An Update on the Other Children

With all the pink cuteness going on in the house the past 5 months, I've been a little neglectful in keeping everyone informed on my first and second born.

Peyton and Shey have now been in school for a month and are settling in to the afternoon routine of being home rather than constantly entertained in aftercare. Peyton is in fourth grade, which totally blows my mind. He likes his teacher and from the work coming home, is doing quite well with his studies. (Facebook math questions aside.) He's thinking about running for treasurer and I really hope he does. I think it would be a great experience for him. He continues to grow and grow and stands at around 4'9" or so. I suspect one morning soon I will wake up and he will surpass me. He is definitely maturing. A fellow parent told me last soccer season that nine brought a better reasoning ability and maturity and I'm seeing it. Most the time. :)



Shey is now in first grade and hasn't said much about school or his teacher, but she seems very nice. He loves to be outside and spends most afternoons in the pool with our neighbor, who is the same age. He's acquired a little bit of an attitude. I'm not sure where my sweet baby went at times, but he will poke through now and again. I liken it to a three year old testing his independence, but since he didn't do it then, it's coming out full force now. He wants to be the baby and yet is fighting it at the same time. He's reading quite well and grasping all his math stuff, so that's good. Also, his conduct report is always good, so I'm guessing he just saves the 'tude for home, which I guess is the preferred venue.



I have to say though, they are both excellent with Elizabeth. They shower her with kisses all the time and help me entertain her when things need to be done around the house. I couldn't ask for two better big brothers for my baby girl.

Month Five

Dear Baby Girl,

Five months?! Really? Stop growing so fast.

September 11, 2001

It was 6:15 in the morning on T day. I had been tracking my cycles for the past year and a half. Taking my temperature every morning, praying for ovulation. Even though it was very late in the month, I had finally seen a spike in my temperature and it had stayed high for 14 days. It was still high that morning and I was ready to pee on a stick. I snuck into the guest bathroom so I wouldn't wake Larry and my hands shook as I manuevered that thin little strip. I didn't have to wait the prerequisit 3 minutes, and as soon as the liquid passed the box, the second line appeared. My heart skipped a beat and then started racing. I hurried back to bed, turned on the side light and shook Larry awake. He squinted at the test in my hand, a little confused and still half asleep. We laid in bed that morning in awe of the change about to occur in our lives.

We eventually got up and got ready for work. Since mom and dad are an hour behind us, I waited till after nine to give them a call with the news. Little did I know, mom was calling me at the same time with much different news. What an insanely, surreal day. On one hand, I was alive with excitement and on the other, devasted by the events in New York. Our lives were affected forever in more ways than one. 10 years have passed and I can still feel the emotions that overtook me that morning. A moment I will never forget and a day we will always remember.

Hurting

What do you write when all you can think about is one thing? What do you say when there is nothing to say? When you can't make it better or even be there to help. When there is a constant ache in your heart that you know is nowhere near what they feel. I pray selfishly. For healing. For the hurt to go away. All day. I don't feel like it's enough, but there is nothing else I can do.

Deciding to Stay Home

After the each of the boys were born, the idea of staying home passed fleetingly through my thoughts without much sticking power. I enjoyed being an adult and going to work everyday. It was nice to have that time with Larry without the kids around. However, as Peyton came upon school age, I started rethinking my decision. I wasn't thrilled with the idea of them having hours after school to roam around until I got home from work. I knew I had some time to make it work, but I wasn't sure if we would ever be able to afford it. The problem with having two incomes is you spend those two incomes.

The last three or four years, I was really restless at my job. It wasn't what I had planned for my life as I had fallen into the position, but I couldn't see starting somewhere else. My salary was good, I had a good deal of vacation time, etc. and I didn't have a boss breathing down my neck all the time. As far as a job went, it was great, but still I wasn't happy.

When I found out I was pregnant, the idea of staying home didn't just flit around my thoughts, but rather it implanted itself and took root. I ran numbers all the time in my head as I paid the bills and balanced the checkbook, but I still didn't see how we could make it work. After I had Elizabeth, I still hasn't worked the logistics out, but the desire to stay home was stronger than ever. I'd get ill thinking about leaving her just to sit at a desk all day and be miserable.

Funny how there's always that one thing that puts you over the top in decision making. We had paid some credit cards off and we were getting closer to making the one income thing work, but we just weren't there yet. When I went in for my 6-week postpartum visit and learned that my doctor's office had been ill advised by my insurance company and I did owe the $5,000.00 deductible as I had feared, it sent me over the edge. To say the least, I was pissed to learn that this was one more monthly payment that was going to keep me from staying home with my baby girl.

So, I got to figuring.

I won't go into the exact numbers here, but I added up as much of our debt as we could pay off, just leaving our mortgage, utilities and Larry's lease. That figure was very close to some money we had access to. Very close.

I don't believe in coincidence, but I do believe in providence. And to me, this was God practically yelling at me that this was the way our family needed to go. I just knew. And so I didn't look back. I gave my notice shortly after and have not regretted my decision at all. It's not to say that I've never gotten aggravated or lonely, but I've never wished I'd stayed at my job.

God continues to let me know that I'm following His plan by sending random help our way. For example, our homeowner's insurance finally went down, so we're getting money back from our escrow. I'm doing so much better personally too. Reading my Bible more, attending church regularly, having more fun with the boys, exercising, cooking dinner, playing Words with Friends (ha) . . .It's amazing how much one can do when you're not tied to an office for 9 hours a day.

And really, could you leave this sweet one?

Month Four

Dear Little Bit,

Hello Four Months, you've been pretty fun so far. You think you are so much older than you are. Trying to sit up on your own, wanting to hang with your brothers and looking at our food like you can't wait to eat it.



We do need to talk about the apparent onset of early separation anxiety. Really? I didn't even think you should know exactly who I am just yet, but apparently, I am pretty important. If someone else is holding you, even daddy sometimes, and I leave the room or even stray too far, holy cow, at the scream! As soon as I take you back and you figure it out, you are all smiles again. We're going to have to work on that Baby Girl.



Other than that, you are one happy baby. I love it in the morning when you wake up cooing and smiling at me. What a great start to the day.



You are a little drooly though. Actually, more than a little, A LOT. Need some teeth there, little one. I'm trying to remember to keep a bib on you, but sometimes I forget and then your whole outfit gets wet.



Look how big you are!



You are my Joy, sweet one. I thank God everyday for the gift of you.

Love, Mama

Elizabeth's Room (Finally)

I guess since I need to take the bumpers off her bed, I should post the pictures of the final product. I do love her room and the way it turned out. I can't believe the transformation from a stinky boy's room to a pretty princess' room.

Here's some before.





Wow, even I had blocked out the craziness of that room. Here's all the trash that was under his dresser. I'm just slightly embarrassed.



Ahhh, this is better.






I was able to match her crib to Shey's old dresser and the bedding turned out better than I hoped once I got it home. It's definitely pink, but I like it. I still need to put some pictures up on the wall, but that's a project for another week.

No Limits

My friend, Rebecca recently wrote a post about limiting God. I was going to leave her a comment, but it was going to be too long, so you get a blog post out of it.

I just finished a series by Virgina Smith called Sister to Sister. It chronicles three sisters and their journeys to having a closer relationship with God. They're fun and not overly in your face, but more practical to everyday life. Applying God's love to your life in a real way.

Anyway, in the first book, the middle sister hears a missionary speak at their church and she is intrigued by the emotion in her voice and the force of her conviction. The missionary shares a story about a child in a third world country who wished for chocolate ice cream. This occurred in a country where there was no milk, chocolate, or really any way for this dream to come true. But the child prayed for it anyway. I can't remember the specifics, but it was something like there was an airplane with supplies that came shortly later and by a strange set of circumstances, they had chocolate ice cream on board.

The story stuck with the sister and she felt saddened that God had never given her her "chocolate ice cream." She later makes a trip to hear the missionary speak again and afterwards was speaking to the missionary's husband. With tears in her eyes, the sister asked, "Why haven't I ever gotten my chocolate ice cream?" The husband looked at her and smiled and said, "Have you ever asked?"

The baby's up, so I can't finish all my thoughts on this subject just yet, but there's another post coming dealing with my decision to stay home and it goes with this same idea. I'll leave with this, as Christians, I think we need to start thinking of God more as our Father than a big man in the sky who's not involved with our lives.

Month Three

Baby Girl,

How are you three months already? I can't believe the time has gone by this quickly. You are full of smiles, especially in the morning. Except on the day I took these pictures. :) Oh well.



You're still a tiny thing though. Fitting into size one diapers and I only moved you up a clothes size because I was tired of seeing the same onsies over and over.



You're settling into somewhat of a routine. Eating every 3 or so hours and cat napping throughout the day. Night time is better. You go to sleep between 9 and 9:30, sleep till 3ish, eat and then sleep till 7:30 or so. On the weekends, when I don't have to get up with your brothers, you will even go back to sleep after that bottle and we get a couple more hours of snuggle time.



Yes, that's right, you still haven't slept a night in your room, but I am putting you in the bassinet more. Don't want you growing up too quickly.



You don't like to lay like a baby much anymore, preferring to sit upright or even stand. You can sit in the Bumbo for a little bit and it makes me laugh.



I can't believe that if I was still working that I would have had to leave you. It makes me sad to think about it, so I'm glad I don't have to. You are my Sunshine.

Love,

Mommy

Every Mother Counts

Agree with her views or not, Heather Armstrong (aka Dooce) is a woman, wife, mother, blogger who can make things happen. She was recently approached by Christy Turlington, (yes, the supermodel) to get involved with her project, Every Mother Counts. Heather just returned from a trip to Bangladesh and she has started recounting her experiences there on her blog.

As mothers, we can't ignore this any longer. Even if you can't donate your time or money, you can pray for these women who don't receive proper prenatal care, and who die while giving birth. In 2011. Heather recounts speaking to a man who lost his wife during child birth. This man stated that they just learned TWO years ago that this didn't have to be the case. We are blessed beyond measure.

At the very least, click on the link Heather provides to make Yahoo your home page and help support the cause.

Foot or the Internet

A few days ago, the boys were playing a rousing game of This or That and Peyton asked me, "Would you rather save your foot or the Internet?" I answered almost instantly, "My foot."

However, after turning my computer over last Thursday to a friend to clean up and not getting it back for four days, I may be rethinking my choice. It wasn't so much the goofing off on Facebook that I missed, but I didn't realize how many times a day I consulted the Internet for other things. Answers to questions, paying bills, checking on shipping, etc. And especially my new obsession with saving money while grocery shopping. I actually had to go to Publix over the weekend without checking out Southern Savers first. THE HORROR!

So, what do you think? Would you save your foot or the Internet?

Two Months Old

Elizabeth aka Ellie Raine, Little Bit, Baby Girl, is definitely more alert. She's full of smiles and likes to boogie.



She's sleeping 5-6 hour stretches at night, feeding and then sleeping another 3-4, so we're progressing nicely in that department. Her doctor told me to move her into her room now to help her sleep longer. He'd probably crap if he knew she wasn't only sleeping in our room, but our bed. Don't want to hear it. She's the baby and my last one.



Miss Personality still has her bad evenings, but I think they're getting better. I find if I can get her to sleep before she's overly tired, it makes things better.



Larry and I have decided that I will stay home (Yay!) and Monday, I gave my resignation to work. It's exciting and scary and a whole other blog post that I may or may not get around to in the near future.



Overall, things are going well and we're plugging along.

In The Last 24 Hours

Last night, we took Peyton out for ice cream to celebrate his birthday. We were in the shop about 10-15 minutes, but when we returned to the car, it wouldn't start. I have a smart key, which seems cool til you have to use it all the time and then you just wish for a regular key. So anyway, we thought it was a problem with the key not registering as the car was acting funny when only a little bit before it was fine.

I dug through the manual as Larry became more flustered. The boys were a little hyper and then Elizabeth started crying. Mistake number one. ALWAYS BRING THE DIAPER BAG! Even if it is only going to be a quick trip. When after 20 or so minutes, I couldn't find a solution, I went ahead and called our friends to come and get us before there were full meltdowns from my husband and baby.

This morning, I contacted Mazda and the service tech suggested that it may just be the smart key battery that needed replacing. Hoping it was that simple, I headed to Walgreens to buy a battery and then we went back to the car. No such luck. We tried jumping the car. No such luck. Finally, I broke down and called roadside assistance and they sent a tow truck. Thankfully, or so we thought then, they were able to jump the car and get it started and I headed to the local repair shop we use.

After waiting for an hour, the service tech informed me that even though he installed a new battery, the car wasn't holding the charge and he recommended I go to Mazda in case the car was under warranty and it was an electrical issue. By this time, I was starving, so I headed home first.

When I pulled into the cul-de-sac, I noticed there was a car in the driveway. At first I thought it was my father in law and when I saw the car's reverse lights come on, I just pulled to the side to let him out. I quickly realized it wasn't him, especially, when the car basically did a three point turn into my grass in order to pull out forward out of the driveway. I thought it was weird, but thought maybe they were salesmen or Witnesses.

As I was getting out of the car, another car swung around the circle and a lady asked me out her window if I knew the car that was just in my driveway. I walked a little closer as it was so odd and answered no. She told me she was a police officer and I noticed then the uniform. Apparently, they had been watching this car throughout the city. She left then and told me she was going to follow them.

I went inside to talk to Larry about it and not 2 minutes later, the doorbell rang. It was two more uniformed cops asking for information. From what they said, there has been a string of break-ins in our city and this car had raised suspicion, so a dozen undercover cops were following it. Great! They assumed the people had gotten spooked and pulled into our street attempting to lose the cops.

I gave what little statement I could and I thought that would be the end of it.

After grabbing a quick lunch, I headed to Mazda to get a new battery.

Three hours later.

I pulled into my house to yet another strange car. This time, though, no one was inside it. As I opened the door to the house, Larry quickly said, it's ok. It's just a detective. Lovely. This time, I had to actually write my statement down. They had caught up with the car the city north of us and took the three people into custody. With my statement, they were going to charge them with loitering, but the detective said it's not a huge crime, so they would probably be back on the streets tonight.

Thankfully, even though there have been quite a few break-ins, the criminals don't appear to be violent and haven't targeted any houses when the residents were home. Even though I would hate for my things to be stolen, stuff is stuff and I'd rather my family be safe.

I never knew staying at home would be so exciting.

What Peyton Thinks

I so enjoyed reading Kristin's post about what her kids wrote about her that I thought I would share Peyton's thoughts on me.

Mom, I love it when you: watch Cake Boss with me. (I figure it is better than most shows on Cartoon Network.)

Only I know: that you are smart and an artist. (Apparently, I hide my intelligence well.)

The funniest memory I have of you is when: you pushed me down the water slide when I wasn't looking and got water in my ear. (I don't remember this, but I'm glad he thinks it's funny now.)

And my favorite one that I can't imagine where he got it from (looks innocently around)

Every day I am thankful that you: put a roof over my head and give me food.

Remember, you are: the best mom ever! (Sorry, girls! I win this one.)

Elizabeth: Month One

Today you turned one month old. How the time is flying already. Everyone is quite taken with you. Smitten, you could even say. Especially, your brothers. They don't walk by without kissing you or touching you.

I'm starting to see signs of a human emerge out of your newborness. Your eyes are clearing and you focus better. I think we'll get a true smile soon.



You have already shown to be quite opinionated and aren't afraid to let us (me) know if you don't like something. I don't think you will have any problem getting the men of the house to bend to your will though, so if you want to tone that down some, I'd appreciate it.



I love you, baby girl.

In the A.M.

- Waking up at 4:45 a.m. to feed the baby is not so bad. Staying up after that feeding is.

- Baby scooting up your stomach to nuzzle under your neck is not her way of cuddling. She wants to play, or she may be trying to run away from a poopy diaper.

- Watching baby kick one leg repeatedly after changing poopy diaper is pretty cute. Even at 5:15 a.m.

- If you find a position and motion that keeps baby happy at 5:30 a.m., you will stay in that position and do that motion indefinitely. You may even smile.

- If one more ounce is what it takes to put baby back to sleep at 5:45 a.m., GIVE IT TO HER.

- Dogs are not very good company at 5:45 a.m., especially when they start playing with a squeaky toy.

- After somewhat falling back asleep at 6:00 a.m., 6:45 a.m. comes rather quickly.

Annoucing Elizabeth

When Tiny Prints contacted me regarding their promotion for Holiday cards, I was a little disappointed I had to tell them no, as I had already committed to ordering my cards from Shutterfly. However, when I mentioned that I had a baby due in April, the representative said that I could order 25 announcements from them to try once she was born. I was understandably excited.

When Elizabeth was a day old, the hospital photographer captured her image and mom was so kind to order me a package from them that included 25 announcements. They were so precious and really showcased how tiny Elizabeth was the day after she was born. I quickly went through those 25 and still needed more, so I again contacted Tiny Prints to see if I could still order from them as well. The representative I worked with was super friendly and she sent me the instructions for my free cards.

I began my search for the perfect birth announcement and quickly settled for a simple design that showcased my little beauty.



The announcements arrived very quickly and I was impressed by the quality of the card and the clarity of the photo. Overall, I was happy with my experience with Tiny Prints and I would definitely order from them again.

Two Weeks and Two Days

Even though she is only two weeks old and her head wobbles unstable on top of her body, I can already feel Elizabeth's body making the transition from newborn to baby. At 1:00 am this morning as I patted her back, willing a burp from her mouth, she felt sturdier, her back broader, just a tad heavier and I tried to sear the memory of her smallness in my brain.

The boys look like giants now. Almost grown. And I've been trying desperately to recall their first days to little avail. I remember moments and I see snapshots in my mind, but they are fleeting and I'm left with gaps in my memory. Peyton pulled out the photo album that showcased his first and second years and I had a brief a-ha as I thought to myself, "Oh, there you are." My chubby faced first born.

As much as I'd like to stay home and watch all my babies, I know I will have to go back to work, at least for a little while. So for now, I am trying to capture every moment, enjoy every sigh and big, baby yawn. And pictures, I'm taking lots and lots of pictures.

Elizabeth Raine

April 10, 2011
7 lbs. 10 ozs
20.5 inches long.

Happy Birthday, Baby

Sure as I finished that last day of work, my water broke after we ate lunch on Saturday before we could head to Home Depot. We've been at the hospital since 4ish, epidural around 10 and I think she'll be here within a couple hours.

Getting really excited. Should be sleeping but can't wait to meet this little girl.