A Reminder

One day I will edit the photos of Peyton hating the camera on Christmas morning and post them, but for now I saw this on Clover Lane and had to share. As we gear up to totally remodel the house to accomodate baby girl, I sometimes find myself wondering, why are we doing this again?! Here's a nice reminder:

From an Erma Bombeck Column:


A young mother writes: "I know you've written before about the empty-nest syndrome -- that lonely period after the children are grown and gone. Right now, I'm up to my eyeballs in laundry and muddy boots. The baby is teething; the boys are fighting. My husband just called and said to eat without him, and I fell off my diet. Lay it on me again, will you?"

OK.

One of these days, you'll shout, "Why don't you kids grow up and act your age!"
And they will.


Or, "You guys get outside and find yourselves something to do ... and don't slam the door!"
And they won't.


You'll straighten up the boys' bedroom neat and tidy -- bumper stickers discarded, bedspread tucked and smooth, toys displayed on the shelves. Hangers in the closet. Animals caged. And you'll say out loud, "Now I want it to stay this way."
And it will.


You'll prepare a perfect dinner with a salad that hasn't been picked to death and a cake with no finger traces in the icing, and you'll say, "Now, there's a meal for company."
And you'll eat it alone.


You'll say: "I want complete privacy on the phone. No dancing around. No demolition crews. Silence! Do you hear?" And you'll have it.


No more plastic tablecloths stained with spaghetti.
No more bedspreads to protect the sofa from damp bottoms.
No more gates to stumble over at the top of the basement steps.
No more clothespins under the sofa.
No more playpens to arrange a room around.


No more anxious nights under a vaporizer tent.
No more sand on the sheets or Popeye movies in the bathrooms.
No more iron-on patches, wet, knotted shoestrings, tight boots, or rubber bands for ponytails.


Imagine. A lipstick with a point on it. No baby sitter for New Year's Eve. Washing only once a week. Seeing a steak that isn't ground. Having your teeth cleaned without a baby on your lap.


No PTA meetings.
No car pools.
No blaring radios.
No one washing her hair at 11 o'clock at night.
Having your own roll of Scotch tape.


Think about it. No more Christmas presents out of toothpicks and library paste.
No more sloppy oatmeal kisses.
No more tooth fairy.
No giggles in the dark.
No knees to heal, no responsibility.


Only a voice crying, "Why don't you grow up?"


and the silence echoing, "I did."

To Believe or Not to Believe

Christmas falling on Saturday is really messing me up this year. We are traveling to Alabama this Sunday and then plan on heading back the following Sunday. I was thinking how difficult it would be to make the kids wait the whole week to open their gifts, just to pack up that afternoon to leave the next day. Mom and I talked about it and we agreed that we would just celebrate Christmas on Thursday. And I said these exact words, "It's not like the kids will know the exact date anyway."

Silly me. I keep forgetting Peyton is in third grade and not quite as clueless as his five year old brother. Who, now that I think about it, probably knows Christmas falls on Saturday too as I'm sure they are discussing it in class. But still, I didn't think about it, because, hey! presents! three days early!

So this morning on the way to school, Peyton was asking if we could stay in Alabama a few extra days basically for the reason above. I laughed and said, "well, I thought we could have Christmas on Thursday. I didn't realize you would know the date." He just looked at me like I was the clueless one and said, "Mom, I'm not dumb." Point taken.

We talked some more and then he says the following, "So, can we open your gifts on Thursday and then Santa will bring his gifts on Saturday?" This, coming from the boy who has told me that Santa's not real and even taunted his brother with this knowledge as well. I looked at him to see if he was joking or covering up for Shey, but he was serious. I really wasn't sure how to handle it. Did I use that time to finally squelch the belief in Santa, or so I now play along and strengthen this new belief?

I hem and hawed a bit and said that maybe Santa would make a special trip for us on Wednesday night. Now, though, I'm thinking we'll just hold one gift back and Santa can come on Saturday as he's supposed to.

If I haven't said it enough, Peyton is such a unique child. I know they all are, but he just takes it to a whole new level. I mean, seriously, he can't decide what he wants to do or believe, it's no wonder he's so frustrated all the time. Sometimes he seems so grown up and he has since he was a baby, but then other times, the little boy in him comes out and I'm not sure how to handle it. I guess I need to treasure it especially as he's getting older and that little one will show up less and less often. Oh, that boy.

*Edited to add: I just glanced at the Christmas card I chose and hello, there's my answer. You'll see soon, as they went in the mail today. :)

And by the way, I have 10 cards left over, so if I have any lurkers out there who want to exchange cards, let me know and I'll send one out.

This is my Son

Early this morning about 3:30, Peyton came into our room and said, "You know how I have to watch Shey throughout the night? Well, he just fell off the bed." I didn't hear any noise coming from Shey's room, but I followed Peyton in there anyway and sure enough Shey was lying there whimpering on the bed. I rubbed his leg a bit and climbed in bed with the both of them and after Shey drifted off to sleep I went back to my bed.

Then I started thinking about what Peyton had said. Not just simply, "Shey fell out of the bed," but "I have to watch him throughout the night." It's humorous because, really, we've never once asked Peyton to check on Shey throughout the night. Shey doesn't have some condition where he needs to be checked on throughout the night and if he did, we wouldn't ask Peyton to do it. And, also, as far as I know, Peyton doesn't get up throughout the night to check on his brother. He does get up to use the restroom and then come to our room, but to check on Shey, I don't think so.

But that's Peyton. There's always a reason for everything and it is generally in his favor or makes him look good. He definitely an interesting child, one that can't really be explained without spending some time with him.

Mom bought me Setting Limits for your Strong Willed Child and I started reading it last night during Peyton's soccer practice. Thank God, he does not act out in the manner of some of the children documented in the book, but he definitely carries the traits of a strong willed child. While Shey is a natural pleaser, Peyton likes to test and push.

The book is very easy to read and offers good sound advice without asking the parent to come up with these elaborate rewards systems and charts that you can never keep up with. A phrase that stuck in my head last night from the book was "you [the parent] are not the problem, but you can be a big part of the solution." The book explains the whys of your child's behaviour, how you shouldn't take it personally when they test and argue. If you are able to do so and not see their actions as an attack, then you can remain calm and handle the behaviour accordingly. The author emphasizes that the strong willed child will continue to test, but over time and consistency, they will learn to tune into your words and respond accordingly.

I'll be honest, this is the first child rearing book that I've actually started reading and plan on finishing. It's not overwhelming and it just makes sense. I'm looking forward to completing the book and implementing the techniques provided.

Halfway There!

Yesterday, I hit the halfway mark of the pregnancy. Wow. I still can't believe I am pregnant most the time. It's just weird. Since I've started feeling better, the weeks are just flying by and I know with the holidays, they will continue to do so. It's so funny to me how a couple of weeks ago, all I felt were flutters and now just two weeks later, the kicks and rolls are setting in. I've even been able to feel Baby Girl on the outside occasionally if my hand is in the right place. We've also started the process of rearranging the house for this little one. Not even born yet and she's already taking over. :) I'm excited to do the nursery though, if we can ever get to that point.

I'm horrible at taking my own photo, but here's half a belly shot.