Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Peace at a Country Concert

My high school boyfriend, Robert, loved Brooks and Dunn, the country duo. We listened to their music quite a bit and went to two of their concerts during our tenure together. The first concert was in Birmingham and occurred after one of our break-ups and getting back togethers. I remember standing beside Robert, listening to "That Ain't No Way to Go," looking up at him and seeing tears running down his cheeks.

"Lipstick letter 'cross our mirror this morning saying 'Goodbye, Baby', you left without warning. Like a thief in the night, you ran away with my heart."

He told me later that he had been so upset when I broke up with him and that he felt it had come out of nowhere. I can't remember now the exact circumstances of the break up, but I do remember that moment and the love I felt for him in that space and time.

After we broke up for good and Larry and I started dating, I didn't necessarily stay clear of Brooks and Dunn, but I didn't seek them out either. Not sure if it was a subconscious decision, or just because Robert always liked them more than me.

They've played several times in our area and we've never been. I didn't think I knew enough of their songs anymore to warrant the price of admission and Larry never expressed an interest in their music.

We found out recently though that Brooks and Dunn were beginning their last tour and I decided it would be nice to see them one last time. They always did put on a good show. We were going to purchase lawn seats, but a few days before the concert, my boss offered me his seats, which were great. Thirteen rows back and near the end of the row.

Larry and I had a great time. The group still puts on a great, high energy concert and I was surprised that I still know all of their songs. They didn't play "That Ain't No Way to Go," but they did play another oldie that was amazing, "I Believe"

"I raise my hands, bow my head
I'm finding more and more truth in the words written in red
They tell me that there's more to life than just what I can see
Oh I believe"

I could feel the emotion running through the crowd and tears welled up in my eyes.

Sometimes it is incredibly hard to do the things I know I should while living down here, so far from my family and friends that are active church goers. I admit that I don't go every week, but I do make a point to not let too much time pass between services. And I always take the boys, even when they would rather stay home with Larry. My momma always said, "Marry a Christian Man", but I didn't get it. She went to church alone (well, with me) and I didn't realize what a big deal it was. I love Larry and I don't regret marrying him, but I do wish he would go to church with me and be involved.

When "I Believe" was playing though, I felt this sense of peace. A sense that it would work out and eventually, he will come around. All of the sudden, Brooks and Dunn took on a whole new meaning in my memories of life.

I've been listening more lately, with my spiritual ears. Hearing God talk to me through other people, the radio, sermons, and now country songs. There are some changes coming to our household, possibly financial, which I can't talk about yet, and hopefully spiritual too. I'm going to just keep praying and listening.

Wednesday, June 02, 2010


This weekend, my high school graduating class celebrated its 15th year of freedom and can I just say that I feel incredibly blessed. While high school is high school, I can't say that I just hated that time in my life. Of course, classes drug on and on, boyfriends, well a boyfriend, broke my heart several times, and self confidence was not always high, but I had friends. Real friends.

Many of my classmates were together from elementary school, as early as first or second grade and those that came later, joined us in junior high. There were so few of us, that we had to stick together. Some of my best girlfriends were in chorus with me for four years, sharing adventures with Mr. T., trips all over the south and our weekly Sunday night performances. Most of these girls also went to the same church, which included more trips together, youth group fun and hanging out most weekends. These are the girls that I made up crazy stories with, shared intimate details of my life with and leaned on to make it through the school day.

After we graduated, some of us drifted for a while, but with facebook and blogging, we've been able to reconnect over the past five years and I am so grateful. I'm not sure if it is because I don't have any siblings, but there's just something about having friends who have known me for years and years. I loved being able to laugh with them over the crazy things we did in high school. To know that our paths may have woven through life differently, but they still love me for me.

I know any of the women that I spent time with this weekend would drop anything to help me out and I would do the same for them. I love you guys and can't wait to see you again!

PS - Next time, we must take pictures!