Sometimes God whispers to you. Sometimes you think He's not there at all. Sometimes though, you get a big ole' "HELLO! HEAR ME!" Oh boy, did I get one of those last night.
I guess the past year or so, I've been making a conscious effort to be more verbal about my faith. I'm definitely not out preaching on the streets, but I'll try to work little things into a conversation, mainly it circles around whatever series is going on at church. That's easy though, Church by the Glades stickers are all over Coral Springs and in an area where people generally prefer to party rather than pray, our church has seemed to become the "cool" place to be in our little city.
I'll be honest though, I don't sport a Church by the Glades sticker on my car. I try to justify it by saying that Larry doesn't like things like that on our cars, and he doesn't, but it goes deeper than that. If I have something on my car declaring I go to church, then there's that added accountability when I may be acting in ways "unbecoming a Christian." (Isn't that a phrase from our past!)
Maybe I cut someone off going down the street. Maybe I was driving a little too fast. Or maybe I had a beer at a restaurant and someone will see me get into my car. All of these things normal people do, but I say I don't want to set a bad example, so I chose to be no example at all.
What's worse though than a simple sticker for my car is I don't actively share my beliefs with those I love most. Obviously, Larry knows I go to church, but it's not something we talk about often. Oh, I'll try to bring it up now and again, but it makes him uncomfortable, so mostly I let it go. Or my in-laws, I invited them to Elizabeth's dedication and they came, but I haven't extended the offer again. Even with some of my closest friends, I'm mute. Funny, how I can be so open with people I barely know and so tight lipped with those that matter most to me.
Of course, it's easy to play the part with people who don't know the you who's not always "perfect."
So, anyway, back to the big, blaring "How do you do" from God. Last night, I was listening to Casting Crowns new song, "Courageous" and I was thinking how true it is. We were made to be courageous, but we're standing on the sidelines. After the kids went to bed, I hopped on my new favorite addiction, Pinterest and on the front page, Kristin had posted the following verse from Joshua 1:9
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
I mean, seriously? How much clearer could it be? So obviously, I need to do some serious soul searching and I have got to start being the person I should and want to be.
My first step is to commission by BFF,
Crazy Mama to create me a Courage necklace as a constant reminder of this lesson I so needed to hear. My next step is to pray, pray, pray and open my mouth a little more. It's scary. I'm even nervous to write this post and put it "out there" on Facebook, but if I can't even do that, well, that's just sad.
So, here we go. Pastor David always says, if you feel excited but also so scared you might just pee your pants, then you are probably right where God wants you to be. I may just be joining Whoopi and buying my some Poise. oh, ha, ha, ha.