe.
Turkey de dee and a turkey de dap.
I'll eat my turkey then I'll take a nap.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Day 22 - 8 days to go

I think I can, I think I can.

Only a crazy person participating in NaBloblahblah would be on the computer at 7:30 in the morning in a hotel making sure she got her post in for the day. It could be that, or the 5 hours spent in the car with two children who took turns screaming over the same toy car. Why, oh, why did I not bring the blue car. (ha, and I'm even working movie references in.) So, we have about 6 hours to go today, but I will be buying another car before we leave this city. We also have saved the DVD player for today, so hopefully we can make it with our wits in tact.

See ya on the flip side.

Separation Time

Well, folks, those of us participating in NaBloblahblah, it's time to separate the boys/girls from the men/women. We're heading into a highly traveled holiday. Who of us will be able to continue to log in every day and post in our blogs? I'll be fighting my mom's dial-up for a few days. Here's hoping we'll lose some people and they'll only be enough remaining to win those fabulous prizes!

Back to Square One

We met with the Urologist at the U of Miami this afternoon. He reviewed the scans firsthand without looking at the previous reports and said that the picture of the mass doesn't appear to be clear either way. There are signs that this is just a fatty tissue mass, which would be left alone, and there are signs that it may be more and need to be removed. Also, there are some tell tale signs of a cancerous tumor that aren't there. The Urologist is going to show the scans to the radiologist on staff, who he swears by, and we will call them when we get back in town on Monday.

So, it's not great news, but it is hopeful news. Pray that the radiologist looks at it and says, oh yeah, that's just a wod of fat. Not the most pleasant thought, but better than cancer any day.

Today is a Beautiful Day

When the boys and I left for church this morning, there was a hint of chill in the air. Fall has finally reached South Florida. Shey and I did yardwork afterwards, while Larry took care of some work inside. We had the back doors and windows open and the breeze swept through the house. The one thing about finding out something like Larry and I have is that we have rediscovered how blessed we are as well. So, so many people have reached out to us. Between all the churches in our family, there are thousands praying for us. Larry and I have found strength in each other. Through it all, we are still laughing. The situation could be so much worse. It's gonna be all right.

I guess I should clarify

Yesterday, we went to Larry's PCP to get the results of the CT scan from Friday. The radiologist report of the CT scan said there was no infection and that the complex mass was atypical of renal cell carcinoma, or cancer. It's not confirmed by the specialist, but I'm not sure if they can confirm what it is before going in and looking first hand. I've read that if they even suspect cancer of the kidneys that they won't biopsy for fear of spreading it. For now, the tumor is contained within his right kidney, which is a blessing. All the other organs look clear. With all this being said, I suspect they will just remove his kidney.

The thing that really pisses me off (beside the whole mess) is that the radiologist that looked at the CT scan from Friday gleaned more information from the first CT scan Larry had in the hospital. This is the same scan that the ER radiologist was all over the board when he read it. Had the Er radiologist been more confident in their findings, we wouldn't have been running all over the place trying to get answers for the past three weeks.

Thank you for all your prayers. I guess the good thing is that if it is cancer, since it's contained in his kidney he won't need further treatment after they remove the kidney. This just sucks.

Renal Cell Carcinoma (Suspicious)

For now, that's the diagnosis. We meet with an Urologist at the U of Miami on Monday to see what the next steps are. The doctor called me directly, so I drove to Naples last night to see Larry and tell him in person. We're both pretty numb right now. Please continue to have us in your prayers.

Lesson Learned

Some mornings Shey busts through the classroom door like he owns the place, waving hello to everyone, grinning and carrying on. Some mornings, he pitches a fit as soon as we walk through the door, clinging to my leg and carrying on in a different fashion. This morning was one of the latter days. Generally, when he has these "episodes" I gently dislodge him to the teacher and high tail it out of there. I always hang outside the door for a few seconds to see if he will calm down, and mostly he does. I figure it's like a band-aid, rip it off quickly.

This morning though, Peyton ran to his classroom by himself, so I had a couple minutes to spare. I squatted down by Shey and chatted with him a while. Led him to the table so he could finish his donut (shut up, it's dairy) and just stayed. A few minutes later, the class was getting ready to go outside, and Shey got up with them and headed out the door. He waved, "Bye-bye, mommy!" and off he went.

Well, color me a bad parent. Imagine, my baby just wanted a few more minutes with me, just an extra moment, a hug, and a chat. Oh, how I love that little guy.

Blogging Dora Style

After being pumped up by Fussy's pep talk, I ran over hear to share with you the theme song for NaBloblah blah:

We Did It! (sang to the tune of Dora the Explorer ending song)

We did it!
We did it!
Montaseema (Whatever that means in Spanish)
We did it!
We wrote in our blogs every day for a month!
We did it!
We did it!
It was really tough going, but we showed our stuff!
We did it!
WE! DID! IT!

Yay! I had such a good time writing blogs with you guys this month! What was your favorite part? Oh, I liked that part too! Thanks for helping!

(Clearly, NickJr has taken over my brain.)

Missing You

Larry and I have been so connected lately with the whole kidney issue that his being out of town this week has affected me more than it normally does. I miss him with my being. After I left dinner last night with our friends, I sincerely thought of continuing the drive to Naples just so we could be together for the night. Nine years ago when we first met, I would have done it in an heartbeat, but age and mommyhood have taken away some of my compulsions and so I went home instead. I miss him though something fierce and Friday can't get here soon enough.

Halfway (Almost) There

Day 14 - I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Larry is away in Naples this week (Florida, not Italy) and some friends are in town from CA, so I get to have an adult dinner tonight and the in-laws have the boys. Yippee! We're going to my favorite restaurant (Blue Moon) and then I plan on going home and watching UltraViolet. Hopefully, it will be decent.

Also, I found a new blog (well, new to me) Mommy Needs Coffee. A great read. Most of the time, when I find serious bloggers, the ones who do this regularly with great readership, I am just in awe. The thought and work that goes behind creating entries is just amazing. The amount of words and the variance of the language they use to describe everyday tasks and the more meaningful topics just astound me. I'm so quick to whip something out and just stand back and think, look an entry! You would think I would have more of the writer drive with my degree in English and my love of reading. Alas, I fall short, and so I direct you to a better equipped blogger. I also read through her archives on her gaming blog, which of course intrigued me, but I refuse to even look into the game for fear I will become addicted too.

And there is my entry! Look at me! :-p

The Bed Making King

I have never been a bed maker. Even the few times in my life that I have had nice comforter sets, I still never make the bed. I will, when putting up the laundry, drag the sheets and quilt up to make a nice flat surface, but to make it nice and neat every morning would near about kill me. We have cleaning ladies who come every other week and they make the beds. Lately, Peyton has been noticing more when they come, generally because I am screaching for him to pick up the toy room before they get there the next morning and also because in said play room, they will take the toys that Peyton puts aside so his brother can't reach and the ladies intergrate them back into the pile of toys that one day I swear I'm going to go through and throw away half of them. (holy batman, long sentence)

So anyway, back to the bed making. After the girls came last Thursday, Peyton commented on his bed and how nice it looked. You know what, the little booger has made his bed every morning since then. He pulls the comforter up, puts his pillow and the sham at the top, then puts his big Eeyore at the foot. He even goes so far as to spread his baby blanket, with the little teddy bear head, out in the middle. It cracks Larry and me up. The kid won't put his shoes on in the morning without a fight and he still refuses to wipe his own butt most the time, but by god, his bed is made every morning!

I make a point to tell him every day too how great it looks. I'm hoping before long, I can release the cleaning girls and let Peyton take over!

---

On the kidney front, Larry went for his CT scan on Friday, and the results will be faxed to the doctor's office by Thursday, so I am calling today and trying to get his follow up appt. However, the staff is supossed to return at 2 from lunch, and it is now 2:25 and the answering service is still picking up. Argh! I made him an appt on December 1 with the Cleveland Clinic for a second opinion. He still feels fine physically, which is good. We're both a little drained mentally though, and I'm fighting some sinus mess. Blah.

Sunday Football

Football may very well be the sport of the devil. I'm not saying I don't enjoy watching a game every now and then, but Sunday after Sunday, All Day Long, gets very old. Especially when there are children involved and fantasy football. Fantasy Football is the boil on the ass of society. Fantasy Football takes the casual man who watches one team per week, to a crazed maniac, who must keep an eye on Every Single Game because his players are spread across the board. And we all know that watching these players causes them to play better. Blah, that's all I've got to say about that.

First 5K Complete

I ran the 5K this evening at Tradewinds Park Festival of Lights. It was pretty cool, the holiday decorations were up, but not open to the public yet, so we got a sneak peak. My running partner finished at 35 minutes and I finished just at 40. I'm pretty proud of that time since I've only been "training" for about 6 weeks, and not too strenuous of training either. I'm going to print out a training guide and be more prepared for the next one. It was fun.

Day 10 - Just a Swangin'

I'm not sure why this phrase has been in my head lately. There's definitely no swangin' going on in my household. Larry has his CT scheduled for this afternoon. Hopefully, the staffs of all the doctors are on the same page and this will give us some news. My brain is just so tired of all of this. I know this sounds harsh, but I just don't do well playing the sympathetic wife, or person for that matter, for long periods of time. I want to know what's going on and I want it to be handled. This limbo shit if for the birds. I know these things take time, but I am just so done already and it's only been two weeks.

I remember when Peyton had a nasty sinus infection a couple years ago that we just couldn't get to go away, and I felt the same then. The constant fevers, no clear cut answers from the doctors and the never ending worrying just drove me crazy. I rememeber thinking, I just couldn't handle it if one of my kids had a chronic condition. I give all the credit in the world to the parents who have to deal with long term illnesses and things of that nature.

Patience is a virtue and one that I do not have.

Just a Bloggin'

Posting once a day for whatever that acronym is reminds me why I could never be a writer full time. To actually sit down and write a well thought entry day after day is intimidating and my creativity is struggling to keep up. I'm just hopping most of the bloggers forget a day and I'll land one of the great prizes for completing this mission!

What a Cluster F*ck

After I wrote my entry yesterday, the scheduler lady called Larry to let him know that she had double checked with the specialist, and the original scan he had written was not exactly right. With this being said, Larry did not have to take the Magnesium stuff, and instead needed to pick up some Berium from the imaging center to drink 2 hours before his scan. Larry thought this was great as he was not looking forward to pooping his brains out.

We went for his blood work this morning, which is an ordeal in itself as Larry HATES needles and things of that nature. We made it through without him passing out, then went home for him to take the berium and await his 11:00 scan. When we arrived at the imaging center, they looked over the Rx again and informed us that the specialist has specified that he wanted a clearer picture of any stones that may be on his kidney, rather than mentioning the mass (which we are more concerned about). Further, should the specialist really just want to rule out stones, then the berium was no good because it actually hides stones on the CT scan. You can imagine, we were less than happy.

Larry got on the phone with the specialist, who was less than helpful, saying she couldn't reach the doctor, blah, blah, blah. Larry called bullshit and told her, look, we're worried about this mass on my kidney that could be cancerous, HELLO?! After about 10 minutes of back and forth, and me restaining myself from grabbing the phone and chewing her a new asshole, she took down the number for the imaging center and said she was would try and get a hold of the doctor to clarify.

Three minutes later at the most, she called back having already reached the doctor. Unavailable my ass. He confirmed he wanted a regular CT scan with no contract, no IVP, or anything. The problem is, the berium has to exit your body through elimination and this takes a few days. Seriously, can these people not get their acts together so we can figure out what to do?!?

We scheduled the CT scan for late Friday afternoon and we'll hope the berium has passed through his system by then. I am so freakin' frustrated and just want to let the specialist have it for writing such a confusing Rx to begin with.

And this, my friends, is why they call it practicing medicine. Ba dum dum.

Test Scheduled for Larry

Larry has his IVP scheduled for tomorrow morning at 9. This is a detailed CT scan with dye, from what I've read. He has to drink that magnesium crap they gve you for a colonoscopy starting at 2 this afternoon and only have a bland dinner.

I'm getting nervous again. We had both chilled out after the last meeting with the doctor, but with the test looming over us, I feel a little constriction in the chest. And I know it's not as important as his health, but the whole money thing has me concerned too. Our dedutible, then 20% of everything, then if he does have surgery, that will be time out of work. He has about 2 weeks of time, and I guess we could use short term disability if we have to after that. I'm just ready to know already what's going on and what we have to do.

Can I Biggie Size this Bed?

My dear husband was so kind as to leave me some Chinese food last night knowing I would be hungry after my trip home. And I was, however, it was a bit spicy and I retired to the bedroom not long after eating, only to toss and turn without sleeping. I remember looking at the clock a few times and just wishing for morning to come so I could get the day over with and try the sleeping thing again.

Then sometime in the night, between 2 and 3, Peyton came and crawled in the bed, which normally doesn't affect my sleeping too much, however, I was already awake and he was having a field day with my ear. (Playing with the ears of anyone other than himself is something he has done since he was about 9 weeks old.) Then he started talking in his sleep. I finally dozed off when Shey woke up. Larry brought him to bed with us too, and I tried to put Peyton back in his bed, but he started carrying on and I didn't want to fight him, so he came back to bed with us. There we were, two little and two big monkeys sleeping, or trying to, on the bed.

Ah, it's good to be home.

Home Again, Home Again

I've had such a great time visiting, but I'm ready to go home now. I miss my kids (gasp!) and Larry. I think we had a little too much fun last night as I am Hung Over this morning. Ugh! The flight home may not be as pleasant as the flight here. Pray we don't have any turbulance.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday T!

I'm so glad I was able to come up for the occassion.

The Thing I Miss Most

Being in Alabama this weekend has reminded me of the one thing I really miss aside from my family and friends, of course. That is the changing of the leaves in the fall. I forget how awesomely beautiful the leaves are in gold, burnt orange and deep red. Even driving down the Interstate is like being in a picture book.

My friend and I went shopping today and we both spent money neither of us have, but you have to, you know. Now I'm sitting here typing this while my Bliss Triple Action Oxygen mask tingles on my face. Yay for charge cards!

Day two, Day two

Because I don't have enough to do, I started another blog called Book Reviews By Me. I'm going to try and post there everyday with new books, however, tomorrow will be the exception as I am going out of town to see my very best friend in the whole wide world turn 30 on Saturday! (Hey T! I'll be there in a few hours! wheeeee)

I'm not promising they will be the most professional reviews, as I'm trying to write true to me rather than all criticy, but they should improve as I get in the swing of things. (Hopefully ha)

On the kidney note, spirits are high as we await the CT scan next week. We have three churches officially praying for us, and countless other individuals. Keep up the good work, we feel the strength coming through. :) I can't tell you how much Larry and I appreciate our friends.

We Have a Plan

The Nephrologist (kidney specialist) was able to squeeze us in yesterday, and what a squeeze it was. We waiting 3 hours before seeing him. We're not complaining though, we were happy to get in. Larry even sat patiently, which is pretty miraculous for him.

The doctor had a great bedside manner and explained everything to us, down to the difference between a Nephologist and an Urologist (one treats, one cuts in basic terms). He scheduled another CT scan for Larry next week so we can have a comparison to the first one after Larry finishes the antibiotics. He said it very well could just be a nasty infection caused by the stone that has absessed. He did't promise that Larry may not need some type of procedure or even the kidney removed, but he didn't seemed rushed to operate. This makes us feel so much better. We can handle surgery if it's necessary, but just to jump right on the table freaked us out.

To me, Larry having an infection makes more sense. Just keep praying for us!

---

On another note, I'm still "training" for my 5k and this morning I jogged 8 minutes before taking my first walk break. Go me! It wasn't the fastest pace, but a jog nonetheless. I may be able to do this without making a complete ass of myself!

Update

Well, we made some calls this morning and Larry has an appointment with a kidney specialist on Friday, maybe even tomorrow if they can squeeze him in. He also has an appt with an Urologist at the U of Miami on November 15. We're praying. Our meeting on Friday with one Urologist was rather quick, so we are hoping she was just rushed into making a decision. Hopefully, another doctor will have seen this before and will have a better understanding of what we need to do. Thanks everyone for your prayers. It means so much to us!

How to Turn Your Life Upside Down in 24 Hours (in 10 easy steps)

1. Have your spouse wake up with lower back pain.
2. Have the pain be so bad, you take him to the ER.
3. Have the ER give a preliminary diagnosis of kidney stones and run more test.
4. Have two CT scans and an ultrasound run.
5. Have the scans show a strange mass on your spouse's right kidney that they don't know what it is.
6. Spend 12 hours at the ER, then go home with no news really and an appt. with an urologist.
7. Go to the Urologist and have her and her partner tell you that the mass needs to come out.
8. Have them also tell you that in order for the mass to come out, the whole kidney needs to come out.
9. Also, they don't know if it's cancerous or not until the kidney comes out.
10. This all needs to happen in the next 3 weeks.

Of course, we're going to get a second opinion and see a kidney specialist, but we're both terrified.

I just wish it was me instead.

Wise One I May Not Be

Seven miles last night I ran.
Full of blisters my feet are.
Speaking like Yoda I know not why.
All night long it was in my head.

Walking long distances is a strange thing. Before I leave, I'm hyped up and ready to go. The first mile I think what am I doing? This is crazy. Then somewhere in the second mile, the blood starts flowing, you settle in to the pace and your body takes over. After the halfway mark, it's just gravy and as my walking partner says, you have to get back to your car anyway!

I signed up for a 5k on November 11. It's a night run through a holiday lighted park, so it should be fun. I don't think I'm ready since I still get winded when I run for any amount of time, but I'm hoping the adreneline will kick in and I can finish in a decent time. They also have kids races so I'm hoping Peyton will participate in that.

You Smell Stink

Make Up Alley is somewhat of an addiction of mine. I rarely purchase make-up or cleansers without first spending a great deal of time researching my options and getting real life people's reviews on the products. One day I was just looking around and pulled up the most popular just to see what was out there. I reviewed the aspirin mask first, and then I started reading about apple cider vinigar. Of course, I was intriqued and went the next day to Whole Foods to pick up some ACV and jasmine water (my attempt to mask the smell). I've been using this mixture a few times a week for about a month now and honestly, aside from the smell, it's a pretty good toner. I don't think I would recommend it for someone with dry skin, but my skin is slightly oily and when a do get a bump, it dries it up in a couple days. I guess you could even use it just to dab on bumps if need be.

So anyway, I hadn't used it for a few days, and then I put it on last night. The smell dissapates within a couple minutes unless I guess if you get really close to my face, which is what Peyton did. He wrinkled his nose and crinkled his lip then said, "You smell stink!" Personally, I just think I smell like an easter egg.

---

Last night after we put Peyton to bed, he was chattering to himself in the usual fashion. I was reading, so I had tuned him out, but then I picked up "36, 37, 38, 39, 40!" Then he enthusiastically said, "Good job!"

A Plethora of Printables

At the suggestion of my online buddy, Bonnie Wren, I registered a domain name for my new venture and Voila, Plethora-of-Printables is born!

Please check out the site. I've added some pages and made it more my own. Pass the web address around too. :)

So in the Dark

The nation's sixth-largest school system lost its leader Tuesday, after a sharply split board voted to fire Superintendent Frank Till.

With Peyton's first day of kindergarden rapidly approaching, I feel I should be more knowledgable about the school board and public school system that he will be attending. I'll be honest with you, public school terrifies me. Mostly the unknown. I attended a small Christian private school all 12 years and have no idea the inner workings of the public school system. The idea of my 5-year old son in a school with over a 1,000 other students stops me in my tracks and makes my heart flutter at an alarming pace.

I've read reviews and articles about the elementary he is zoned for and I'm pretty confident that the school is a good one, but I'm worried how this firing of the superintendent will disrupt the whole system. Also, the vote was almost split, which is indicative of a troubled board as well.

If anyone has any good ideas on where to begin my search for more knowledge, please let me know.

New Web Based Business

Ok guys, here's my new venture. I'm sure I will play around with the website some, but I didn't want it to be overwhelming. What do you think.

Inspiration Station

Project in the Works

I'm working on a new project that would involve a web based type of business to bring in some extra cash (hopefully). I'm excited because it's something different and the products aren't expensive, so it shouldn't be hard to sell. Also, the business is just starting up, which is cool.

Sooooo, if anyone knows anything about making a webpage, or a good hosting site, let me know. I'll post as soon as everything is up and running.

Stepping it Up

A co-worker is training for the Disney marathon that takes place in January. There are a group of women walking the marathon with her and they meet throughout the week to train together. Yesterday, she asked me to join her as Wednesday is a shorter distance night and I agreed. We walked 4 miles in an hour. I feel pretty good today except for some stiffness and a couple of blisters on the lower part of my heel where it meets my Achilles tendon, a weird, weird place for a blister. I've read up this morning on blisters and now know I need to lube up my feet before going out. I also need to buy a couple more pairs of good running socks. I'm pretty much in awe of myself. I know it's not a huge distance, but it's more than I've ever done.

Next week, they are doing 6 miles and I'm actually kinda looking forward to it.

Claiming my Blog

Technorati Profile

Help, Anyone . . .

For the past couple of months, Shey has been getting up sometime between 2 and 4 am. It doesn't happen every night, but more often than not. I thought when we reliquished the pacifier that it might get better. I should have know though, he never cried because he didn't have his pacie, he just cried. Most the time I go in there, calm him down, then leave the room. He still cries, but he goes to sleep after a couple of minutes. This, though, is getting exhausting, very fast. Last night he woke up at 2:30 and I did that, then he kept crying, "daddy, daddy, daddy." This almost bothers me more than the moaning, "maaaammmaaa" It now bothers Larry too and last night he was going to go in there and just lie down on the guest bed, but I said, "no, he needs to go to sleep." and he did, eventually. But then at 5:30, he was up again, so I ended up on the guest bed in an effort to get another hour or so of sleep.

I'm thinking about just sleeping in the guest bed tonight so we can all sleep. What is up with our children and their avoidance of sleep?!?!

Things to Remember

Peyton and Shey have been doing so many cute little things lately that I just wanted to write some of them down to remember.

Shey has this teddy bear he received when he was born that plays the ABC's when you squeeze the block he's holding. The other night, I squeezed it for Shey, and he started singing along with the bear. He didn't know all the letters, but he had the tune down pretty well and would interject a letter here or there. We must have squeezed that block 10 times to watch him bop up and down to the ABC's.

When I picked Peyton up from Sunday school yesterday, his teacher was letting all the parents know that all the boys had prayed in class. My heart swelled up and it was all I could do not to cry walking down the hall to get Shey. When we got to the car, I asked hom about it and what he prayed for. He said, all my friends mommies and daddies, grandma and grandpa and poppy and grandmommie. Then I had to try not to cry again.

Shey has been talking up a storm lately. His latest is to ask me what things are,

"what's this?"
"lotion"
"oh."

"What's this?"
"shower"
"oh"

"What's this?"
"lotion"
"oh"

(That wasn't a typo, he asked me what the lotion was like 500 times.)

Yesterday, our friends came over with their new baby twin girls (awwwwwwwww) and they brought pastries over to snack on. Larry shared his with Shey, who promptly said, "hmmmmmm, good!"

Peyton's rule for bedtime, (meaning the one he came up with) is that if he wakes up in the middle of the night with a stomach ache he can come to our bed. We repeat this rule out loud every night before he goes to bed.

It's really crazy the difference in the boy's heights. We've noticed that Peyton has looked taller lately, especially in comparison to Shey, who doesn't appear to be growing at all (in fact, he's compact and can fit in most oversized compartments (inside laugh at home)). When I took Peyton to the doctor last Monday for a rash, they measured him and he's 44 inches tall, 2 inches taller than he was for his 4 year check up in May. He's going to be taller than both of us before he's 10 probably. Shey on the other hand, is growing mentally, but he's still so little, and it's just so cute. I just want to be able to remember them at these ages.

Teachin' 'em Early

Imagine my surprise when Peyton brought home his "homework" exercise yesterday and it was a photo of a keg. Imagine my greater surprise when I glanced at the bottom and noticed the publisher: Pensacola Christian College.

No Excuses

I went at lunch to the running store nearby and was fitted for walking/running shoes. Now I have absolutely no excuse to get my ass out of the house and move. It's a really nice couple who run the store and the wife let me know of a runner's club who exercise together really close to my house 3 days a week, so I'm going to look into that as well. I figure even if I get out there for one of the sessions and then meet with a friend a couple other times a week I should be good.

Let's get physical, physical.

On a Roll

Two days in a row I've gotten up to do my Denise Austin Fat Blasting Indoor Walking DVD. Woohoo. ha ha Actually the plan is to that this week to get back in the swing of things (it's only 15 minutes) then next week, a friend and I are going to start walk/running a couple nights a week. Also, my co-worker is signing up for a half marathon in December and she's trying to convince me to walk it with her, which I may. That would give me some good motivation. I would like to lose about 10 more pounds, so that means I have to really buckle down. Larry was talking about fasting next week, which I've been wanted to do again too, so that would be nice to do it together.

We're obsessed, obsessed, I tell you. That or certifiable.

A Wee Bit Peeved

Tonight, we celebrate Yom Kippur as all good Jewish folk should do. The thing is, Larry's family are not practicing Jews. This fact alone normally would not bother me as I know there are many a people who celebrate holidays even though they're aren't "strict" with their faith/beliefs/whatever at other times. What bothers me is we are "breaking the fast" at Larry's aunt house and she is serving fish, bagels and egg salad, as apparently, we are allowed dairy products, but not meat. This still doesn't bother me, I can eat fish, whatever, no big deal. Here's what bothers me, she's not "allowing" us to bring food the boys will like, ie. chicken nuggets, ham sandwich, etc. I still wouldn't have a problem with this if they went to synagogue or actually meant any of the celebration. I daresay their refrigerator will have meat in it somewhere whether we are eating it tonight or not, and their kitchen definitely is not kosher.

Larry's mom offered to feed the boys at her house (which is next door) before we went, but then what am I going to do with the boys while I eat in this kid unfriendly house? Instead, I plan on taking Peyton some shrimp (which isn't Kosher! but isn't meat) and Shey a PB&J. Oy Vey.

Crikey!

Barbara Walters interview with Terri Irwin last night was simply heartbreaking. Larry and I were lying in bed watching it, and the tears just rolled down my cheek. The viewers could hear the love in her voice and her determination to continue her husband's work at the zoo and to encourage everyone to be "Wildlife Warriors." They also showed footage of their daughter Bindi and her speech at her dad's memorial. Poor Terri couldn't even speak and was in tears the whole time.

Bob, their son, worries me the most though. He's not old enough to have strong memories of his father, and he will be bombarded the rest of his life with footage and people telling him how great his dad was. I can just see him being so pissed that he never was able to have a relationship with his dad and shunning the whole animal community. I sincerely hope and pray that he will have someone to help him work through that kind of emotion. What a huge void in his little life already.

When Barbara Walters asked Terri what she would miss the most, she tearfully said, "Steve was fun. He didn't sweat the small stuff." I often say that about Larry, "He makes me laugh." I feel as long as you love one another and can laugh together, you can survive anything. I hope Terri Irwin is able to find the laughter again soon.

Passing on the Pacifier

Monday morning on the way to school I decided, Today is the day to give up the pacifier. Well, for Shey, not me. I find it best to just jump in, make a split decision, and go for it when it comes to things like this. Thankfully, both my children have been pretty accepting to my mad, mad methods of weaning them off various items.

So Monday, I dropped him off at school without the pacifier, and off we went. I guess I should preface this by saying, it seems the last few weeks, Shey has become really attached to this little plastic device that has become parked in his mouth so much that we would rather suck on it than eat the fine meals I provide. It also seems his teachers have been giving into his demands as well, when in the past he would go all day without it. This was especially evident when Larry picked the boys up on Monday afternoon and his teacher commented, "You forgot to leave a pacifier this morning. We had a difficult time at nap." Oops, guess I should have clued them in on the change.

Surprisingly, Monday evening, Shey was more cheerful than he's been in a while, which continued up until his bedtime, at which time, he screamed for about 15 minutes. Which really, isn't horrible. Peyton used to do that on a nightly basis. Shey woke up about 3:45, I gave him some juice and did break down and offer the pacifier then, so I could sleep. When he woke up again at 7:30, I made him leave it in the bed, which he was not happy about, but we survived.

Tuesday he slept at naptime and last night, he went down without a fuss. He did wake up at 6 this morning, but I just got him some juice and brought him to bed with us. He was pissed! He beat Larry's ass for a good 10 minutes before he calmed down and asked for cartoons. It was so early, but at least he made it through the night without it. I'm giving him a few more days before I throw them all away.

Now, if only potty training goes this smoothly.

RIP Cyst

We arrived at the hospital at 8:00 and after getting Peyton registered and all, he was finally called back for prep at about 10:45. We entertained him by playing UNO, which is the champion of the world, and reading a new dinosaur book we bought him. He was such a big boy. They made him walk back to the OR without us or any sedative, then had him lay down on the table and gave him the mask to put him to sleep before they started the IV. The nurse told us afterwards, he did great.

The procedure itself only took 16 minutes, and we were back in the recovery room with him just after he woke up. That was really the only time he was upset, and understandably so. He looked so little curled up on his side with the hospital blankets pulled up around him. After 15 minutes or so, he had calmed down, and the nurse brought him a popsicle. After that, we played more UNO waiting for him to finish the bag of fluids.

They finally took him back to the original waiting area about an hour after the surgery, and the nurse removed all the heart monitors and IV (which he did, with Peyton watching and Peyton didn't even feel it.) After that, Peyton wanted to get dressed and he hopped off the bed and grabbed a puzzle to play with. I thought he would be groggy for most the day, but apparently, he has energy to spare. We had to work to keep him somewhat calm that afternoon and he never really complained of any pain.

We go back next Tuesday so they can look over it and remove the butterfly band-aid, and then he will be good as new. No outer stiches to remove, so hopefully not too bad a scar.

Thanks for all your comments and prayers! I'm so glad this is over. :)

Proceeding with the Procedure

When Peyton was born oh so many moons ago, he had a small cyst in the hollow of his throat. It looked like a little pimple one could pop quite easily. However, the peditrician told me to leave it alone for fear of infection. Last year, we had scheduled him to have it removed, but the day of the surgery, while we were waiting on the doctor, Peyton had the greatest coughing spell known to man and they promptly (after 2 hours of waiting) cancelled it. We finally got our shit together enough to reschedule it and tomorrow is the big day.

I'm not nervous so much about the actual procedure itself. It's really quite simple, and an adult would have the cyst removed with local anethesia, however, a four year old runs the great chance of moving, and as such, they knock them out. And this is the part that bothers me. That slight, slight chance that something may happen with the anesthesia. I've never even been under, I hate for Peyton to be.

Thankfully, the procedure really shouldn't take that long, I'm guessing 30 minutes tops, so we won't have terribly long to worry. Send up your prayers for my little guy, please.

Working with Dad

Since my parents live in Alabama and we are in Florida, I rarely have the opportunity to work on home improvement projects with my dad. I'm definitely the "handy" one in Larry and my relationship, so I enjoy doing things around the house myself. A few weeks ago while we were in Lake Placid, we picked up a copper outdoor shower that I intended to install myself. Larry kept telling me to have a plumber do it, but I wanted to figure it out myself.

Mom and dad were in town this past weekend, so it was the perfect opportunity to have dad help me install the shower, and it's a good thing he did. We headed to Home Depot Saturday morning to pick up the connections and piping we needed. Apparently, there is much more to rigging an outdoor shower than I imagined because we needed several different connections, an elbow, a splitter for the hose, and 7 ft of copper tubing.

It took us the better part of 2 hours to hook everything up, mount the shower and run the tubing. It was hot and we sweated our asses off, but it was nice working with my dad. I wish we had more chances to do it.

Chell help

I was just on the home page and saw something about upgrading your blog to Blogger Beta. You would need to have/create a gmail account, which is just an e-mail address through google, if you didn't know that. It was easy to upgrade, they save all your stuff and put it on a new template, and then you can add categories and such and it's easier to move things around.

Motivation (or lack thereof)

I was doing so well, really. Exercising almost every day, eating good, feeling good, and then it just went all down hill. I haven't touched a yoga DVD in 3 weeks, and I'm eating like shit. Thankfully, I haven't really gained any weight, but I just feel bloated and blah. The thing is, I don't even want to do it now. Ugh, I hate this. I know I would feel better, it's just getting up off my ass and doing it. I should probably fast again for a few days just to purge my system of the crap I've been putting in it. That would take motivation too though. I need my own personal cheerleader.

(Chell, I've tried to leave you a couple comments, but my new blogger beta won't match with your blogger, and D-land won't take them either. Upgrade your blog, woman.)

Baby Girl

Dear Sita Leigh,

I know it's crazy of me to be writing to you at all, but I'm feeling a bit melancholy and you were the one I wanted to talk to. Your dad and I have decided to not have any more children, and while I know it is for the best, it still breaks my heart just the same. I love your brothers with all my heart, but you were the one I always imagined growing up. I pictured us shopping, having spa days, fighting and being best friends. I guess I was always so close to your grandmommie, that I couldn't imagine not having a daughter of my own. And here I am with two little boys and I space in my life where you should be.

This is a bit over the top, I know, but I thought it may help to get it out and let you go. It's silly really, to be upset over a child I've never met, but there it is. Your mom's a nut job. She loves you though, here or not.

Love, me

A Blessing

When Larry came back to work for our company last September, they told him he was eligible to earn a bonus for 2005, but his review would not occur to January 2007. We agreed to the terms at the time because really, our company is a good one to work for, and we wanted him back here. I figured the extra 4 months really wouldn't be that big of a deal as far as monetary matters were concerned.

In March, our property taxes were reevaluated at our two year anniversary, and being the first year they were calculated on our buying price, they jumped about $500.00 a month. I tried not to think too much about it at the time, but these past six months have been a little difficult. This was exaggerated by the fact that Larry and I didn't cut out spending right away. Even though we've tried to do better the last couple of months, it still seems we are living paycheck to paycheck.

I've always felt God looked out for us, whether I was faithful to Him or not. Life's always worked out for Larry and me. Somehow the money has always come through.

As my whole profile thing states, I've been evaluating my life lately and trying to be a better person overall, physically, emotionally and spiritually. This included starting to attend church again. I made excuses about going for years, the main one being that I would be basically going alone since Larry has no interest in going, and the kids would be in Sunday School. In May, Larry took me to the Baptist church by the house and I really liked it. The next week, I found out the new guy that started working with us goes there with his wife and kids. Hello Divine Intervention. Since then, I go when I'm in town and my coworker and his family save me a seat, and I don't feel so alone.

After a couple months, I knew I wanted to place membership and as such, I felt I should start offering contribution to the church. (I'm not writing all this as a "look at me", there is a point.) Things are sometimes tight, but I felt it was important and Lord knows (no pun intended) that we spend money on much, much less when we want to.

Tuesday afternoon, Larry received a call from my boss who had conducted Larry's review, (without being prodded, which is a rarity, and also even though it's not January like they negotiated in the beginning) and gave Larry an 11% increase in his salary.

I know God's not going to just hand over life on a silver platter, but I do feel this is a way of Him saying, See, I will take care of you. Our preacher just completed a series on Stress, how to handle it, and how to be done with it. I've grown up knowing the verses which talk about the birds in the air, who don't worry about where their food will come from and God provides for them, how much more so He will look after us. About not worrying about the future, each day has enough troubles of its own, but these were words in a book, that I haven't always put my full faith in. Now though, I've been given a big glaring billboard of my very own.

A Different Kind of Anniversary

It was 6:00 that morning and I had awoken with an agenda. Larry had no idea that there was a little test in the guest bathroom waiting on me and that first morning pee. So, of course, this was the morning that he asked me to walk the dog, and as to not raise suspicion, I did. I rushed Zeus downstairs and let him out for as long as my bladder would allow.

I hurried back to the bathroom, peeled open the foil packaging and read the directions for the zillionith time. One line, not pregnant. Two lines, pregnant. I took off the cap and finagled my body into that lovely trying not to pee on yourself, but rather a little test strip position and let loose. I sat the test on the counter so that it was perfectly straight, lest I disrupt the angle and get a bad reading.

The wetness moved along the strip and instantly one, then two lines appeared. My heart caught in my throat and my stomach dropped. One year and nine months of waiting had just come to an end.

I ran into our bedroom and woke Larry up, who stared at the test like it was a cryptogram he didn't know how to read.

"See, see, two lines."

"I only see one."

Exausberated, I turned on the light, "Ow!"

"See???"

The recognition dawned in his eyes, and we were both quiet. We laid there together, deep in our own thoughts, planning, wondering, imagining.

Zeus

Apparently the stress of being our mascot was too much for Zeus because he woke me up at 2:30 this morning having a seizure. I first heard a tapping, like popping gum out of a plastic wrapper and I thought he may have gotten into the trash and was chewing on something. When I got up though and found him, it was his toenails tapping on the tile floor. I picked up one of his front paws and his nails were extended and his paw felt like a muscle cramp, which is what I thought it was at first, but then I felt the other paw and it was the same and his whole body was tense. I just petted him telling him everything was ok, I guess trying to talk him out of it. I’m not even sure he knew I was there, and after talking to the vet this morning, I think that a good assessment.

It lasted a couple more minutes, so I yelled for Larry thinking we may have to take him to the emergency vet, but thankfully 30 seconds or so later, his body relaxed and he shakily got to his feet. He acted all excited, like what are you guys doing up, so I don’t think he knew it had happened at all. It was pretty horrible, and even after we got back into bed, my hands were tinkling from his nails pressing into them.

I spoke with the vet this morning and he said that epilepsy is actually not uncommon for sheepdogs, and a few other breeds. In fact, his Labrador had the same thing and lived with it for 7 years without medication. He recommended running some blood work just to rule out any other issues like liver or blood sugar problems, but more than likely it’s epilepsy. He also said to monitor him and keep a journal to make sure that they aren’t getting longer or more frequent, but as long as they stay apart, that there’s really nothing to do.

I do hope that’s all it is. Zeus has been with us since we were married and he’s our first baby

Reduce Me

In about 5 hours, this man will see me partially naked.

(How's that for a grabber. ha ha no pun intended.)

I'm going for a consultation on a reduction/lift that I hope to have done next April with Larry's bonus money. I know people say you should love your body, blah, blah, blah, but I've wanted this for years, and it's for me, no one else. I know I'm not huge, but I'm larger than I want to be, and I'm tired of buying bigger shirts so my boobs will fit, and I'm tired of them drooping around my knees. (It's so attractive!) And maybe, I can even play golf without them getting in the way. I think that's the biggest thing, they're just in the way.

Bye, bye, boobies, good riddance.

Crocodile Hunter

The untimely death of Steve "Crocodile Hunter" Irwin has really bothered me. I have such a fascination with people who live with such passion and knowledge of a particular topic, and this death hits me with a devastating blow. Also, he and his wife, Teri, seemed to share such a love for each other, staying married for 16 years, when most couples nowadays, especially those in the spotlight do well to make it a couple years. My heart goes out to her and their children. I just can't even imagine their heartache right now.

Meet our Mascot

I've been thing lately about building my readership. All the big names cross my mind, Dooce, Fussy, and Ballpoint Wren. I think, hmmmm, what do these amazing women have on their blogs that I am missing (aside from great content and witty commentary?). And then it hits me . . .mascots!

Dooce has Chuck . . .

Fussy has Cookie . . .

Ballpoint Wren has Mojo . . .

Let me introduce you to . . . Zeus!

Zeus is a Shetland, who has been with us for almost 7 years. He's very talented and has an arsenal of tricks up his sleeve. Observe . . .

Zeus can

Sit!

Zeus can

Lie down!

Zeus can

Walk away from the camera!

and for the "piece de' resistance." Zeus can

Yawn!

Look at Zeus go. I can feel the hits hitting harder already. Step back, Mommy Bloggers, we are on the scene!

As promised, here are a few photos of us slippin' and slidin' down the huge water slide at our cousin's birthday party. As you can see, we had a grand old time.

Today, we went to a friend's house who lives on a lake and rode their jet skis. The boys passed out on the way home. Don't have much else to report.

I'm not as good as I once was

Tonight. Tonight, is the long awaited Toby Keith concert. I am PSYCHED! Polictical, whatever, views aside, he puts on a amazing show. This will be the third time I've seen him and Larry's first. Yes, my Jewboy is in to country too. We have a group of 10 of us going, going to do a little tailgating beforehand, then rock the house. (that sounded so dumb) Anyway, yay for concerts!

Butt Swatter

This morning as I was pulling away from Peyton's school, I noticed he was sitting on the bench by his teacher. I pulled back in the spot to check on him, see if he was in trouble, or just sitting. I called for him to come over to the fence and his teacher told him to tell me what he did. I asked him and of course, he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I dunno." He wouldn't say, and then started crying, so his teacher walked over and let me know that he was hitting kid's butts, which I knew about, and we've been working on, but Peyton's just having a hard time grasping why other people don't like this. The thing is, he's not doing it to be mean, it's more the affectionate, hey, we're on a football team together, butt swat.

Peyton's a touchy-feely kid. He always has a hand on someone's ear, or head, or face, and now their butts. I wonder even if the other kids would notice if the teacher hadn't pointed it out, but now they have, so the kids tell on him when he does it. I felt so bad for him, with the tears welling up in his eyes, and his little voice saying, "I'm trying to remember." I know you are, sweetie, just wait, in 12 years, it will be ok again.

Excel at Excel

Why are blank Excel spreadsheets so much scarier than blank Word documents?

Here We Go Again

Stupid, stupid storms need to go away!

We had a great time at Lake Placid this weekend with Larry's parents. It was a nice relaxing time, just getting away with no set schedule. Then when we came home yesterday afternoon, Larry's little cousin had a birthday party that we went to. They had rented one of the big water slides for the kids, which they all had a blast on. Peyton went right up, and then Shey wanted to go, so I took him. It was so much fun, we're talking about renting one for Larry's birthday just for the adults. What an adrenaline rush. We took some photos, I'll edit and get up here as fast as I can.

My Rocket Scientist

I know you can't see all the detail, but Peyton made this jet out of Legos, and I am so impressed. I don't think I have the foresight to make something this realistic looking by using big Legos. He can recreate it over and over too. It's so fascinating to watch his progressions from stacking a bunch of blocks and calling it a rocket, to this, which actually looks like an airplane. He's doing so well in school too. His teacher said he's the one kid who always knows the answers. I just hope his teachers are ready to keep him busy in the future.

Waiting on 5 o'clock

I bought this and this at lunch today and I can't wait to try one out tonight. I think I am sick, and I need some help. Mutant Erika, get off me!

Letting Go

Tenth Avenue North led the singing at our services Sunday morning and during one song the chorus say, "and we raise up holy hands . . ." Some of the people will do this, I never have. I don't think there is anything wrong with it, I just feel weird doing it. The people who raise their hands are those charismatic folks on TV who speak in tongues and heal people with the touch of their hands. I guess that while I've found these last few months attending this new church moving, I'm still working on the outward appearances.

The singer explained though that raising your hands is not saying, "hey, I'm super Christian, look at me raising my hands." but rather an outward showing of "Hey, I'm a mess and I need some help." I had the vivid image of a child reaching their hands up to be picked up by their parents. I like this image.

To further solidify this idea, the preacher (I'm still having a hard time calling him Pastor, another one of those childhood notions) started a new series on stress management and not surprisingly, the first step of handling the noise of life is surrendering your life to God. All of it.

That's scary. Not sure why, but it is. The whole relationship, a personal relationship, with God makes my breath catch in my throat. Strange, how the one person/being who is not supposed to ever let you down, is the one I'm most afraid to open myself up to. Even thinking about it now makes my chest tighten.

I'm working on it though. I'm ready to feel the peace, ready to let each day take care of itself, ready to be a better person.

I've put off writing this entry, the one that throws my new spiritual journey out there. Don't want to be one of those fanatical, you know. But I needed to for myself, if I'm going to work on this, it has to be fully.

So there you go, and someone please pass my mom the tissues.

Be Nice to Me, I Gave Blood Today

The traveling dracula buffet was in our office plaza this morning, so as I am now the perfect person in every shape, form and fashion, I hopped on over there to donate a little life. They used some new system on me call Alyx, whereby they remove my blood, take what they need, and give me back my plasma. Strange, strange. The tech kept trying to show me the whole process, and I kindly said, no, no, I'm good. I did take a peek every so often, but I didn't want to study the damn needle in my arm. Ewwwwwww.

Tomorrow is spa day. A friend and I are going for a chocolate wrap thing, a facial and a pedicure. I can not wait! Pamper me, please.

Updating everyday

I'm really trying to get into the habit of updating this blog everyday, but sometimes, there just doesn't seem to be much to talk about, that's interesting, that is. Last night I was superwoman, I cooked dinner, did the dishes, bathed both the kids, and did 45 minutes of yoga. Go me. The scale is hanging at the same number, but I figure all this work has to be doing something. Doing/performing/practicing yoga with your husband on the kitchen and your 4-year old playing/whining/trying to steal your blocks isn't quite the rewarding/relaxing/pleasing experience it should be, but I'm trying. And man, am I sore. Who would have thought holding a pose and stretching could create such soreness. I'm quickly becoming addicted though. And I've decided that following a yoga DVD with peaceful yoga, rather than Denise Austin's hyperactive yoga is much more pleasant.

And there we have it, my yoga impressions.

Beep Beep Beep

I was in the middle of negotiating a deal with the Pro shop to trade golf shoes and a new driver for vet services when an urgent hand shoved me and a whisper came out of the dark,

"Ka, what's that beeping?"

I layed there quietly for a moment, listening, groggy from sleep, until I heard it too.

"It's the computer. There must have been a power surge."

Of course, I knew what the beeping was. We've lived in the house over two years and I investigate the weird noises, know the house without turning on the lights, and am awake all the time. Apparently, it has been a figment of Larry living with me, because he has yet to master the floorplan of the house and its noises.

As he walks down the hall that is straight, and leads directly to the office, he turns on the hall light, which floods all three bedrooms with light.

Fucker.

Then he has the nerve to give me lip for being aggrevated at being awoken at 4 am.

"But you're always up!"

But I wasn't this time, or I would have walked down the hall, in the dark no less, turned off the computer and returned to bed without anyone in the family being none the wiser.

Slumbering Little People

How beautiful they look,
lying in the king size bed
they kicked us out of at
5 this morn.

Starting Anew

Peyton began pre-K this morning. In celebration, (and also because I am suffering from a diaryland mental block) I decided to start a blog. It seems when I want to write an entry, it's normally only a sentence or two anyway, which lends itself to the blogging world, rather than an entry.

So, here we are.