Crazy Love

The Crazy Thread Lady

2012-02-01T08:32:00.003-05:00

I've always wanted to learn to sew. I thought it would be super cool to whip up costumes for the kids, an airy shirt for me, or a lovely baby blanket. I also know me though. I'm bad about running head first into a project or new activity and not thinking it through. I love to give people my money and not get any return ( see Southern Living at Home debacle). I've gotten better over the years at reeling myself in, but I've still been leery about taking the could-be-expensive steps to becoming a seamstress.

But then came Elizabeth and Pinterest. Oh, at the precious baby clothes I could create at a fraction of the cost. And once again, I was hooked on learning to sew. The problem was, I didn't have a machine, nor a job. Add to that the fact that I had never actually touched a machine, I was pretty much in the dark on where to even begin.

My Mammaw had a Singer that was tucked away in a cabinet that had since taken residence at my mom's house, so when the kids and I went to visit in November, I had mom lift it up and show me some basics. I thought if I played around with it for a while, I could determine if I really wanted to learn a new skill or if it would fall away like so many other "interests".

Well, long after mom left to take care of other things, I tinkered and cleaned and *gasp* read the manual to get a better feel for everything her machine could do. And I was hooked. When my mom offered to bring the Singer and Mammaw's sewing chest to my house over the holidays, even though I took a while to answer, I said yes in my heart right away. Mammaw wasn't a master seamstress, in fact, I don't really remember her ever sewing at all. My mom would sometimes hem our clothes, or fix a tear, but sewing wasn't a focal point of my childhood. However, the cabinet with her hideaway machine and the incredibly cool chest with a rainbow of thread and other neat doodads was. Without getting overly emotional, let's just say, I'm so very happy to have it in my home and wanting to use it.

I've now become the woman who scours the Internet for new fabrics and free patterns, who awaits Elizabeth's naps with anticipation so I can create something new. My floors have gotten a little dirtier and I'm covered in loose threads, but I'm having fun and hopefully learning something that I can pass down to my little ones. Maybe one day, they will bring the memories to their houses.

Month Nine

2012-01-11T15:11:00.004-05:00

Oh Little Bit,

You're just determined to keep growing, huh? You have officially been out longer than you were in and my life will never be the same.

Everywhere we go, people can't get over how happy you are. That's what I hear all the time, "She's so happy." Except for the few times I don't dress you in all pink and then it's, "He's so happy." Either way, you are one happy baby. As long as no one else is holding you, that is. :)

Month nine has been crazy, crazy. Your brothers were on winter break, you got two more teeth at the same time (making that five), you started pulling up/cruising, and you had a cold. Sleep was not your friend, nor mine, and then you weren't so happy.

Thankfully, I think we have moved mostly past that for now and the past few nights, you have been sleeping well again. Of course, now you are trying to stand all on your own, so I'm sure things will get hairy again in a couple of weeks. In fact, during our photo shoot, you tried to stand upright from the ground. No taking it easy for you, like slowly letting go of the couch, nope, you just want to stand up on your own.

My time is up. Your brother just woke you. I love you, sweet baby. Now and Always.

Mama

Month Eight

2011-12-14T11:21:00.007-05:00

Dear On The Go,

Busy, busy, busy all day long pretty much sums up our lives this month. You are on the move all day and with both your brothers playing soccer, I am on the move almost every night. Not wanting to sit still conflicted with my idea for a photo shoot, but I guess this is a more accurate portrayal of life right now.

And when you're not moving, there's the funny faces you love to make us laugh with.

And let's not forget when you need to take a break and chew on something, anything, just get it in my mouth!

Ok, mom, here's one cute face for you.

Now, that's enough. Go away.

I love you, baby girl. You keep me on my toes.

Mama

Courage

2011-12-02T10:32:00.002-05:00

Sometimes God whispers to you. Sometimes you think He's not there at all. Sometimes though, you get a big ole' "HELLO! HEAR ME!" Oh boy, did I get one of those last night.

I guess the past year or so, I've been making a conscious effort to be more verbal about my faith. I'm definitely not out preaching on the streets, but I'll try to work little things into a conversation, mainly it circles around whatever series is going on at church. That's easy though, Church by the Glades stickers are all over Coral Springs and in an area where people generally prefer to party rather than pray, our church has seemed to become the "cool" place to be in our little city.

I'll be honest though, I don't sport a Church by the Glades sticker on my car. I try to justify it by saying that Larry doesn't like things like that on our cars, and he doesn't, but it goes deeper than that. If I have something on my car declaring I go to church, then there's that added accountability when I may be acting in ways "unbecoming a Christian." (Isn't that a phrase from our past!)

Maybe I cut someone off going down the street. Maybe I was driving a little too fast. Or maybe I had a beer at a restaurant and someone will see me get into my car. All of these things normal people do, but I say I don't want to set a bad example, so I chose to be no example at all.

What's worse though than a simple sticker for my car is I don't actively share my beliefs with those I love most. Obviously, Larry knows I go to church, but it's not something we talk about often. Oh, I'll try to bring it up now and again, but it makes him uncomfortable, so mostly I let it go. Or my in-laws, I invited them to Elizabeth's dedication and they came, but I haven't extended the offer again. Even with some of my closest friends, I'm mute. Funny, how I can be so open with people I barely know and so tight lipped with those that matter most to me.

Of course, it's easy to play the part with people who don't know the you who's not always "perfect."

So, anyway, back to the big, blaring "How do you do" from God. Last night, I was listening to Casting Crowns new song, "Courageous" and I was thinking how true it is. We were made to be courageous, but we're standing on the sidelines. After the kids went to bed, I hopped on my new favorite addiction, Pinterest and on the front page, Kristin had posted the following verse from Joshua 1:9

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

I mean, seriously? How much clearer could it be? So obviously, I need to do some serious soul searching and I have got to start being the person I should and want to be.

My first step is to commission by BFF,
Crazy Mama to create me a Courage necklace as a constant reminder of this lesson I so needed to hear. My next step is to pray, pray, pray and open my mouth a little more. It's scary. I'm even nervous to write this post and put it "out there" on Facebook, but if I can't even do that, well, that's just sad.

So, here we go. Pastor David always says, if you feel excited but also so scared you might just pee your pants, then you are probably right where God wants you to be. I may just be joining Whoopi and buying my some Poise. oh, ha, ha, ha.

Ribbons and Bows

2011-11-17T12:05:00.004-05:00

I'm still adjusting to buying and displaying girlie clothes and accessories, so when I bought Elizabeth's first hair bows, I really didn't know what to do with them. I'm trying to use my new obsession with Pinterest to motivate my own creativity and I decided to try and make my own holding place for the cute little hair ribbons.

I took the top of a mayonnaise jar, some scrapbook paper I had at the house, ribbon and Mod Podge to come up with the following.

I used cardstock for the top and alternating designed papers for the sides. I cut out an E with my Silhouette and mod podged the whole thing. When it was dry, I covered it with another coat of sparkle Mod Podge. I glued a ribbon to the back and then just stuck it in the wall with a push pin.

I think it turned out pretty cute.

Month Seven

2011-11-12T14:29:00.008-05:00

My Baby Girl,

Oh my, this was a busy month! First you learned to sit up all on your own.

And then as soon as you mastered that, you decided it wasn't enough, so you started to crawl!

And now you won't stay still. What happened to the supposed time where I could put you down with some toys and actually get things done around the house without you following after me or heading for the computer cord? I should have known you would be an early mover. You are fascinated with your brothers and no one makes you laugh or holds your attention like they do.

The time change and learning all this new stuff has really done a number on your napping schedule, so we're suffering through some nights as well, but I think we'll get it worked out soon. You're eating more too and I may try to add a couple of finger foods this month to hold your attention. You sure do eye our food all the time.

You've taught me so much, baby girl, in these seven short months. To slow down, enjoy the little day to day things and to be a better mother for you and your brothers. I enjoy every day with you, my sweet.

Love, Mama

Winners

2011-10-26T15:40:00.002-04:00

Ha, As only three people left me a comment, they all get 25 cards. I've contacted Rebecca and Carrie, but I don't have a contact for Melissa. Leave me a comment with your email and I'll send you the code.

Thanks for reading.

Sleigh Bells Ring

2011-10-21T11:24:00.003-04:00

Well, maybe not in Florida, but the current cold front has me excited about the upcoming holidays. I love checking the mail everyday during December and seeing how my friends' children have grown over the past year. Shutterfly offers beautiful choices for holiday cards, as well as many other photo gifts. A great gift is the photo calender or the photo book.

This card is a great choice and gives you plenty of space to post your photos from throughout the year.

Shutterfly also offers great choices of greeting cards for your needs throughout the year. The quality is always great and it's such a personal touch.

So whether you want Christmas cards, thank you cards, or just a card to say hello, think Shutterfly.

As a special thank you, Shutterfly has given me THREE codes for 25 cards for my friends. You only need to pay for shipping. Leave me a comment by Tuesday, the 25th and I will draw three random names for a chance to win.

Month Six

2011-10-12T09:03:00.002-04:00

Dear Ellie Raine,

You turned 6 months old this week. SIX MONTHS! Half a year already. Life is getting more and more fun. You're laughter is contagious and you will give anyone a smile.

You're starting to sit up on your own and you love to play with toys already. I can lay you on your floor and you'll be content for 30 or so minutes just rolling around and banging on various things.

This month, within days of each other, two little bottom teeth popped up. Thankfully, you weren't too cranky and they came in pretty quick. You're eating about 6 or 7 different foods right now and you'd rather eat sometimes than take a bottle.

Sleeping has been a little hit or miss lately. Sometimes you will sleep a 10 hour stretch and then sometimes, you'll still get up for a bottle. Maybe I should let you cry a little, but I just can't bring myself too.

You are definitely ready to go. I won't be surprised if you're an early crawler. You already get up on all fours and rock and you're pretty good at scooting around to get where you want to go.

I love you, baby girl. With all my heart.

Mommy

Just Hear the Ring Jing Jinga-Ling

2011-10-09T21:59:00.005-04:00

Yes, I know. It's not even Halloween yet, but the Holiday season is just around the corner and it's never to early to start planning this year's Christmas card. Since TinyPrints did such an amazing job on Elizabeth's birth announcements, I've been perusing around their Christmas card line in an effort to spark my creativity.

This card immediately caught my eye. What a great idea. It's a card and keepsake tree ornament in one. Such a neat way to be able to display mementos from friends and family.

I'm excited this year to try and capture all three kids. I'm sure I'll think about blowing a gasket in the process but I'm going to try and remember to just have fun and let the pictures speak for themselves.

An Update on the Other Children

2011-09-22T17:18:00.005-04:00

With all the pink cuteness going on in the house the past 5 months, I've been a little neglectful in keeping everyone informed on my first and second born.

Peyton and Shey have now been in school for a month and are settling in to the afternoon routine of being home rather than constantly entertained in aftercare. Peyton is in fourth grade, which totally blows my mind. He likes his teacher and from the work coming home, is doing quite well with his studies. (Facebook math questions aside.) He's thinking about running for treasurer and I really hope he does. I think it would be a great experience for him. He continues to grow and grow and stands at around 4'9" or so. I suspect one morning soon I will wake up and he will surpass me. He is definitely maturing. A fellow parent told me last soccer season that nine brought a better reasoning ability and maturity and I'm seeing it. Most the time. :)

Shey is now in first grade and hasn't said much about school or his teacher, but she seems very nice. He loves to be outside and spends most afternoons in the pool with our neighbor, who is the same age. He's acquired a little bit of an attitude. I'm not sure where my sweet baby went at times, but he will poke through now and again. I liken it to a three year old testing his independence, but since he didn't do it then, it's coming out full force now. He wants to be the baby and yet is fighting it at the same time. He's reading quite well and grasping all his math stuff, so that's good. Also, his conduct report is always good, so I'm guessing he just saves the 'tude for home, which I guess is the preferred venue.

I have to say though, they are both excellent with Elizabeth. They shower her with kisses all the time and help me entertain her when things need to be done around the house. I couldn't ask for two better big brothers for my baby girl.

Month Five

2011-09-12T18:29:00.000-04:00

Dear Baby Girl,

Five months?! Really? Stop growing so fast.

This was a big month for us. You started eating food and I'm making it. Lucky girl. You're eating healthier than anyone else in the family. Also, you started sleeping longer stretches. 8 or so hours at a time! Woohoo! Now if only I would go to bed at the same time, all would be right in the world again.

You want to be so big, trying to pull yourself into a sitting position, staring at your brothers intently, even rocking a little on your hands and knees. Slow down. You'll get there, I promise.

You've also started laughing and this just melts your daddy's heart. He loves to blow on your neck and illicit that sweet sound.

There is one thing though that's new and I'm not too crazy about it. The screech. Just because you're a girl doesn't mean you have to use such a high pitch squeal to get my attention. Just a nice little wah, wah would work.

Life with you, sweet girl, is just getting sweeter and sweeter.

Love, Mama

September 11, 2001

2011-09-10T20:36:00.000-04:00

It was 6:15 in the morning on T day. I had been tracking my cycles for the past year and a half. Taking my temperature every morning, praying for ovulation. Even though it was very late in the month, I had finally seen a spike in my temperature and it had stayed high for 14 days. It was still high that morning and I was ready to pee on a stick. I snuck into the guest bathroom so I wouldn't wake Larry and my hands shook as I manuevered that thin little strip. I didn't have to wait the prerequisit 3 minutes, and as soon as the liquid passed the box, the second line appeared. My heart skipped a beat and then started racing. I hurried back to bed, turned on the side light and shook Larry awake. He squinted at the test in my hand, a little confused and still half asleep. We laid in bed that morning in awe of the change about to occur in our lives.

We eventually got up and got ready for work. Since mom and dad are an hour behind us, I waited till after nine to give them a call with the news. Little did I know, mom was calling me at the same time with much different news. What an insanely, surreal day. On one hand, I was alive with excitement and on the other, devasted by the events in New York. Our lives were affected forever in more ways than one. 10 years have passed and I can still feel the emotions that overtook me that morning. A moment I will never forget and a day we will always remember.

Hurting

2011-09-07T08:35:00.002-04:00

What do you write when all you can think about is one thing? What do you say when there is nothing to say? When you can't make it better or even be there to help. When there is a constant ache in your heart that you know is nowhere near what they feel. I pray selfishly. For healing. For the hurt to go away. All day. I don't feel like it's enough, but there is nothing else I can do.

Deciding to Stay Home

2011-08-18T21:19:00.002-04:00

After the each of the boys were born, the idea of staying home passed fleetingly through my thoughts without much sticking power. I enjoyed being an adult and going to work everyday. It was nice to have that time with Larry without the kids around. However, as Peyton came upon school age, I started rethinking my decision. I wasn't thrilled with the idea of them having hours after school to roam around until I got home from work. I knew I had some time to make it work, but I wasn't sure if we would ever be able to afford it. The problem with having two incomes is you spend those two incomes.

The last three or four years, I was really restless at my job. It wasn't what I had planned for my life as I had fallen into the position, but I couldn't see starting somewhere else. My salary was good, I had a good deal of vacation time, etc. and I didn't have a boss breathing down my neck all the time. As far as a job went, it was great, but still I wasn't happy.

When I found out I was pregnant, the idea of staying home didn't just flit around my thoughts, but rather it implanted itself and took root. I ran numbers all the time in my head as I paid the bills and balanced the checkbook, but I still didn't see how we could make it work. After I had Elizabeth, I still hasn't worked the logistics out, but the desire to stay home was stronger than ever. I'd get ill thinking about leaving her just to sit at a desk all day and be miserable.

Funny how there's always that one thing that puts you over the top in decision making. We had paid some credit cards off and we were getting closer to making the one income thing work, but we just weren't there yet. When I went in for my 6-week postpartum visit and learned that my doctor's office had been ill advised by my insurance company and I did owe the $5,000.00 deductible as I had feared, it sent me over the edge. To say the least, I was pissed to learn that this was one more monthly payment that was going to keep me from staying home with my baby girl.

So, I got to figuring.

I won't go into the exact numbers here, but I added up as much of our debt as we could pay off, just leaving our mortgage, utilities and Larry's lease. That figure was very close to some money we had access to. Very close.

I don't believe in coincidence, but I do believe in providence. And to me, this was God practically yelling at me that this was the way our family needed to go. I just knew. And so I didn't look back. I gave my notice shortly after and have not regretted my decision at all. It's not to say that I've never gotten aggravated or lonely, but I've never wished I'd stayed at my job.

God continues to let me know that I'm following His plan by sending random help our way. For example, our homeowner's insurance finally went down, so we're getting money back from our escrow. I'm doing so much better personally too. Reading my Bible more, attending church regularly, having more fun with the boys, exercising, cooking dinner, playing Words with Friends (ha) . . .It's amazing how much one can do when you're not tied to an office for 9 hours a day.

And really, could you leave this sweet one?

Month Four

2011-08-11T16:53:00.002-04:00

Dear Little Bit,

Hello Four Months, you've been pretty fun so far. You think you are so much older than you are. Trying to sit up on your own, wanting to hang with your brothers and looking at our food like you can't wait to eat it.

We do need to talk about the apparent onset of early separation anxiety. Really? I didn't even think you should know exactly who I am just yet, but apparently, I am pretty important. If someone else is holding you, even daddy sometimes, and I leave the room or even stray too far, holy cow, at the scream! As soon as I take you back and you figure it out, you are all smiles again. We're going to have to work on that Baby Girl.

Other than that, you are one happy baby. I love it in the morning when you wake up cooing and smiling at me. What a great start to the day.

You are a little drooly though. Actually, more than a little, A LOT. Need some teeth there, little one. I'm trying to remember to keep a bib on you, but sometimes I forget and then your whole outfit gets wet.

Look how big you are!

You are my Joy, sweet one. I thank God everyday for the gift of you.

Love, Mama

Elizabeth's Room (Finally)

2011-07-28T22:06:00.006-04:00

I guess since I need to take the bumpers off her bed, I should post the pictures of the final product. I do love her room and the way it turned out. I can't believe the transformation from a stinky boy's room to a pretty princess' room.

Here's some before.

Wow, even I had blocked out the craziness of that room. Here's all the trash that was under his dresser. I'm just slightly embarrassed.

Ahhh, this is better.

I was able to match her crib to Shey's old dresser and the bedding turned out better than I hoped once I got it home. It's definitely pink, but I like it. I still need to put some pictures up on the wall, but that's a project for another week.

No Limits

2011-07-22T11:33:00.003-04:00

My friend, Rebecca recently wrote a post about limiting God. I was going to leave her a comment, but it was going to be too long, so you get a blog post out of it.

I just finished a series by Virgina Smith called Sister to Sister. It chronicles three sisters and their journeys to having a closer relationship with God. They're fun and not overly in your face, but more practical to everyday life. Applying God's love to your life in a real way.

Anyway, in the first book, the middle sister hears a missionary speak at their church and she is intrigued by the emotion in her voice and the force of her conviction. The missionary shares a story about a child in a third world country who wished for chocolate ice cream. This occurred in a country where there was no milk, chocolate, or really any way for this dream to come true. But the child prayed for it anyway. I can't remember the specifics, but it was something like there was an airplane with supplies that came shortly later and by a strange set of circumstances, they had chocolate ice cream on board.

The story stuck with the sister and she felt saddened that God had never given her her "chocolate ice cream." She later makes a trip to hear the missionary speak again and afterwards was speaking to the missionary's husband. With tears in her eyes, the sister asked, "Why haven't I ever gotten my chocolate ice cream?" The husband looked at her and smiled and said, "Have you ever asked?"

The baby's up, so I can't finish all my thoughts on this subject just yet, but there's another post coming dealing with my decision to stay home and it goes with this same idea. I'll leave with this, as Christians, I think we need to start thinking of God more as our Father than a big man in the sky who's not involved with our lives.

Month Three

2011-07-14T10:49:00.003-04:00

Baby Girl,

How are you three months already? I can't believe the time has gone by this quickly. You are full of smiles, especially in the morning. Except on the day I took these pictures. :) Oh well.

You're still a tiny thing though. Fitting into size one diapers and I only moved you up a clothes size because I was tired of seeing the same onsies over and over.

You're settling into somewhat of a routine. Eating every 3 or so hours and cat napping throughout the day. Night time is better. You go to sleep between 9 and 9:30, sleep till 3ish, eat and then sleep till 7:30 or so. On the weekends, when I don't have to get up with your brothers, you will even go back to sleep after that bottle and we get a couple more hours of snuggle time.

Yes, that's right, you still haven't slept a night in your room, but I am putting you in the bassinet more. Don't want you growing up too quickly.

You don't like to lay like a baby much anymore, preferring to sit upright or even stand. You can sit in the Bumbo for a little bit and it makes me laugh.

I can't believe that if I was still working that I would have had to leave you. It makes me sad to think about it, so I'm glad I don't have to. You are my Sunshine.

Love,

Mommy

Every Mother Counts

2011-06-30T18:47:00.002-04:00

Agree with her views or not, Heather Armstrong (aka Dooce) is a woman, wife, mother, blogger who can make things happen. She was recently approached by Christy Turlington, (yes, the supermodel) to get involved with her project, Every Mother Counts. Heather just returned from a trip to Bangladesh and she has started recounting her experiences there on her blog.

As mothers, we can't ignore this any longer. Even if you can't donate your time or money, you can pray for these women who don't receive proper prenatal care, and who die while giving birth. In 2011. Heather recounts speaking to a man who lost his wife during child birth. This man stated that they just learned TWO years ago that this didn't have to be the case. We are blessed beyond measure.

At the very least, click on the link Heather provides to make Yahoo your home page and help support the cause.

Foot or the Internet

2011-06-27T19:26:00.003-04:00

A few days ago, the boys were playing a rousing game of This or That and Peyton asked me, "Would you rather save your foot or the Internet?" I answered almost instantly, "My foot."

However, after turning my computer over last Thursday to a friend to clean up and not getting it back for four days, I may be rethinking my choice. It wasn't so much the goofing off on Facebook that I missed, but I didn't realize how many times a day I consulted the Internet for other things. Answers to questions, paying bills, checking on shipping, etc. And especially my new obsession with saving money while grocery shopping. I actually had to go to Publix over the weekend without checking out Southern Savers first. THE HORROR!

So, what do you think? Would you save your foot or the Internet?

Two Months Old

2011-06-09T16:36:00.004-04:00

Elizabeth aka Ellie Raine, Little Bit, Baby Girl, is definitely more alert. She's full of smiles and likes to boogie.

She's sleeping 5-6 hour stretches at night, feeding and then sleeping another 3-4, so we're progressing nicely in that department. Her doctor told me to move her into her room now to help her sleep longer. He'd probably crap if he knew she wasn't only sleeping in our room, but our bed. Don't want to hear it. She's the baby and my last one.

Miss Personality still has her bad evenings, but I think they're getting better. I find if I can get her to sleep before she's overly tired, it makes things better.

Larry and I have decided that I will stay home (Yay!) and Monday, I gave my resignation to work. It's exciting and scary and a whole other blog post that I may or may not get around to in the near future.

Overall, things are going well and we're plugging along.

In The Last 24 Hours

2011-05-23T18:45:00.004-04:00

Last night, we took Peyton out for ice cream to celebrate his birthday. We were in the shop about 10-15 minutes, but when we returned to the car, it wouldn't start. I have a smart key, which seems cool til you have to use it all the time and then you just wish for a regular key. So anyway, we thought it was a problem with the key not registering as the car was acting funny when only a little bit before it was fine.

I dug through the manual as Larry became more flustered. The boys were a little hyper and then Elizabeth started crying. Mistake number one. ALWAYS BRING THE DIAPER BAG! Even if it is only going to be a quick trip. When after 20 or so minutes, I couldn't find a solution, I went ahead and called our friends to come and get us before there were full meltdowns from my husband and baby.

This morning, I contacted Mazda and the service tech suggested that it may just be the smart key battery that needed replacing. Hoping it was that simple, I headed to Walgreens to buy a battery and then we went back to the car. No such luck. We tried jumping the car. No such luck. Finally, I broke down and called roadside assistance and they sent a tow truck. Thankfully, or so we thought then, they were able to jump the car and get it started and I headed to the local repair shop we use.

After waiting for an hour, the service tech informed me that even though he installed a new battery, the car wasn't holding the charge and he recommended I go to Mazda in case the car was under warranty and it was an electrical issue. By this time, I was starving, so I headed home first.

When I pulled into the cul-de-sac, I noticed there was a car in the driveway. At first I thought it was my father in law and when I saw the car's reverse lights come on, I just pulled to the side to let him out. I quickly realized it wasn't him, especially, when the car basically did a three point turn into my grass in order to pull out forward out of the driveway. I thought it was weird, but thought maybe they were salesmen or Witnesses.

As I was getting out of the car, another car swung around the circle and a lady asked me out her window if I knew the car that was just in my driveway. I walked a little closer as it was so odd and answered no. She told me she was a police officer and I noticed then the uniform. Apparently, they had been watching this car throughout the city. She left then and told me she was going to follow them.

I went inside to talk to Larry about it and not 2 minutes later, the doorbell rang. It was two more uniformed cops asking for information. From what they said, there has been a string of break-ins in our city and this car had raised suspicion, so a dozen undercover cops were following it. Great! They assumed the people had gotten spooked and pulled into our street attempting to lose the cops.

I gave what little statement I could and I thought that would be the end of it.

After grabbing a quick lunch, I headed to Mazda to get a new battery.

Three hours later.

I pulled into my house to yet another strange car. This time, though, no one was inside it. As I opened the door to the house, Larry quickly said, it's ok. It's just a detective. Lovely. This time, I had to actually write my statement down. They had caught up with the car the city north of us and took the three people into custody. With my statement, they were going to charge them with loitering, but the detective said it's not a huge crime, so they would probably be back on the streets tonight.

Thankfully, even though there have been quite a few break-ins, the criminals don't appear to be violent and haven't targeted any houses when the residents were home. Even though I would hate for my things to be stolen, stuff is stuff and I'd rather my family be safe.

I never knew staying at home would be so exciting.

What Peyton Thinks

2011-05-13T19:36:00.002-04:00

I so enjoyed reading Kristin's post about what her kids wrote about her that I thought I would share Peyton's thoughts on me.

Mom, I love it when you: watch Cake Boss with me. (I figure it is better than most shows on Cartoon Network.)

Only I know: that you are smart and an artist. (Apparently, I hide my intelligence well.)

The funniest memory I have of you is when: you pushed me down the water slide when I wasn't looking and got water in my ear. (I don't remember this, but I'm glad he thinks it's funny now.)

And my favorite one that I can't imagine where he got it from (looks innocently around)

Every day I am thankful that you: put a roof over my head and give me food.

Remember, you are: the best mom ever! (Sorry, girls! I win this one.)

Elizabeth: Month One

2011-05-10T20:08:00.004-04:00

Today you turned one month old. How the time is flying already. Everyone is quite taken with you. Smitten, you could even say. Especially, your brothers. They don't walk by without kissing you or touching you.

I'm starting to see signs of a human emerge out of your newborness. Your eyes are clearing and you focus better. I think we'll get a true smile soon.

You have already shown to be quite opinionated and aren't afraid to let us (me) know if you don't like something. I don't think you will have any problem getting the men of the house to bend to your will though, so if you want to tone that down some, I'd appreciate it.

I love you, baby girl.

In the A.M.

2011-05-05T13:15:00.003-04:00

- Waking up at 4:45 a.m. to feed the baby is not so bad. Staying up after that feeding is.

- Baby scooting up your stomach to nuzzle under your neck is not her way of cuddling. She wants to play, or she may be trying to run away from a poopy diaper.

- Watching baby kick one leg repeatedly after changing poopy diaper is pretty cute. Even at 5:15 a.m.

- If you find a position and motion that keeps baby happy at 5:30 a.m., you will stay in that position and do that motion indefinitely. You may even smile.

- If one more ounce is what it takes to put baby back to sleep at 5:45 a.m., GIVE IT TO HER.

- Dogs are not very good company at 5:45 a.m., especially when they start playing with a squeaky toy.

- After somewhat falling back asleep at 6:00 a.m., 6:45 a.m. comes rather quickly.

Annoucing Elizabeth

2011-05-03T08:13:00.004-04:00

When Tiny Prints contacted me regarding their promotion for Holiday cards, I was a little disappointed I had to tell them no, as I had already committed to ordering my cards from Shutterfly. However, when I mentioned that I had a baby due in April, the representative said that I could order 25 announcements from them to try once she was born. I was understandably excited.

When Elizabeth was a day old, the hospital photographer captured her image and mom was so kind to order me a package from them that included 25 announcements. They were so precious and really showcased how tiny Elizabeth was the day after she was born. I quickly went through those 25 and still needed more, so I again contacted Tiny Prints to see if I could still order from them as well. The representative I worked with was super friendly and she sent me the instructions for my free cards.

I began my search for the perfect birth announcement and quickly settled for a simple design that showcased my little beauty.

The announcements arrived very quickly and I was impressed by the quality of the card and the clarity of the photo. Overall, I was happy with my experience with Tiny Prints and I would definitely order from them again.

Two Weeks and Two Days

2011-04-26T07:44:00.005-04:00

Even though she is only two weeks old and her head wobbles unstable on top of her body, I can already feel Elizabeth's body making the transition from newborn to baby. At 1:00 am this morning as I patted her back, willing a burp from her mouth, she felt sturdier, her back broader, just a tad heavier and I tried to sear the memory of her smallness in my brain.

The boys look like giants now. Almost grown. And I've been trying desperately to recall their first days to little avail. I remember moments and I see snapshots in my mind, but they are fleeting and I'm left with gaps in my memory. Peyton pulled out the photo album that showcased his first and second years and I had a brief a-ha as I thought to myself, "Oh, there you are." My chubby faced first born.

As much as I'd like to stay home and watch all my babies, I know I will have to go back to work, at least for a little while. So for now, I am trying to capture every moment, enjoy every sigh and big, baby yawn. And pictures, I'm taking lots and lots of pictures.

Elizabeth Raine

2011-04-11T21:53:00.007-04:00

April 10, 2011
7 lbs. 10 ozs
20.5 inches long.

Happy Birthday, Baby

2011-04-10T02:14:00.002-04:00

Sure as I finished that last day of work, my water broke after we ate lunch on Saturday before we could head to Home Depot. We've been at the hospital since 4ish, epidural around 10 and I think she'll be here within a couple hours.

Getting really excited. Should be sleeping but can't wait to meet this little girl.

Last Day of Work

2011-04-08T15:52:00.002-04:00

While the days have seemed to drag on and on, the weeks and months have flown by and I find myself finishing up my last day of work before leave. Baby girl is officially coming and soon!

Not that I can control this, but it would be nice if she waited till her due date to make her appearence though. I need to finish up some things next week and Peyton has testing and I'd like for him to not be distracted. But as I have no control over that, we shall roll with it as we can.

Our lives are about to change and I know in a month or so, I won't even remember what we did before this new little one entered the world.

Larry and I both would like me to stay home, but I'm not sure we can swing it. This leave will be a test in many ways. On one hand, we've paid off some things, but then on the other hand, we're adding expenses. So, we shall see. Should be interesting all around.

That's about all I've got. Brain is a little mushy. Obviously, your prayers for healthy baby and smooth delivery are wanted. Hopefully, baby pictures will be posted all over the web soon.

Spotlight on: Crazy Mama Creations

2011-03-30T09:25:00.004-04:00

Let's just pretend for a moment that Tamara isn't my best friend, shall we?

While perusing one of my favorite online shops, Etsy, I stumbled upon this great new shop, Crazy Mama Creations. Crazy Mama, aka Tamara, stays at home with her two children and in an effort to keep it that way, as well as spread the joy she has received from up above, Tamara began making these awesome necklaces that showcase words of inspiration derived directly from scripture.

From Tamara's profile: I desire to bring people one step closer to their Maker in incredibly unconventional ways!

This piece grabbed me from first sight:

Being a beach lover, the blues call to me and the stamped image Refresh is well, refreshing.

The handpainted flowers are also darling.

So cute paired with a white tee or tank and jeans or shorts.

So go check out Crazy Mama Creations and show her some love.

Also, if you leave a comment on Tamara's blog post introducing her new store, you'll be entered to win one of her fabulous necklaces.

37 Weeks

2011-03-29T14:25:00.002-04:00

and feeling a bit jittery today. I've felt over the whole pregnancy thing for a while now, but now that I'm actually close to really being done, I've had a bit of nervous anxiety today. As weird as it sounds, it still hasn't set in that I'm having a baby. It just sounds really strange to me. You would think with the crib being set up and the clothes washed, not to mention my ever expanding belly, that I would get it by now. But no. I seem to still be in denial. The whole starting all over thing is throwing me for a loop too.

A baby. What to do with a baby? Tamara can attest that my emails over the last few weeks have centered around a feeling of overwhelmingness (Yes, I made that up). I keep telling myself it will be fine once she gets here and I know it will be. I'm just not used to feeling so strange and out of control. Taking a somewhat unemotional person and throwing her in to the washing machine of hormones is not a pleasant sight nor feeling.

A good night's sleep wouldn't hurt either. Just need to get through the next week and a half of work.

The Boys Room

2011-03-21T19:59:00.005-04:00

My good friend, Tamara, reminded me that I hadn't posted the photos of the boys' room yet. I still need to put something up on the walls, but who knows when I'll get to that. So, without further adieu.

Here's Shey's room before.

And here's the giant bunk bed that takes up almost all the room. Oh well. There's a ton of storage and the boys aren't in there much anyway. The boys really liked this one because there are real step rather than a ladder. Plus, the steps are drawers.

I want to put shelves up sometime to give them space for knick knacks and stuff. Also, they have a couple of posters they want to put on the wall. Maybe the week between when I stop working and my due date, I'll get to that.

The baby's room is scheduled to be painted tomorrow and then I can finally get to the room that started this whole crazy house remodel. Nothing like pushing the time limit.

How much longer?

2011-03-03T14:43:00.002-05:00

I am seriously at the point where I feel like I've been pregnant F.O.R.E.V.E.R. I really don't remember what's it's like not to be pregnant, uncomfortable and in pain. Oh and don't forget exhausted.

Waddle, waddle, waddle.

I am just a bundle of joy to be around (ha! Pun intended)

And we still don't have a name set. I just can't pick one that I really like and it's driving me batty. The boys were so easy. I don't know why this is giving me such fits.

After this week, only five more weeks of work. Thank the Good Lord.

Wake me when it's time to go to the hospital.

Dreamin' of Baby

2011-02-21T15:12:00.002-05:00

It's no secret that being pregnant can bring out the crazy in your dreams and last night was no exception.

I dreamed baby girl was head down, but had reached her arms out and was basically giving me a hug from hip to hip. I could feel her hands gripping my sides and when I looked down, my skin was so thin, I could actually see her little fingers. I'm not sure who I was talking to, but I pointed it out to them. Then my skin peeled a little (not gross, just like a sunburn) and I could touch her hand. In my dream, I thought, "Huh, that's pretty neat." ha ha

She likes my right hip and I feel her there quite often throughout the day. I think she's diagonal a lot because I'll also feel a foot or something in my left rib. I don't remember feeling the boys in my hip, so it's a little weird.

Time is starting to move quicker now. It seemed like it took forever to make it from 25 to 30 weeks and now we're already at 32. My shower's in a couple weeks and then they'll be the mad dash to paint the room and get the laundry done and put away.

It's funny, as much as I DO NOT like being pregnant, it's still a little bittersweet that this is the last time I will be. I will miss feeling her move around and knowing she's as safe as I can keep her. I'm trying to enjoy it, but holy cow, I'm uncomfortable and really ready for the weeks to move on by. Everyone keeps telling me I'm not even that big and all I can say is Thank God, quite literally. I would not be a pleasant person to be around if I'd ballooned.

31 Weeks

2011-02-16T18:39:00.004-05:00

Only 9 (or hopefully 7) weeks to go. (And no, there's no indication I'll go early, just wishful thinking on my part.)

For Chelle: Ask and you shall receive. . .

Precious Moments

2011-02-14T15:11:00.002-05:00

As many of you know, on Friday, the 4th, Larry and I took the boys to view their little sister in 3D. Oh, Peyton, as to be expected, was less than thrilled with the prospect as he wanted to go to a friend's house instead. I, though, was bound a determined to make it a family event. Peyton was too little when I had Shey's 3D ultrasound done and I think Larry was at work, so I was all alone at the viewing. Knowing this is our last child, and the boys being the age they are, I wanted everyone to be there. I had an image in my mind, a sweet family affair, pictures on a screen that would help make this more real for them and even for me.

We arrived at the 3D site right on time and as we were the only ones there, were taken right back. I had drank a coke on the way over to insure Baby Girl would be awake and moving. The room was large and the company had a projector screen on the wall so everyone could see.

Needless to say, though, the event wasn't wrapped in a haze of perfectness like in my daydreams.

Shey was definitely more interested in jumping around in front of the screen casting shadows than actually watching the event. Larry was on the couch across the room from me, so although I'm sure he enjoyed the show, I didn't feel very close to him. Baby girl had her arm in front of her face for the first few minutes and then she face planted into her placenta for the next 10. (That still kinda grosses me out, natural as it may be. EWWWWWW) The tech pushed and prodded and tried to tilt baby's head in order to caption some good shots. And we did get those awww shots, the experience just didn't quite match. ;)

With all that going on, it was Peyton who made the experience so precious to me. The boy who I believe someday may be the death of me, was the sweetest one that night.

He laid down beside me on the bed and we watched his little sister move and smile with our fingers entwined. And while, I'll never forget seeing that baby girl on the screen, I'll always treasure the memory of my oldest child's warm body next to mine.

House Remodel Phase 1

2011-02-03T18:22:00.004-05:00

Our house has zero storage. Apparently, this is a common problem in Florida. We don't have basements, no real need for coat closets and attics are sweltering places and in our house, really hard to reach. With all this, our first major project was adding more cabinet space. Our front room, dubbed the playroom, was just a big wasted room for the most part. The kids rarely went in there, the couch stunk (literally) and the TV was on the fritz.

We found a company online that made custom cabinetry and they gave us a good price, so we filled the whole back wall with full height cabinets. We gave the couch and entertainment unit to Faith Farm and ditched the TV. We were given a gift card to Best Buy for the holidays, so we were able to get a new flat screen and we know this great handyman who does stuff like this for really reasonable. Also, we picked up a couple of recliners at El Dorado and the table was from Target. Now, we all want to hang out in here with the comfy chairs and new TV.

Now, we have plenty of storage for the kids' toys, which enabled us to put them in a room together, as well as all our books and DVDs have a home rather than the gym closet. My scrapbooking stuff and Larry's whole huge collection of baseball cards and paraphernalia also have a place to go.

Next up, the boys' new room . . .

Thinking

2011-01-27T08:23:00.002-05:00

A couple of days ago, I finished up The Potluck Club, Book 1 by Linda Shepherd. It was entertaining enough. Not a great novel by any means, but it held my attention and passed the time.

There was one theme though that struck a chord with me and it's been weighing on my mind. It seems right now in my life, more than any other time I can remember, I'm caught up in the cycle of birth and death. Obviously, birth is on my mind with the arrival of this baby girl getting closer and closer. But it's not just me. A couple of girlfriends and I were conversing and we've discovered that just over 10% of our graduating class is pregnant right now. (Well, we were, one friend had her baby earlier this week.) And at least two of us have had babies over the past 6 months. That's a lot of births.

On top of that, everywhere I look, there are pregnant women. At least two co-workers are pregnant, a co-worker's wife and my friend, Amanda is also expecting. Babies are coming in every which direction. A baby boom of the modern age.

Juxtaposed to all the births though is death. I am getting to the age, and my friends along with me, where people we love are reaching their time to move into the next life. My Mammaw hasn't been doing so well these last few months, moving in and out of being in the now. My dearest friend, Tamara, is living through this as well with her grandparents. A dear, Godly family that I grew up with is in the midst of losing their father and husband from brain cancer. And as I posted a few days ago, a former classmate, Sara is now beginning her battle with Stage 4 colon cancer.

Birth and Death. We rejoice at the births, but being the humans we are, we find it hard to celebrate the deaths. We are selfish beings and it's hard to lose those we love.

Back to The Potluck Club. One of the characters is diagnosed with cancer in the novel and she and another character discuss healing. The character with cancer is a pastor's wife and she discusses the five types of healing. Four of the types most of us could come up with.

The first type is our body's natural healing process. Anti-bodies and such that fight off those bad germs that float around.

The second type is miraculous. God touching the afflicted with his hand and without explanation of modern science or medicine, the person is healed.

The third type is the medical profession. The doctors and nurses who spend years studying and then countless hours working to heal the sick.

The fourth type is a healing of the spirit. When you accept your ailment, grow and learn.

The fifth though, is hard to accept for most people, but in actuality may be God's greatest gift.

Death.

For those that are so ill they can no longer function. When quality of life is gone. When your body is so tired, you just want to rest. God then steps in and gives us death. The ultimate healing. One that results in a new body and life that's not burdened with the troubles of this world.

It's so, so hard for those of us left behind to not be saddened by the loss of a loved one. But looking at death from this perspective may just give an ounce of peace and comfort. Lately, I've talked to quite a few of my friends and we'll all say, "Getting old sucks." But maybe it doesn't so much. It's a lot to take in, but in an effort of continuing my walk with God, maybe I should start looking at getting old as a blessing, rather than a curse.

28 Weeks and the Tri-mesters

2011-01-25T19:02:00.004-05:00

The tri-mesters in layman's terms:

First:

Holy crap, I'm what?
Oh, I don't feel so good.
Bed, sweet, sweet bed.
Good grief, I'm bloated.

Second:

This pregnancy thing is pretty cool.
oooohhhh, just felt the baby kick.
Clean, clean, clean, clean.
We're having a baby! Wheeeeeee!!!

Third:

I'm so fat!
Can't. Roll. Over.
Ow, that was my rib.

But mostly, I am so ready to meet this little girl.

The Match

2011-01-24T09:19:00.004-05:00

It was set to be a match-up of Epic proportions. The number one and number two seed pitted together on a blustery Saturday morning. Both teams were undefeated; however, they had only wins and we had one draw. After coming off an easy victory of 10-0 last week, our kids were a little lackadaisical, appearing almost sluggish on the field. We were missing one of our best forwards and the kids were going to have to work hard to pick up the slack.

The first half was tense. The ball hovered around our goal for almost the entire time, causing our defenders to work extra hard. Our goal keeper was on point though and saved us again and again. The score remained 0-0 almost until halftime till unfortunately two goals got through and we found ourselves down 2-0.

Our players are tough though and that was the motivation we needed. A fire was lit under their butts and we were out for blood. Despite many a call against our team and not very many against theirs, we finally managed to score a goal. Our spirits began to raise and the boys began gunning for more.

Our coach noticed that in an effort to protect their win, the black team had all but two players defending their goal. This would prove to be their downfall. During the second half, the ball stayed near their goal and our forwards made strike after strike. Unfortunately, they didn't go in, but we were now in the zone.

We were finally able to score a goal and tie up the game. While I breathed a sigh of relief, our coach was adamant he wanted "More! More!" and the team began working to grant him his wish.

With less than five minutes left, one of our defenders made an amazing stop and booted the ball to the other end of the field. Our midfielders quickly picked it up and began passing it up to get within striking range. With a mighty kick, the ball went in the goal!

The roar from the crowd would rival that heard round Toomer's Corner not too long ago. A parent frantically asked the ref, "How much time?" and three minutes was the reply. For a long 180 seconds, our defenders worked to protect our goal. Finally, the sweet sound of the whistle blast ended the game. We WON!

The parents were beside themselves, the kids were grinning from ear to ear and the coach was bursting with pride.

Our boys had held it together, even though they were short a couple of players, and had fallen down by two goals. They dug deep and came up with a win. A win that was well deserved and hard fought.

It appears now though that we will have a rather large target on our backs and I think we are just fine with that.

Second Verse

2011-01-19T10:24:00.003-05:00

I successfully memorized my first verse of the 24 Bible verses in 12 months challenge:

For the Lord your God is with you. He is Mighty to Save. He will take delight in You. He will quiet you with his love. He will rejoyce over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

This verse is a bit easier to remember, but still a great reminder nonetheless and one I'm sure I will need to refer to more and more over the coming months and years as we add another little one to the family and the boys quickly approach their teenage years (or so it seems)

34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34

For Tamara:

Light up the Sky by The Afters

When I’m feeling all alone and so far to go
The signs are nowhere on this road guiding me home
When the night is closing in
It’s falling on my skin
Oh God will You come close

Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me
I, I, I can’t deny
Oh I can’t deny that You are right here with me
You’ve opened my eyes so I can see You all around me
Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me

When stars are hiding in the clouds
I don’t feel them shining
When I can’t see beyond my doubt
The silver lining
When I’ve almost reached the end
Like a flood You’re rushing in
Love is rushing in

Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me
I, I, I can’t deny
Oh I can’t deny that You are right here with me
You’ve opened my eyes so I can see You all around me
Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me

So I run straight to Your arms
You’re the bright and morning Sun
To show Your love, there’s nothing You won’t do

Light, light, light up the sky
You light up the sky to show me You are with me
I, I, I can’t deny
Oh I can’t deny that You are right here with me
You’ve opened my eyes so I can see You all around me
Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me

Heavy Heart

2011-01-14T10:32:00.002-05:00

About a month ago, my friend, Carrie, posted an entry about a former achool mate of ours, Sara, who had just lost her baby due to stillbirth. Obviously, I was touched and I think even more so because she has two young boys already and the precious one she lost was a girl. I just couldn't even imagine.

We then learned that through other testing, they had found a spot on her liver and she was scheduled for a CT scan. This morning, I learned through another school mate that the spot was malignant and there are also abnormalities on her colon. Now Sara is set for a colonoscopy and scheduled to get those results next Thursday, which is also her birthday. She was a grade below us, so I'm guessing she is turning 33.

33

Even though I may say I feel old, 33 is still really so young. Especially to have cancer. It's awful for anyone to be diagnosed, but it just particularly painful to see a young mother experiencing the horribleness of the disease.

My heart just hurts for Sara, her husband, those two little boys and her family.

I didn't know her well at all in high school, but she always had this true demeanor about her. One of genuine niceness and tender heartedness. She was quiet and kind and I seriously doubt partakes in the offenses of this world that one would think of when linked to cancer. She will definitely be on my heart and in my prayers.

She's a Maniac

2011-01-06T09:36:00.005-05:00

To say that I've now lost all good sense is an understatement. But, I'm pregnant and my hormones are whacked out, so let's just roll with it. Mmmmkay?

Wheeeeeeee!!!!!!

So, we needed (wanted) a small little itty bitty table to put at our front entry. The area isn't huge and we thought it would be nice to have just a little something there with maybe a picture or mirror on the wall above. We've looked a couple of places, but most long tables are wider than 12" and we really didn't want to go more than that. No sense in harming our guests as they walk in the door.

The need (want) was there. I've always liked building things. Home Depot is right up the house and they sell lumber. What else was I to do? So I built (attempted to build) a table. I looked at a cool website, Knocked off Wood, written by a SAHM, who builds things for cheap that look like expensive pieces you would find in Pottery Barn, Ballard Designs, etc. She has tools and a square and a level and more than half a brain. Most importantly, her furniture looks good and she makes it look easy.

I can do this, I thought!

Shey and I headed to Home Depot. I selected my 1x4s and 1x3s and 1x2s all based off an idea in my head and scribbles on Post it notes.

Did you know Home Depot will cut your lumber for you? The nice guy working told me that they are only supposed to give you two cuts for free and then charge you $.50 for the remaining cuts, but he took one look into my beautiful (crazy) brown eyes and made all 50 bazillion of my cuts for free.

$40 worth of wood, $8.00 for the screws and $12 worth of sandpaper later, we headed home. And yes, by this time, I realized I probably could have found a little table for this much without all the hassle, but I was a woman on a mission. I was going to build a table, dang it.

Bless my husband. When I got home and he saw the pieces of lumber, he just smiled and helped his delusional wife into the house with it.

Well, about an hour into my project, I realized I had no idea what I was doing. There's actually a reason that a square is needed and plans are helpful. My measurements were off and it really didn't look anything in person like it did in my head. I told Larry as much and he said, well, too bad we can't all live in your head. We laughed and then he posted that incriminating photo of me in all my crazy glory on Facebook.

I left my project there for a bit. Not sure if it was salvageable or not. I really hated to waste all that wood, but I was at a loss. About an hour later, I decided to do what I could to at least make it look like a table, which meant giving it a top and the ability to stand alone.

Funny, the boys thought it was cool and told me so. They thought I had done a splendid job on my table.

At this point, I was a little tired and disappointed, but inspiration struck again. What if we cut off the bottom, as the structure (or sculpture as Larry called it)was a little tall and then I covered it with fabric? Then no one would see the odd angles and mismatched legs and I wouldn't have to sand the thing. Bonus!

This was the plan until my friend Shannon and her husband came over for dinner. She looked the table over and deemed it "Not bad." Shannon is pretty honest and I knew she wouldn't lead me astray. She offered some decorating ideas and told me to go for it.

Recharged, I went to Home Depot again, bought some stain and began once again. A few days later, Shannon headed with me to Home Goods and we picked up the necessary accessories to transform my entrance into a Foy-yay. I still need something for the wall behind the area, I'm thinking a piece of wall art, but overall, I'm happy with the results and I built it myself!

-

Eternal

2011-01-06T09:35:00.001-05:00

by Sanctus Real

I know this life I lead will pass away
Along with every other earthly thing
So I will set my heart on a higher plain
Where my treasure lies with You

And in this marriage of our hearts
There is no death do us part
For You are eternal
And I am eternally Yours

And I could never lose Your love to sickness
Oh I could never lose You to divorce
And there's no concept of abandonment
For I am safe within Your arms

And in this marriage of our hearts
There is no death do us part
For You are eternal
And I am eternally Yours
Oh I am eternally Yours
I am eternally Yours
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com

(No abandonment)
(Safe within Your arms)

I never had enough until I found You
I never knew love until I met You
I never had enough until I found You
And now I have everything

And in this marriage of our hearts
There is no death do us part
For You are eternal
And I am eternally Yours
And I am eternally Yours
Oh I am eternally Yours

I could never lose You
No I will never lose You
I could never lose You

And this life will pass away
But You will never change
Oh this life will pass away
Oh but You will never change

Mighty to Save is one of my favorite songs, especially to sing in church, so when I saw the verse as I was flipping through the comments on The Siesta Scripture Memory Verse Day 1, I knew that was to be my first verse as well.

“The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17 NIV

25 Weeks

2011-01-04T17:17:00.003-05:00

Excuse the baggy pants. I didn't feel like wearing my maternity pants, so these are Larry's jeans that are too big for him.

I think we can safely say that I look pregnant now. I think I can thank all the ice cream and German Chocolate Cake I ate at mom's house over the holidays. I can't believe I only have 3 to 3 1/2 months left. CRAZY!

Blogger Love

2011-01-04T11:01:00.002-05:00

I just happened to stumble across a new blog to read as I was perusing the comments on The Pioneer Woman's photography post about black and white photos and I'm so glad I did. I normally don't look at the comments, but Ree was asking for B/W editing advice and I'm always keen on reading about photography, even if I don't get to actually take photos as much as I would like to.

One commenter mentioned The Coffee Shop Blog and her creamychocolate B/W action for Photoshop and Photoshop Elements. I followed the link expecting to find a site that offered actions for a price. I was so happy to find that all the actions The Coffee Shop offers are FREE! Yes, FREE! Plus, she has a ton of tutorials and other good stuff for making your photography better.

I use The Pioneer Woman's action Boost on almost all my photos, and I'm excited to download some of The Coffee Shops' to try out too.

Check her out!

Whew

2011-01-03T10:35:00.003-05:00

Today, I feel every day of being six months pregnant. Yesterday, Larry, his brother and I worked in the house from the time we got up (10 am woohoo for late sleep in) till 9:00 last night starting the first phase of Making Room for Baby. The furniture was removed from both the boys rooms, some set aside, some set outside and at least 5 trash bags were filled. I'm not sure if my boys are hoarders in the making, or just lazy. I think it's a bit of both.

Well, Shey is lazy. His room was pretty easy. I sat in there while he came in and out and just threw things away when he wasn't looking. Even when he did pay attention, he was pretty agreeable to dumping things not needed. His room was mostly cleared and we were able to paint it last night. It now awaits the bunk bed we ordered last week before we can really go any further.

Oh, Peyton. He does love to hold on to some stuff. Papers, namely. Some cool picture that a friend made. A cut out animal that looks to be on its last leg. Thankfully, he let us chunk the collection of dried lizards he had accumulated. His room still has piles of stuff to go through, but I just ran out of steam. Larry wants Peyton to go through it again, but I think I'm going to see if I can sneak in there and just do it myself. So much more will get done. I mean, seriously, if it's been at the bottom of a toy box for months, do you really need it? I honestly don't know how we are going to fit all of it into one room. They will definitely have to be more conscious of actually throwing things away rather than just cramming junk under a dresser.

I took photos, but I'm waiting for rooms to near completion, so I can post a room transformation all at once. This should hopefuly start happening in the next couple of weeks. I hope so, my aching hips can't take much more.

***Edited to clarify: Wow, you guys are concerned about the dried lizards. ha We have geckos everywhere down here and sometimes the baby ones will get in the house and if I don't find them or usher them out, a lot of times they will die and then shrivel up. Okay, that is gross, but not really as gross as it writes. So, that's the story behind the lizards.

A Reminder

2010-12-29T16:41:00.002-05:00

One day I will edit the photos of Peyton hating the camera on Christmas morning and post them, but for now I saw this on Clover Lane and had to share. As we gear up to totally remodel the house to accomodate baby girl, I sometimes find myself wondering, why are we doing this again?! Here's a nice reminder:

From an Erma Bombeck Column:

A young mother writes: "I know you've written before about the empty-nest syndrome -- that lonely period after the children are grown and gone. Right now, I'm up to my eyeballs in laundry and muddy boots. The baby is teething; the boys are fighting. My husband just called and said to eat without him, and I fell off my diet. Lay it on me again, will you?"

OK.

One of these days, you'll shout, "Why don't you kids grow up and act your age!"
And they will.

Or, "You guys get outside and find yourselves something to do ... and don't slam the door!"
And they won't.

You'll straighten up the boys' bedroom neat and tidy -- bumper stickers discarded, bedspread tucked and smooth, toys displayed on the shelves. Hangers in the closet. Animals caged. And you'll say out loud, "Now I want it to stay this way."
And it will.

You'll prepare a perfect dinner with a salad that hasn't been picked to death and a cake with no finger traces in the icing, and you'll say, "Now, there's a meal for company."
And you'll eat it alone.

You'll say: "I want complete privacy on the phone. No dancing around. No demolition crews. Silence! Do you hear?" And you'll have it.

No more plastic tablecloths stained with spaghetti.
No more bedspreads to protect the sofa from damp bottoms.
No more gates to stumble over at the top of the basement steps.
No more clothespins under the sofa.
No more playpens to arrange a room around.

No more anxious nights under a vaporizer tent.
No more sand on the sheets or Popeye movies in the bathrooms.
No more iron-on patches, wet, knotted shoestrings, tight boots, or rubber bands for ponytails.

Imagine. A lipstick with a point on it. No baby sitter for New Year's Eve. Washing only once a week. Seeing a steak that isn't ground. Having your teeth cleaned without a baby on your lap.

No PTA meetings.
No car pools.
No blaring radios.
No one washing her hair at 11 o'clock at night.
Having your own roll of Scotch tape.

Think about it. No more Christmas presents out of toothpicks and library paste.
No more sloppy oatmeal kisses.
No more tooth fairy.
No giggles in the dark.
No knees to heal, no responsibility.

Only a voice crying, "Why don't you grow up?"

and the silence echoing, "I did."

To Believe or Not to Believe

2010-12-15T11:08:00.004-05:00

Christmas falling on Saturday is really messing me up this year. We are traveling to Alabama this Sunday and then plan on heading back the following Sunday. I was thinking how difficult it would be to make the kids wait the whole week to open their gifts, just to pack up that afternoon to leave the next day. Mom and I talked about it and we agreed that we would just celebrate Christmas on Thursday. And I said these exact words, "It's not like the kids will know the exact date anyway."

Silly me. I keep forgetting Peyton is in third grade and not quite as clueless as his five year old brother. Who, now that I think about it, probably knows Christmas falls on Saturday too as I'm sure they are discussing it in class. But still, I didn't think about it, because, hey! presents! three days early!

So this morning on the way to school, Peyton was asking if we could stay in Alabama a few extra days basically for the reason above. I laughed and said, "well, I thought we could have Christmas on Thursday. I didn't realize you would know the date." He just looked at me like I was the clueless one and said, "Mom, I'm not dumb." Point taken.

We talked some more and then he says the following, "So, can we open your gifts on Thursday and then Santa will bring his gifts on Saturday?" This, coming from the boy who has told me that Santa's not real and even taunted his brother with this knowledge as well. I looked at him to see if he was joking or covering up for Shey, but he was serious. I really wasn't sure how to handle it. Did I use that time to finally squelch the belief in Santa, or so I now play along and strengthen this new belief?

I hem and hawed a bit and said that maybe Santa would make a special trip for us on Wednesday night. Now, though, I'm thinking we'll just hold one gift back and Santa can come on Saturday as he's supposed to.

If I haven't said it enough, Peyton is such a unique child. I know they all are, but he just takes it to a whole new level. I mean, seriously, he can't decide what he wants to do or believe, it's no wonder he's so frustrated all the time. Sometimes he seems so grown up and he has since he was a baby, but then other times, the little boy in him comes out and I'm not sure how to handle it. I guess I need to treasure it especially as he's getting older and that little one will show up less and less often. Oh, that boy.

*Edited to add: I just glanced at the Christmas card I chose and hello, there's my answer. You'll see soon, as they went in the mail today. :)

And by the way, I have 10 cards left over, so if I have any lurkers out there who want to exchange cards, let me know and I'll send one out.

This is my Son

2010-12-08T15:58:00.002-05:00

Early this morning about 3:30, Peyton came into our room and said, "You know how I have to watch Shey throughout the night? Well, he just fell off the bed." I didn't hear any noise coming from Shey's room, but I followed Peyton in there anyway and sure enough Shey was lying there whimpering on the bed. I rubbed his leg a bit and climbed in bed with the both of them and after Shey drifted off to sleep I went back to my bed.

Then I started thinking about what Peyton had said. Not just simply, "Shey fell out of the bed," but "I have to watch him throughout the night." It's humorous because, really, we've never once asked Peyton to check on Shey throughout the night. Shey doesn't have some condition where he needs to be checked on throughout the night and if he did, we wouldn't ask Peyton to do it. And, also, as far as I know, Peyton doesn't get up throughout the night to check on his brother. He does get up to use the restroom and then come to our room, but to check on Shey, I don't think so.

But that's Peyton. There's always a reason for everything and it is generally in his favor or makes him look good. He definitely an interesting child, one that can't really be explained without spending some time with him.

Mom bought me Setting Limits for your Strong Willed Child and I started reading it last night during Peyton's soccer practice. Thank God, he does not act out in the manner of some of the children documented in the book, but he definitely carries the traits of a strong willed child. While Shey is a natural pleaser, Peyton likes to test and push.

The book is very easy to read and offers good sound advice without asking the parent to come up with these elaborate rewards systems and charts that you can never keep up with. A phrase that stuck in my head last night from the book was "you [the parent] are not the problem, but you can be a big part of the solution." The book explains the whys of your child's behaviour, how you shouldn't take it personally when they test and argue. If you are able to do so and not see their actions as an attack, then you can remain calm and handle the behaviour accordingly. The author emphasizes that the strong willed child will continue to test, but over time and consistency, they will learn to tune into your words and respond accordingly.

I'll be honest, this is the first child rearing book that I've actually started reading and plan on finishing. It's not overwhelming and it just makes sense. I'm looking forward to completing the book and implementing the techniques provided.

Halfway There!

2010-12-01T15:00:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I hit the halfway mark of the pregnancy. Wow. I still can't believe I am pregnant most the time. It's just weird. Since I've started feeling better, the weeks are just flying by and I know with the holidays, they will continue to do so. It's so funny to me how a couple of weeks ago, all I felt were flutters and now just two weeks later, the kicks and rolls are setting in. I've even been able to feel Baby Girl on the outside occasionally if my hand is in the right place. We've also started the process of rearranging the house for this little one. Not even born yet and she's already taking over. :) I'm excited to do the nursery though, if we can ever get to that point.

I'm horrible at taking my own photo, but here's half a belly shot.

Let Your Shutterfly!

2010-11-29T15:23:00.007-05:00

While I always stress about getting a decent photo of the boys for our annual Holiday card, I always love capturing that great shot being able to mail them out. And I especially love receiving them from my friends and family. I set the cards up throughout the living room and often leave them there well past the Holidays. Since my mom so generously gave me her Canon SLR camera, I am particularly excited this year and hope to score a great photo.

And now with the help of Shutterfly offering 50 FREE cards to bloggers, I'm going to attack this year's cards with vigour.

As our family is a mixed bag of Christmas and Hannukah, I especially like Shutterfly's Holiday Cards. Oooh, like this one . . .

And while I generally give my grandmothers photo books, I was thinking about putting together a Wall Calendar this year to mix it up. Here's an example. . .

In April, after Baby Girl is born, I will definitely be checking out their selection of Birth Announcements. Doesn't this make your heart melt . . .

I am so excited to use this opportunity to check out Shutterfly's huge selection of cards and creating gifts to treasure for years to come.

It's a Girl!

2010-11-23T10:59:00.004-05:00

I've wanted a baby girl for so long, that I'm not sure what to think now that I have a little one growing inside of me. Going into the ultrasound yesterday, I was sure I wouldn't be surprised either way. I had felt it was a girl. I thought a girl would be a great addition to our family, but on the other hand, I have two boys and just thought chances were that this would also be a boy. Like I told mom and Tamara, I felt a girl would be best for our family, but what if God didn't agree? Obviously, I've been praying for a healthy baby, but I will admit, I would have been just a bit disappointed to never have the chance to mother a daughter.

When the ultrasound tech was able to get a perfect shot of her girlie bits, I was a little in shock. Even I could tell it was a girl, so clear was that shot.

And what a showoff she was. I've never felt her move so much as she did in the ultrasound. Wiggling around, on her head (literally), sucking her thumb and one time, I swear she waved. She was kicking so much, the tech felt her move. At one point, she got on her hands and knees and was kicking backwards, like she was exercising.

And now all the new emotions set in. A daughter. What will I do with a daughter? Boys, I'm starting to get them, but a girl is a new ballgame. (see, boy reference!)
I'm excited and feel very blessed.

Cure International

2010-11-18T09:41:00.003-05:00

Living in the United States, it is often hard to imagine the difficulties other parts of the world face every day. Brant Hanson with Way FM is in Afghanistan now helping raise awareness for Cure International, a hospital in that area that provides care for the Afghan people that wouldn't receive it otherwise. Specifically at this time, Brant and Way FM are helping to raise money to cover a year's worth of pre and post natal care for the Afghan women and safe delivery for their babies.

Even in this time of recession and difficulties, we are still so blessed. Obviously, this has an additional meaning for me right now as I know that I can call my ob for any problems I may have big or small. I know that when the time comes, I will be in a hospital and Lord willing, this baby will be delivered safely with the best medical care there is. The women in Afghanistan don't have this luxury.

If you are so inclined, click on one of those links above and read about their hardships. And then see how only $65 will provide care for the mother and $125 provides care and a safe delivery. And imagine these women, who are often told horrible things about Americans, receiving this gift from one.

Even if you can't give, stop for a minute and offer up a prayer for the work that Cure is doing.

Make Your Own Laundry Detergent

2010-11-16T10:31:00.003-05:00

I've begun a quest to save money where we can. Larry and I have been more conscious about bringing our lunches to work and eating dinner at home. I've clipped some coupons, even though I haven't actually used any yet. I'm trying to pay more towards our credit cards every month trying to get them down. I'm really working towards the goal of staying home after the baby is born, or at least trying to cut my hours some.

Along this same line, when I saw Chickens in the Road's recipe for Making Your Own Laundry Detergent, I was intrigued. I always hate spending that $12 to $15 dollars on laundry detergent, which is basically glorified soap. After I read the ingredients, I thought it was even better because it's simple and I figure I can use it on the baby's clothes as well instead of spending more money on separate detergent.

I purchased the ingredients a few weeks ago at Publix. They were all in the laundry detergent aisle and easy to find if you are looking for them.

1 regular (not large bath-size) bar of plain soap
1 cup Borax
1/2 cup washing soda
1/2 cup baking soda
water

I should have paid more attention to how much the individual items cost to compare, but I didn't. I don't remember being mortified though and the boxes are so big, I'll be able to use it for a long, long time.

The directions were easy to follow (I made the concentrate) and within 20 minutes or so, I had a coffee can full of laundry detergent. Now, even though the mixture is a liquid when it is warm, once it cools it thickens and honestly, becomes the consistency of snot. Nice, I know.

I initially used the measuring cup that came with my last detergent, but I'm going to look for a scoop with a handle so I don't have to spoon the stuff into the cup before putting it in the machine.

I was so enthralled with measuring out my own detergent, that I forgot to add fabric softener to the first few loads, which may have been for the better for the initial tests as there were no extra smells to masked the detergent. Everything just came out smelling clean and fresh. So, yay, it was a success.

And with the ingredients left over still in the box, I probably have enough to make, well, I don't know, a lot more detergent. I'm going to try and keep track of how long this batch lasts me.

If anyone else has any tips for saving money, I am all ears!

**Edited to add: If you're not too crazy about making liquid detergent, I also found a couple of recipes for powder. It's basically one part of all the incredients mixed up really well. That's easy enough and I may do that for the next batch.

Shellac Nails by CND

2010-11-12T15:21:00.004-05:00

My fingernails have always given me grief. They are flimsy, take forever to grow and don't hold polish for anything. About a month and a half ago, I went into a new salon for a pedicure and noticed a brocure for Shellac nail polish by CND. I had heard about this before, but hadn't been in a salon where they actually utilized the new technology. I went back 4 weeks ago to try it out.

The process is really simple and much like a regular manicure. There's no filing of your nails like with acrylics or gels. The only difference is that in between coats, you place your nails under a UV light for about a minute or so. That's all.

Here is a picture of my nails on Tuesday.

Ta Da! They still look almost as good as the day I received the manicure, except for the growth at the bottom of my nail and if I would have picked a lighter color, that wouldn't even be that obvious. My nails have held up better than ever and actually have some length on them now. I'm finally going today to have them done again because I can't take the growth anymore. It's like a reverse French manicure.

In reading reviews, the average cost is $10 more dollars than a regular manicure. My salon charges $30, which is normally more than I would spend, but since it lasted a whole month, it was worth it. Especially with the holidays coming up. I love having nice nails without the damage of acrylics.

CND didn't compensate me for this review, but if they'd like to send something my way, that would be cool.

17 Weeks

2010-11-09T08:45:00.004-05:00

So, here's the belly. Don't mind the stretch marks, courtesy of Shey or the flat butt, courtesy of my mom. :) I should post a picture of my boobs. Hello! One of my coworkers yesterday commented, "Wow, your boobs have really gotten big." So much for my reduction. Oh well.

Second Play Off Game

2010-11-08T11:25:00.002-05:00

Well, our poor little Orioles were pitted against, I believe to be, an undefeated team yesterday afternoon and needless to say, we were not able to beat them either. Rumor had it, all but two of the players are also on traveling leagues, so these kids are always at the ballfield.

Their first batter hit a long drive to left field and was able to get all the way home before we got the ball back in the infield. And that's about how the day went. We tried our hardest, but by the 4th inning, they were up 14 to 4, so the game was called.

It's so nice though, our guys were ok when the game was over. No tears or kicking and screaming and the parents gave them a standing O for their hard work. We have another game tonight. Hopefully, since we drop to the loser's bracket, we'll be a little better matched up.

First Playoff Game

2010-11-04T09:56:00.002-04:00

I'll be channeling my best budders, Tamara today (on her Birthday, no less) to tell you guys about Peyton's baseball team's first playoff game.

Peyton plays rec ball for the city and their team is the Orioles. Tuesday night, they were slated to play the Mets for their first play-off game. This is the first time Peyton has been old enough to have a play-off game, so I wasn't sure what to expect. Apparently, it is very official and serious! Well, we had an actual adult umpire and the Mets' coaches sure were serious. Arguing with the ump when they thought he made a bad call. Telling their kids to stay on base even when they were called out. I thought it was pretty humorous myself.

Honestly, I thought Peyton's team had a 50/50 chance of winning this game. Their playing has been hit or miss all season (no pun intended). There are some really talented kids on the team, but they can't always pull it together. We had played the Mets a couple of weeks ago and they beat us then, so my hopes weren't too high.

We were actually playing really well. Getting some good outs and hitting ok, but we just couldn't get many runs in. At the top of the last inning, the Mets were up by three. Our first two batters weren't the strongest hitters and they quickly got out. We thought the game was over. The little boy who batted third, well, this is his first year playing, so he never really gets a good hit. Funny enough, if he does make contact though, it's such a short hit, he can usually get on base, which is exactly what happened this time.

And then our little guys that can hit seemed to be in the line up one after the other. Hit after hit, out past the outfield and runners started coming in. Peyton, I am proud to say, was able to get two runners in with his hit. Before we knew it, the kids had tied it up. Our parents were on their feet and the boys could feel the excitement. Two more batters got up and two more runs were brought in and the inning was called. (Only 5 runs per inning)

We were up by TWO!

Now the nerve wracking part. The bottom of the inning. Oh, it's so wrong to wish a child poorly, but when I saw their first batter, I had a little twinge of excitement. He had not done well the whole game and this at bat was no exception. He struck out.

With the next batter, the crack of the bat brought a little fear into my heart, but our little bitty shortstop jumped with his glove in the air and SMACK caught the ball. Two outs!

The third hit was an easy one to the right infield which was snagged by the second baseman and a quick throw to first was the third out.

We had won the game!

We could have won the World Series with all the cheering going on. It was so much fun and the boys were so excited. Like they finally got it. Oh, this is what winning is about!

Our next game is Saturday morning and I hope they can bring this excitement with them.

16 Weeks

2010-11-02T20:02:00.004-04:00

Moving Right Along . . .

Watch what you say... tiny bones forming in baby's ears mean the little one can now pick up your voice. Eyebrows, lashes and hair are starting to fill in, and taste buds are forming. And, if you're interested, an ultrasound might be able to determine gender.

We go in just under 3 weeks to see if Little One is a girl or boy.

Prayer Request

2010-10-28T13:45:00.003-04:00

I was going to write a whole entry about my Mammaw, but I don't think I have the mental or hormonal strength to do so right now. So instead, I'm just asking for prayers for her and my mom. For those of you who don't know, Mammaw has been in a nursing home for sometime now and mom let me know that due to her inability to swallow effectively, they are switching her to puree food. If they can't get this to work, they'll then put her on a feeding tube.

With mom being an only child and me down here in Florida, she is handling this basically on her own. Please pray for her strength.

15 Weeks

2010-10-26T08:53:00.005-04:00

Your Baby: Week 15
Continuing the march towards normal proportions, baby's legs now outmeasure the arms. And, finally, all four limbs have functional joints. Your fetus is squirming and wiggling like crazy down in the womb, though you probably still can't feel the movements.

I have a regular apppointment this afternoon. Please send up a little prayer that baby's heartbeat sounds good.

Can You Feel the Heat?

2010-10-25T14:50:00.003-04:00

Nehemiah. Now that's a book of the Old Testament that I don't ever think about, much less study. It is, however, the story that Pastor David is focusing on during the series Feel the Heat at Church by the Glades.

Did you know that the people of Jerusalem under the leadership of Nehemiah were able to rebuild the city walls in just 52 days? This is a project that should have taken years, even decades. We were tasked with reading Nehemiah 3 as homework, which details the different families coming together to build the great walls. Not just the carpenters, mind you, but everyone. The goldsmiths, the mayor and the priests all worked together to do God's work.

And of course, there were the haters, which was the particular lesson on Sunday, the nay sayers who tried to tear the people down and attend to their own agenda. When these men sent word to Nehemiah, trying to pull him away, he replied with the following, "I am carrying on a great project and cannot go down." Pastor David spent the entire lesson breaking this sentence down and showing how we can apply it to our lives.

God doesn't want us to do good things, He wants us to do GREAT things. And when those negative people in our lives try to pull us down and take away our focus, we should take the same approach as Nehemiah and tell them to go away. When they sent another request to meet, I particularly liked Nehemiah's response, "Nothing like what you are saying is happening; you are just making it up out of your head."

Pastor David cautioned us to pray for those who are against us, but do not trust them.

I've spoken of it here before, but it has been a while. Our church, in the midst of a recession, is in the process of building a new worship center. A worship center that is costing us $11-13 million. That's $11-13 million being asked of the members of the church to pledge. And you know what? The building is swiftly coming along. I can look out my office windows and see the massive concrete structure that stands like a beacon of hope. A church that is overflowing with people looking for God in a section of the state that's not exactly known for its moral upstanding. If that's not amazing, I just don't know what is.

What's God calling you to do? Pastor David said, if you feel a great deal of excitement, but also like you're going to pee your pants, then you are probably right where God wants you to be.

14 Weeks (A few days late)

2010-10-22T10:57:00.002-04:00

Your Baby: Week 14
Your adorable little fetus is busy with thumb sucking, toe wiggling, and (not so cute but equally amazing) making urine and breathing amniotic fluid as the liver, kidneys and spleen continue to develop. Lanugo (thin, downy hair) is growing all over the body for warmth.

100 Postcards

2010-10-18T09:56:00.001-04:00

Shey's classroom is trying to collect 100 postcards from different areas. If anyone would be interested in helping them out, please shoot me a message and I will send you the address for the school and his teacher's name. I'll be your best friend! (So, yes, Tamara, you have to do it. ha)

Ice Candles

2010-10-17T18:32:00.004-04:00

When I came across the tutorial for Ice Candles, I knew I had to make Halloween ones with the boys for their teachers. I'm not going to go over the whole tutorial again, but here are some photos of the stages. We used two breadcrumb containers I picked up at the Dollar Tree and they worked just fine. I would recommend following the tutorial's instructions for using a taper candle, rather than a wick, as it was a little difficult to get the wick to stay in place. Also, I think I sprayed a little too much cooking spray and we ended up with some gray spots, but it worked out ok for Halloween. The teachers loved them.

Walk on the Water

2010-10-13T14:15:00.000-04:00

by Britt Nicole

You look around
It's staring back at you
Another wave of doubt
Will it pull you under
You wonder

What if I'm overtaken
What if I never make it
What if no one's there?
Will you hear my prayer?

When you take that first step
Into the unknown
You know that he won't let you go

So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more
So don't be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes and you can
Walk on the water too

So get out
And let
Your fear fall to the ground
No time to waste
Don't wait
Don't you turn around and miss out
Everything you were made for
I know you're not sure
So you play it safe
Try to run away

If you take that first step
Into the unknown
He won't let you go

Even when a storm hits
Even when you're broken
Even when your heart is telling you telling you to give up
When your hope is stolen
You can't see where you're going
You don't have to be afraid

So what are you waiting,
What are you waiting for?

So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more
So don't be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes and you can
Walk on the water...
Walk on the water too

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

2010-10-01T10:52:00.002-04:00

Peyton and Shey's elementary offers Tae-Kwon-Do classes once a week after school for an hour. The session runs 6-8 weeks and only costs $35, so I signed both boys up thinking it would be a nice break from their normal aftercare activities. Larry and I have often talked about signing them up for Karate or something similar throughout the years, but it just never seemed to work out. With us working full time and the boys playing sports, on top of homework and just life, there's just not enough time and I refuse to stretch us any thinner than we already are.

One of the reasons I always think about it is the great things I've heard that the kids learn, mainly a focus on respect for others and for self. I'll be honest here, our household is not the most respectful place in the world by a long shot. I'm not really sure where we missed that boat, but sometimes I feel like it has sailed so far away, we will never catch it. Intellectually, I know this is Larry and my responsibility and at 4 in the morning when I wake up and think about things like this, it's never hard to say, ok, we are going to change. We need to work on this. But then 5:30 in the evening rolls around and we've both put in a full day at the office and the boys have been at school, we are all worn out. Dinner is thrown together, homework is done, some relaxation time, then baths and bed. On many nights, it seems we are all in such a state of irritation that it's better we just separate. That way there's no bickering and yelling and pouting and whiiinnnniiinnnggggg. I know it's not ideal, but I justify it by saying we are just trying to make it through and it'll get better.

Tuesday, after Peyton's first practice at the school and an evening of arguing and generally acting like a baby, he pulls out this paper and asks me to sign it. I read it and I had to laugh. At him. I asked him if he had even read it. Did he know what he was asking me to sign? I wish I had brought it with me, so I could write exactly what it said, but the gist of it was based on respect. Peyton was to act respectful, write down his acts of respect and then have me sign it. Um, I don't think so.

So, we read it together and I am ashamed to say that Peyton almost acted clueless as to what he was supposed to do. He had already written on the back that he takes the dog out, which is one of his chores, but not really an act of respect. So, we tried to talk about it some, but by then he was so frustrated and beyond talking too, that we really didn't get anywhere. Every night since, he's asked me to sign and every night, we've discussed it a little more. Last night, he actually listened and seemed to comprehend this act of respect. Lord, give me strength. He was playing with a little science experiment kit he bought and afterwards, he cleaned it up himself. So, this morning, I told him to write that down. We agreed that we would continue to work on it this weekend and then I'd make a decision if I was going to sign his form or not.

I told Larry that it was going to take an incredible amount of patience and self control on our part, but I was done arguing with the boys. I am going to consciously make an effort to think about their questions and once I respond, that will be it. I told Peyton that once I made a decision, I wouldn't discuss it any more and if he continued to, I wouldn't respond and if he kept it up, he would be sent to his room. I just can't take it anymore. I don't know why I just acted like that would grow out of this on their own.

I know it will be hard, but I'm hoping that if we really stick to it, then things will get easier. Once they learn that an answer is THE answer, then hopefully the attitude and carrying on will lesson some. Like I said, Lord, give me strength.

What I've Been Up To Lately . . .

2010-09-29T09:50:00.002-04:00

- Almost going straight through a red light when only the turn signal changed to green.

- Pouring detergent and fabric softener in the washer then walking away before turning it on

- Becoming quite aggravated with a restaurant server when I tried to order a Summer Salad and he had no idea what I was talking about. When we pulled out the menu, it was actually a Strawberry Field Salad

- Specifically going back down the bread aisle to buy hot dog buns when I actually had hamburgers in the cart

- Setting the microwave for 20 minutes instead of the timer (Thankfully, I caught that one quickly)

- Throwing up and simultaneously peeing my pants (Go ahead and laugh, Larry and the boys do)

- Getting a positive pregnancy test and making it to 11 weeks.

- Seeing a quick peek of baby via ultrasound yesterday with a good, fast heart rate.

Something Beautiful

2010-09-23T10:33:00.001-04:00

by Need to Breathe

In your ocean, I'm ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin' on my feet
It's like I know where I need to be
But I can't figure out, yeah I can't figure out

Just how much air I will need to breathe
When your tide rushes over me
There's only one way to figure out
Will ya let me drown, will ya let me drown

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

And the water is risin' quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can't be sure when it will subside
So I won't leave your side, no I can't leave your side

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

In a daydream, I couldn't live like this
I wouldn't stop until I found something beautiful
When I wake up, I know I will have
No, I still won't have what I need

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful (fade out)

How Things Change

2010-09-16T11:20:00.002-04:00

I remember in Junior High, some friends of mine discovered that a holiday named Yom Kippur was coming up. We thought it was a great sounding holiday and so fun to say, so we made signs and hung them up in our lockers celebrating Yom Kippur. I don't remember now if we ever looked up what the holiday really meant. I don't think so.

How funny when 15 or so years later, I met and fell in love with a Jewish man and now I really do "celebrate" Yom Kippur. I put it in quotes as Larry's family are not Orthodox and while practicing Jews use the Day of Atonement for fasting and praying, we just get together with his family and have dinner. Sometimes his parents will go to synagogue and his father may read prayers before dinner. It is very interesting to read about though.

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this. I could make a great revelation about the holiday. How it would do us all good to take a day and reflect. But honestly, I'm really tired and my brain isn't thinking too clearly.

It just struck me this morning as funny. I was leaving the boys' dentist and the lady who checked us out said, "Have a happy holiday this weekend." and I automatically knew what she meant. That's life I guess. Always changing.

Dream

2010-09-09T13:00:00.002-04:00

I know dreams never come across as weird and as real in the retelling, but I had to share the one I had last night.

I was at a police station (I won't even explain how I got there) and looked out the window and saw my friend, Suz, so I went outside to chat. She was very pregnant and lifted up her shirt to show me her belly. It was opaque, like a balloon and I could make out the little hands and feet of the baby and then I noticed something really weird, the baby was dressed. As in had a diaper on and clothes. In her stomach.

When I questioned Suz about it, she nonchalantly replied, "well, yeah, he came out a few weeks early, so I put him back. Once I got the head and one shoulder in, the rest just followed."

I thought for a minute about all the things one would think in that situation and then just walked back into the police station. Apparently, even my dreaming brain couldn't wrap around that one.

A Peace Offering

2010-09-02T11:11:00.003-04:00

After the miscarriage in January, I decided that I wanted to start fresh and find a totally new doctor than the two I had seen during that time. My original doctor, who had delivered both the boys, had really hurt my feelings with his seemingly indifference and dismissive nature and the doctor who found my miscarriage, well, she was a bit abrupt and abrasive and I just really didn't want to go back to that office and the memories it held.

My friend gave me the name of her gyn and I went a bit ago for the annual go around. We were discussing my history, my difficulties in getting pregnant with the boys, the low progesterone in January, etc and she listened and didn't rush me and while she remained professional, she didn't come across as hard. She told me, "You know, it probably wasn't a problem with your progesterone that caused issues with the baby, but rather a problem with the baby that caused your progesterone to remain low." And while I don't really want to think about the baby being defective, per se, it does help ease my mind that there really wasn't anything I could have done. It helps ease the thoughts of if only I would have started taking progesterone supplements right away. And while I always knew there was a Master plan, it does help confirm that that particular little one was better placed in His arms than mine.

My would be due date is a couple of days away and while the sting of the would be memories will always be there, they're a little less sharp now and I know one day when we meet again, our souls will seek each other out and know each other.

Stop and Hear

2010-07-28T15:07:00.002-04:00

Wow! I cannot believe it has been a month since I last wrote a post. Busy, busy, busy is all I can say.

Sunday morning while I was waiting on church to start, I flipped through my Bible just to see where it would land and it opened right to Jonah. Now, I know the story of Jonah, but I've never actually read it for myself. And while I may have know at one time that there are only 4 little chapters, I had since forgotten. With it being so short, I was able to read the whole book before worship started. I really planned after that to write a nice post on it, but as I said before, busy, busy, busy. I do have to say, though briefly, how much it struck me that God saw fit to make those 4 little chapters into their own book titled Jonah and include it in the Bible. How it was so important to tell the story of one man's rebellion against God and the consequences that followed. And eventually, when Jonah followed the instructions given, a whole city was spared. Simply amazing.

On another note, and actually what I was originally going to post before I just had to share my Jonah experience, is that as busy as things are now, I am trying to pause and enjoy the little things. My new (pre-owned) Maxda CX-9 (LOVE IT!) came equipped with a DVD player, so the boys are just enthralled. Every morning, they wear the headphones and watch whatever DVD has been chosen for the week. Shey, my ever creative, musical and entertaining child, loves to sing and will do so even with his headphones on essentially making him tonedeaf. It always makes me smile though to hear his little voice sing along in that strange way people have when they can't hear themselves to the themesongs. "Power Rangers, Power Rangers hmmm hmmm hmmm" I love that boy. It almost makes up for him telling me "You suck" after I said no to Gameworks after we had already seen a movie and gotten popcorn. And yes, he got a swift swat to the behind for that one. Ah kids.

Peace at a Country Concert

2010-06-23T14:56:00.002-04:00

My high school boyfriend, Robert, loved Brooks and Dunn, the country duo. We listened to their music quite a bit and went to two of their concerts during our tenure together. The first concert was in Birmingham and occurred after one of our break-ups and getting back togethers. I remember standing beside Robert, listening to "That Ain't No Way to Go," looking up at him and seeing tears running down his cheeks.

"Lipstick letter 'cross our mirror this morning saying 'Goodbye, Baby', you left without warning. Like a thief in the night, you ran away with my heart."

He told me later that he had been so upset when I broke up with him and that he felt it had come out of nowhere. I can't remember now the exact circumstances of the break up, but I do remember that moment and the love I felt for him in that space and time.

After we broke up for good and Larry and I started dating, I didn't necessarily stay clear of Brooks and Dunn, but I didn't seek them out either. Not sure if it was a subconscious decision, or just because Robert always liked them more than me.

They've played several times in our area and we've never been. I didn't think I knew enough of their songs anymore to warrant the price of admission and Larry never expressed an interest in their music.

We found out recently though that Brooks and Dunn were beginning their last tour and I decided it would be nice to see them one last time. They always did put on a good show. We were going to purchase lawn seats, but a few days before the concert, my boss offered me his seats, which were great. Thirteen rows back and near the end of the row.

Larry and I had a great time. The group still puts on a great, high energy concert and I was surprised that I still know all of their songs. They didn't play "That Ain't No Way to Go," but they did play another oldie that was amazing, "I Believe"

"I raise my hands, bow my head
I'm finding more and more truth in the words written in red
They tell me that there's more to life than just what I can see
Oh I believe"

I could feel the emotion running through the crowd and tears welled up in my eyes.

Sometimes it is incredibly hard to do the things I know I should while living down here, so far from my family and friends that are active church goers. I admit that I don't go every week, but I do make a point to not let too much time pass between services. And I always take the boys, even when they would rather stay home with Larry. My momma always said, "Marry a Christian Man", but I didn't get it. She went to church alone (well, with me) and I didn't realize what a big deal it was. I love Larry and I don't regret marrying him, but I do wish he would go to church with me and be involved.

When "I Believe" was playing though, I felt this sense of peace. A sense that it would work out and eventually, he will come around. All of the sudden, Brooks and Dunn took on a whole new meaning in my memories of life.

I've been listening more lately, with my spiritual ears. Hearing God talk to me through other people, the radio, sermons, and now country songs. There are some changes coming to our household, possibly financial, which I can't talk about yet, and hopefully spiritual too. I'm going to just keep praying and listening.

Friends

2010-06-02T14:12:00.003-04:00

This weekend, my high school graduating class celebrated its 15th year of freedom and can I just say that I feel incredibly blessed. While high school is high school, I can't say that I just hated that time in my life. Of course, classes drug on and on, boyfriends, well a boyfriend, broke my heart several times, and self confidence was not always high, but I had friends. Real friends.

Many of my classmates were together from elementary school, as early as first or second grade and those that came later, joined us in junior high. There were so few of us, that we had to stick together. Some of my best girlfriends were in chorus with me for four years, sharing adventures with Mr. T., trips all over the south and our weekly Sunday night performances. Most of these girls also went to the same church, which included more trips together, youth group fun and hanging out most weekends. These are the girls that I made up crazy stories with, shared intimate details of my life with and leaned on to make it through the school day.

After we graduated, some of us drifted for a while, but with facebook and blogging, we've been able to reconnect over the past five years and I am so grateful. I'm not sure if it is because I don't have any siblings, but there's just something about having friends who have known me for years and years. I loved being able to laugh with them over the crazy things we did in high school. To know that our paths may have woven through life differently, but they still love me for me.

I know any of the women that I spent time with this weekend would drop anything to help me out and I would do the same for them. I love you guys and can't wait to see you again!

PS - Next time, we must take pictures!

And one more Lost observation

2010-05-20T10:01:00.002-04:00

And, here's my other issue/question . . .

It really makes no sense for The Mother and MIB to be the Adam and Eve Skeleton. It is obvious that the smoke monster re-inhabits MIB's body because of the conversation Jacob and he have on the beach as the Black Rock approaches, which occurred long after his body was killed and Jacob laid the two of them to rest in the cave. So, we are to believe that the smoke monster got back into the MIB's body, ran around the island for a while and then laid back down at sometime to become the skeleton?

I think it made much more sense for the skeletons to be Rose and Bernard's bodies after the hydro bomb went off.

Ok, I know there are a ton of other questions that will not be answered and most of them I can live with or have forgotten about, but that break in continuity just really bugs me.

Lost has become Lost

2010-05-19T09:13:00.003-04:00

*Disclaimer: If you don't watch Lost, feel free to leave now.

Many better authors have penned pages upon pages on all the hidden meanings, clues and lessons behind the brilliant show that is Lost, so I will not attempt to add my two cents as I generally just watch the show for enjoyment and then glean any extra tidbits from scouring the Internet. I do, though, have to comment on the last two episodes, "Across the Sea" and "What They Died For."

While "Across the Sea" was informative (some what) and interesting (I guess), I felt it totally broke the stride of the season. In "The Candidate", we lost three beloved characters and then they interject this slow paced, set way back in time, allegory surrounding the myth of the island and the origins of two characters that, while somewhat essential to the overall story, are not the audiences' main focus. If they would have placed this episode near the front of the season, I may have been ok with it, but maybe not.

The more I think about the show starting with season 1 through season 6 as a whole, it seems to be "Lost" itself from the original intentions. I realize that when a creator begins a project that they may have no way of knowing exactly where it should go, but somewhere the stories of the characters were forgotten and instead this game being played between two men that started thousands of years ago became the main focus. And while those who study the show keep touting that the main theme is redemption, that lesson has been set aside as well. It seems the main theme now is protecting this holy light that radiates from the center of the island that we, the audience, just learned about one episode ago. (And yes, it's as weird as it sounds if you continued to read this if you haven't watched a single episode) WTF? (What the Face?! ha ha Modern Family shout out)

I wish the writers would have taken last night's "what They Died For" dropped the sideways story and injected flashbacks of Jacob and the MIB's origin. Then they could have taken the sideways story from last night and paired it with the island story for a new episode. You know, like the characters dealing with the deaths of three people who had been with them since the beginning!?! Or something. It's just really frustrating that with only 3 hours left, the writers throw a sleeper of an episode in there.

Right now, I'm at the point where I'm ready for it to end already. Let's see the big finale and then get on with our lives.

Swing Batter, Batter

2010-05-12T09:55:00.004-04:00

**Edited to Add** Well, we received the email for the team and he didn't make it. It's ok though, I hurriedly printed out invitations for his Birthday and we'll go see Shrek instead. :) Thanks for the well wishes.

Peyton had try outs last night for the All Star team, or as they called it, the "Select Team" ooooohhhhhhhh . . . .

In all honesty though, it was an honor. There are about 125 kids in the league and he was one of 26 or so that were picked to try out for the 12 player team. While he wasn't on the low end of the scale, there were a few kids who were definitely better than him, so I don't think he will make the team. But that's ok. He didn't play last year, so this is really his first year as an older child and he's done unbelievably well. Especially considering we don't get out and practice with him and his coaches aren't the greatest.

It was actually pretty crazy how good a couple of the kids are. One little boy, who goes to school with Peyton and his mom and I are somewhat friends, is just amazing. I would say he's probably even Bandit material. ha ha This little boy, D, hit almost every pitch thrown his way and fielded like nobodies business. But then again, he plays for the City and on a traveling league, so they are at the field 6 to 7 nights a week. That's just insane. I don't know how his mom does it.

What really cracked me up though, was some of the parents, these are even parents that I know, they were almost biting their nails watching their sons try out. Like it was the end of the world if their child didn't get picked to represent our City in this tournament. Maybe it's because Peyton's not so intense about it, that I'm not, but I don't think so. You know, have fun with them, get excited for them, but please remember they are 7 and 8 and this will probably not be their life long career.

So they are going to post the results tomorrow afternoon and we will see. Peyton asked 'what happens if I don't make the team?" I said, "well, you just don't get to play that weekend and we celebrate your birthday instead." And he seemed ok with it. He may be disappointed, but I don't think he'll be too upset over it. We have decided to sign him up for Winter Ball though, which I've been told is a lot more organized and better coached. And he still wants to play soccer, so we are definitely taking this summer off! Momma needs a break.

Muddling Through

2010-05-03T21:10:00.003-04:00

A fellow blogger, Leah (Califmom), lost her husband to cancer a few days ago and it really struck a cord with me. I think about her often, how she is coping, how her kids are fairing, what hell she must be going through. Through her blog and the support of her friends, they took a very vocal stance against cancer and expressed their feelings rather boldly, feelings most of us would like to say, but may not speak aloud.

Whenever she would tweet about her husband, or write a post about him, she always interjected this phase or used the hashmarks. When that tweet came, simply, "he's gone", I immediately sent my condolences. A stranger sending their thoughts and prayers over the expanse of the Internet. I thought for a second about not including her tell-tail hashmark behind it, knowing people that I went to church with follow my tweets, but in the end, I did. #fuckcancer

Words, you think, as a Christian, you aren't supposed to say, but sometimes, they are the only ones that express the frustration and the hatred and the anger you really feel.

I don't know Leah. Couldn't tell you what she believes, or where her heart is, and just reading her blog, just like any other blog, doesn't give you the complete picture. I may have formed an opinion and it may have been dead wrong. Leah posted this recently Snippets in Time and you know, whether or not she believes exactly like I do, I think she nailed it right on the head with her thoughts on God.

Whether or not I admit it here (or even to myself) and I know it's not been near as hard a year as Leah as had, these past few months have been rough. Here is Leah's last paragraph though and a lesson to us all

"If this past year has taught me anything, it is that I can lean hard on my God. He can handle it all. Every priest and pastor who has counseled me along the way has said just that. The error comes in thinking that He cannot, in thinking that we have to shoulder the fear, anger, frustration, and hate ourselves. We don’t. It is not our job. God can even handle the F-bomb. You’d be amazed."

I think it boils down to, even if it is part of God's plan, which we know it all is, sometimes, the f-bomb is all we can use to describe what we are going through and I agree with Leah, I think He can handle it and He may even agree with us.

Flashback Friday - We're having a Baby!

2010-04-16T14:07:00.003-04:00

Six years ago yesterday, I took a pregnancy test at work and confirmed what I already knew, we were pregnant with our second child. I'm sure there is a blog post about it somewhere, back in my Diaryland archives, but work is blocking me from accessing that.

We were trying to have a second child and thankfully, one round of clomid did the trick. Apparently, when I ovulate, Larry and I are actually pretty fertile.

I was so excited to be pregnant again. The pregnancy progressed almost exactly like my first. Morning sickness the first trimester. Large roundness by the end. Extreme largeness. By the last week or two, I was begging my ob to induce me and he took such pity on me, that he booked two hospitals to make sure I got in to at least one of them.

Thinking back on that time, of course, brings about what I now refer to is "all that happened in January." I'm still not sure how to address or talk about that. I still feel at times I am leading a double life, much like Gwyneth Paltrow's character in Sliding Doors. I'll pause and think, right now I should be 15 weeks. Or right now, I wouldn't be drinking this glass of wine or wearing these clothes. Right now, I would be feeling the baby move. A lot of right nows, I would be. But I'm not.

And while I haven't decided against it, I know intellectually, a baby/toddler/child/teenager is really not what we need right now. Life is already so chaotic with school and homework and sports, that I wonder how we would have fit another life into the mix, even though I know we would have found a way. And then there's the ease that is our life right now amidst the chaos. The boys can entertain themselves. They both know how to swim and ride their bikes and now even tie their shoes.

I'm really trying to focus on the boys more and appreciate them. Concentrate on raising them to be good, Godly men. Oh, but when I am out and someone has their baby, I just want to snatch them and inhale the newborn scent. Munch on their cheeks and thighs. Listen to that first giggle and those sweet little baby noises.

The time goes by so fast. Gosh, Shey was such an easy baby. He slept for hours at a time and rarely cried. I remember calling mom and saying, he sleeps so much! What's wrong? and she replied, that's normal. Peyton never slept. Thankfully he does now.

My little entertainer. Man, I love this kid.

And smart, boy is he smart. Not to brag, ok, to brag. He can count to 100, spell all his colors, knows all his ABCs and their sounds, he's picking up sight words, can now ride a bike and tie his shoes. His pre-K teachers say he's ready for second grade, but I think that's a little high. ha ha He's definitely ready for kindergarten though.

So, even though thinking of pregnancy tests and babies right now, is bitter sweet, this is one time I cherish the thought and am thankful for every little minute.

Key West Sunset

2010-04-02T09:17:00.002-04:00

I downloaded The Pioneer Woman's actions for Adobe Elements and had so much fun using them on our photos from Key West. We had a great time just lounging around and walking the streets, shopping, drinking and eating. We were only able to get out on our friend's boat once, but thankfully, the sunset was realy nice that night and I was able to get some great photos.

I will admit that I used the boost action on a lot of these, which will make almost any photo look better. Now I just have to decide where I can hang all these photos.

Bedroom Remodel and Some Random Photos

2010-03-11T18:51:00.009-05:00

I have FINALLY figured out how to really use the macro function on my camera and have been enjoying using it lately.

These are the wild roses that bloom on a random bush we received from Larry's aunt and uncle.

This is one of our cats and this is pretty much what they do ALL DAY LONG. Larry frequently says that he wants to come back as our cats. ha

About a year and a half ago, Larry and I went out and bought grown up furniture for our bedroom and I finally have decided to "remodel" our bedroom in an effort to have one room totally decorated. Here's an overview.

And yes, I need to buy a comforter for the bed, but I've been putting it off. The dark brown "cover" is actually a throw I bought from Wal-mart for the couch, but it was so cold this winter, that it was turned into a makeshift blanket for the bed.

I bought this great vinyl tree from e-bay and then the little frames came from Wal-mart for $1.50. This is the first photo Larry and I took together on my first trip to see him.

I finally replaced the $20.00 lamps I bought at Wal-mart about 12 years ago with these from Home Goods. They look so much better in our room than the glass ones we had before.

This mirror, we got from Larry's uncle a long time ago and I spray painted it a dark brown. It was a gold color and really didn't match, but I always liked it. My mom calls it the Magic Mirror from Snow White. I bought the vinyl words above the bed from Target. Awwww, aren't they sweet and actually a good reminder to never go to bed angry.

And finally, this candle is great! I smelled it first in a local restaurant that Larry and I love and after asking around, I found out they bought it at Publix! You have to get the Cinnamon Buns scent though. It's smells so good without being overly sweet and it's only $9.99.

So there we go, a little upgrade to our bedroom. I really love it though and I'm looking around for a comforter to finish it off.

Help us Moms, Lord

2010-03-04T15:57:00.002-05:00

Mom forwarded me this e-mail devotion and I really liked it, so I'm reproducing it here. The author isLysa TerKeurst

"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:5 (NIV)

I wanted to tap the two girls sitting on the front row at our church service. And fuss at them in a not so gentle way I tell you. But they were five rows ahead of me and my arm couldn't quite reach.

Since I couldn't physically get their attention, I prepared my "look." You know the one that says a thousand corrective statements with just a cross expression and a raised eyebrow? Yes, that one.

The minute one of them stole a glance in my direction, they were going to know exactly how I felt about their wiggling and obvious lack of attention during the service. Oh, and I should mention, these two gir ls belonged to me. Well, at least one of them did. The other was my daughter's friend who sometimes goes to church with us.

I don't think anyone else really noticed them. They weren't being disruptive to other people. But they weren't acting the way I wanted them to. I wanted them sitting up straight, drinking in the message, and taking notes.

Suddenly, an annoying little thought started to tug at the corners of my mind. "You want your children to act perfectly because it makes you look good. Let that go. They don't need to be sitting up straight furiously taking notes to hear God's message. This is a beautiful time for grace."

Ouch.

I don't much like the Holy Spirit speaking the kind of truth to me that hurts. I was in the mood to fuss at somebody. Two somebodies. Give grace? Now? It wasn't what I wanted but it's exactly what I needed to do in that moment. Soon my daughter's friend peered back to look at me. Despite my feelings, I made the c hoice to smile, wink, and give her a little wave.

Then this wiggly, usually not very affectionate, middle schooler got out of her seat. She walked down the aisle, five rows back, and made her way to me. She threw her arms around me and gave me a hug that preached a thousand sermons right then and there.

Indeed, grace was exactly what was needed in that moment. The rest of the service she sat attentive beside me and even asked a few questions on the way home.

And that's what makes this parenting thing so hard. There are really no textbook answers. It's such a moment by moment balancing act between loving, shepherding, disciplining, extending grace, molding, modeling, loving some more and fussing a little along the way too.

The only way I can navigate this balancing act is to stay close to God. Really close. Rather than seeing God as far off, I have to rely on him as a desperate daughter who needs her Daddy.

Philippians 4:6 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

I like that verse but without quoting it in context, it's stripped of its power. The last 4 words of Philippians 4:5 are the power source that unlocks the peace of God that transcends all understanding.

Those four words are, "The Lord is near."

And because He's near, we don't have to be anxious- we can ask our Lord what to do, how to react, when to discipline and when to give grace. James 1:5 reminds me, "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." Only God can prepare me with the wisdom and discernment necessary for each and every parenting moment. So I must stay close to Him- ask Him- rely on Him- cry out to Him- and make Him the basis for my parenting.

My goal should never be to raise kids that make me look good. (But, oh, how my flesh craves this!) My goal should be to ask God moment by moment for wisdom to know how to raise kids who proclaim God's goodness in their hearts.

Blessings to you as you ever so delicately search for that balance between discipline and grace as well.

Dear Lord, I am asking for wisdom today to know how to best raise my kids. Help me to know when to discipline and when to give grace. Help me sense Your nearness so I don't feel so alone and overwhelmed with this task of being a mom. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Flash Back Friday - My Love

2010-02-26T11:04:00.004-05:00

In late February of 1997, AOL was picking up steam and the sounds of, well, the electronic sounds of logging in via dial up were making their way across the country. My roommate and I shared a computer and time on this new fangled Internet or the World Wide Web. I logged in one evening searching for a fun chat room to kill an hour or two. At that time, people actually conversed in chat rooms and it wasn't a scary place that may be featured on Dateline sometime in the near future.

That night, I chose the room Friends First. I had a boyfriend, wasn't necessarily looking to exchange him, but I was keeping my options open. There was a lively discussion going between the 20 or so people in the room and I was quickly swept up in some random conversation or another. Over a bit of time, I was lured into one conversation over all the others between two girls, one with apple something or other in her username, and a guy, Romeo19. As the girls bantered back and forth, a sent a private message to Romeo asking him if he thought they were gay.

I'm don't remember Romeo's exact response, but I do remember that we kept our private conversation going that night and decided on a time to meet up again. Over the next month, e-mails were exchanged, letters were written and many chats were had in a private chat room. The first time we spoke on the phone, we were both taken aback. Romeo spoke very fast, with barely an accent at all. I, on the other hand, had a thick southern twang. We overcame though and talked well into the night, like we had known each other for years.

It wasn't long before I planned on making the drive down the state of Florida to meet with Larry. My roommate was going to come with me and she knew a Miami cop that was going to let us stay with him over the weekend. She backed out though at the last minute, and I was on my own, driving 12 hours south to stay with a man I didn't know in order to meet a man I didn't know.

Looking at that sentence now, it's ridiculously stupid what I did, but I was young, in love and invincible.

I left about 7 o'clock on Friday night and drove through the night. I smoked then and kept myself awake and entertained by having a cigarette every 30 minutes. Whenever I started dosing as I drove, I would pull over and sleep 30 minutes or so at the rest stop. The 700 mile or so trip took me over 13 hours. Then I got lost in Miami.

Thankfully, I had the good sense to pull over and give the Miami cop a call and as luck would have it, his apartment was really close. He met me at the gas station and I followed him back to his house. I didn't have a cell phone then, so I had to call Larry once I arrived and then he had to make the 45 minute drive south to meet me.

We still laugh about our first "date". In an effort of showing me the local culture, we stopped at a little Cuban cafe to have lunch. Hello, Alabama girl here! Larry ordered a Cuban sandwich and in an effort to not gross myself out, I ordered a hot dog. Then I had to eat said hot dog in front of this boy that I had just met.

It was great though and after the first 5 minutes of wow, you're a stranger, we were fine and comfortable and loving each other.

For nine months, we wrote and called and made trips when we could before Larry moved to Alabama for six months to finish out my lease. We both still have all the letters we sent during that time. 13 years. Wow. How time has moved swiftly by.

On a relatively new invention, amidst millions of people, in a random chat room, I met my best friend and my love. Through the ups and downs, the heartaches and laughs, two children, three dogs and two cats and a mean ass bird, we remain us.

Appropriately, on our wedding invitation, we featured the following saying,

Today I marry my best friend,
The one I laugh with, live for, love.

And I think it hold truer today than ever.

Flashback Friday - MamMaw

2010-02-19T10:05:00.002-05:00

In honor ofMaternal Grandmothers, here are some of my memories of my mom's mom or Mammaw.

Games - Mammaw loved to play games. Mom still plays with her now at the nursing home, but she's not as quick as she once was and I think mom lets her win most the time. But when I was a child, we played all sorts of games: Trouble, Sorry, Canasta, a lot of Canasta. When we played Trouble and twos popped up, we always said, Oops, a tootie.

Cornbread Dressing - Like Tamara, Cornbread dressing or dressin' was a staple during the holiday season. My dad has taken over the making of the dressin' now, but he always tells Mammaw, it's not as good as yours.

Comparing our nails - Mammaw and I both have crappy nails and when we could grow them out, we always compared them to see whose were the longest.

When I got older and Mammaw moved into the retirement home, mom and I would go pick her up and make trips to the mall or Wal-mart. We'd laugh and cut up. I remember her telling me one time about kissing her cousin, a girl cousin. And then she just went on with the story like it was no big deal and it probably wasn't, but to me, I was floored. There was an amazement that Mammaw had a life before I was born and she was a teenager at one time too.

I hate that now that I am old enough to appreciate these stories, that Mammaw's not really able to share them with me. Due to her muscle/brain atrophy, she mostly observes and doesn't say much anymore as it's often hard to understand her. She still has a sharp tongue though and if something is bothering her, she will get it out.

Even though these last few years have been a bit hard on my mom, taking care of Mammaw and visiting her in the nursing home, I'm glad they've had this time together and I know mom would agree. It is frustrating though that I couldn't be there as well more than I am.

Who Was and Is and Is to Come

2010-02-16T09:15:00.002-05:00

I've always loved to sing. If there was one thing I could change about myself, it would probably be that I have an awesome, belting voice. When asked what my favorite music is, I don't really give a genre, but rather my answer usually is anything I can sing along with. I've never sang in front of people though and it's only been recently that I will sing in front of the boys. My best singing is in the car by myself with the radio cranked.

When I first started going to Church by the Glades, their music was definitely a big draw. The lights are low, the band is loud and I can sing along with a chorus of over a thousand people lost in the music. It wasn't long after I started attending that I began listening to WAY FM so I could learn the songs quicker. And what began as a learning tool, quickly became my favorite genre.

There are so many heartfelt, uplifting musicians out there that make great music. Music that I know I can play in my car and not worry about my kids hearing. Music that touches my heart and voices my fears and puts into words feelings that sometimes I can't express.

After the miscarriage, I was angry. So angry. Not at God, but almost everyone else. And then I went numb. And I couldn't listen to my favorite music anymore. It just hurt. So when I finally left the house, rock was on my radio. Loud, pulsing noise that I didn't have to think about. For about two weeks, this was all I could stand.

Sunday was the first time I went back to church after the miscarriage. I kept telling myself we were too busy with the soccer and the soccer and the more soccer, but I'm sure a big part of it was a protection mechanism too. I couldn't handle the emotion. Sunday morning, they sang a few songs that I didn't really know, and then we sang Revelation Song by Phillips, Craig and Dean and yeah, I cried through the whole song, but it was ok. I've always loved the phrase, Who Was and Is and Is to Come and that song just goes straight to my soul.

So, I'm starting to feel again, letting a little emotion creep back in, trying to get things back together. Sometimes it hurts and I'm sure it will for a while, but it will get better and the music will help me through it.

Flashback Friday - My First Valentine

2010-02-12T10:50:00.002-05:00

When we were in 4th grade, a new kid started school with us. A little guy by the name of Jonathan Gray. He later became known as J Gray, but that year he was still Jonathan. For some reason, even though I was taller, bigger than most the kids and had a haircut like a boy myself, Jonathan took a shine to me.

It's funny now to think about it. In fourth grade, boys and girls were still kinda scared of each other and I don't remember Jonathan and I talking about him liking me, or "going together" or even hanging out period. However, it never failed, every holiday, he would bring me something and Valentine's was no exception.

If I remember correctly, it was a shiny red heart box of chocolates.

After fourth grade, Jonathan lost his crush and even though we graduated together some 8 years later, I don't remember us ever talking about fourth grade and all my presents.

Yes, I am 12 (+20)

2010-02-11T10:52:00.002-05:00

Taylor Lautner turns 18 today. It is now legal and not quite so dirty feeling to look at that six pack.

Question

2010-02-10T10:22:00.001-05:00

I recently removed the Blogher ads from my side bar. Was anyone using them to access other sites or liked looking at what they had to offer? Just curious.

Pantry Decrapification

2010-02-05T08:56:00.006-05:00

I'm not sure what is going on with me. The only reasoning I can figure is that I am making up for the nesting that was taken away from me and in doing so, I am on an organizing/decorating kick.

I've been reading Thrify Decor Chick for a while now and I love, love, love her decorating. But, most the time I look at a project and either I think I could never do it, or I just don't really have the area for it. However, when I saw her Pantry Decrapification, I thought, I can do that! And I have a pantry! And do it, I did.

We ran up to Home Depot Sunday after Shey's game and bought all the supplies and last night, I finally put it all together.

Here is the before. . .

And while this isn't horrible, there was sooooo much food in there that had expired or was just gross.

Observe . . .

And here is the after . . .

And now when I open my closet, little birdies fly around and angels sing.

One Word

2010-02-02T11:02:00.001-05:00

LOST!!!!!!!

WOO-HOO!

Coming soon, my decrapification (TM Thrifty Decor Chick) of the pantry. I know you can't wait.

Thank you

2010-01-26T10:35:00.001-05:00

Well, this is hard. Instead of going into all the heartbreaking details, I really just want to say a heartfelt thank you. Thank you for your prayers and your thoughts. Thank you for your e-mails and your telephone calls. Thank you for everything. It helped to know I wasn't alone.

What was Happening Tuesday o/k/a Hey! We're Pregnant!

2010-01-14T09:59:00.003-05:00

On Wednesday, December 30, I decided it was time to stop messing around and just take a pregnancy test already. I was having those tell-tell signs in my uterus and my boobs were huge and ow! did they hurt. No sooner did the pee pass that little square box that the first line popped up, even quicker than the control line. We were pregnant again!

After October's heartbreak, I was a little more weary of getting too excited, but it was hard not to since the line came up so fast. Over the next week, I took 3 more tests and they all came up just as quickly. Last Wednesday, I went in to the doctor for the initial blood work to see what my hCG and progesterone levels were. I wasn't too worried because of all the positive home tests, but went ahead with the tests to confirm. My doctor called me on Wednesday and said that my progesterone was really low (a 6 and they like it to be at least 15) and my hCG was 2,200. He said the hCG was low too and put me at 4 weeks 5 days, even though I thought I was about a week ahead. I didn't get too concerned because my progesterone was low with Peyton as well and as far as the hCG goes, everything I read showed such a wide range that I was curious as to how he came up with such an exact date.

So anyway, I was prescribed progesterone supplements and told to go in Friday morning for repeat blood work. I didn't hear anything from the doctor's office until Tuesday morning when the nurse called at 8:45 that morning. Almost verbatim, this is what she said,

"You hCG came back at only 2,800 and since it is so low, Dr. A said this isn't a viable pregnancy. He wants you to go in for an ultrasound today to make sure it's not ectopic. Stop the progesterone and also, you'll need to go in next week for more blood work to make sure your levels are continuing to decrease."

AS you can imagine, my world just crumbled. I shut the door to my office and cried and cried. After I calmed down a bit, I started praying. And I know it's easier to say this now, but somehow I thought everything would be ok. I wouldn't have been surprised if things weren't, but I was really expecting them to be.

Somehow, I made it to the hospital for the ultrasound without going crazy and they were able to get me right in. Larry was there with me just hanging out in the background trying not to get in the way. Because I am so early, they had to do the ultrasound (TMI!) transvaginally, which is AWKWARD and then I'm trying to look sideways at the screen without just craning my neck.

As soon as the nurse got to where she should be I saw a flicker. I felt my heart start to race, but I was trying to maintain control. Then she zoomed in and there was little peanut, looking just like s/he should with their little heart beating away. I squeaked out, is that the heart beat? The tech looked at me and smiled and nodded quickly and then I lost it. Poor Larry wasn't sure what was going on. He said he saw the heartbeat too, but wasn't sure if it was where it was supposed to be and I was bawling, so he moved up to my foot and said, "Is it ok?" The tech nodded towards me, cause you know they aren't supposed to tell you anything and I just nodded too.

The tech told me she couldn't say anything especially in light of my blood work, but she hinted that everything looked fine. She also asked how far along I was and when I said, between 6 and 7 weeks, we're not sure, she said, well, you are measuring 6 weeks 4 days. So that was perfect too. So much for my doctor thinking I was measuring behind.

Obviously, I'm not stopping the progesterone and I'm about done with blood work. My doctor still wants me to go in next week for more, but I haven't decided if I am or not. I know we aren't out of the woods as with all pregnancies, but I am trusting that God is watching over this little one and all will be fine.

I can't thank you guys enough for all your prayers on Tuesday. I love Facebook. Such an amazing way to reach your prayer support on such a quick basis! Please still keep us and Kristin in your prayers!

And because you made it through all that, here are some pics from the holidays. Finally.

Needing a Bigger Bed

2010-01-07T10:12:00.004-05:00

There are so many schools of thought and opinions when it comes to the subject of the "Family Bed." Some people say absolutely not. Some share their bed with their kid for years. I never try to argue with anyone when it comes to the sleeping arrangements of their household. I know what has worked for us and Larry and I are both good with that.

We've always pretty much had an open bed policy. When Peyton was a baby, he slept with us a lot. I would put him to sleep in his crib, but he was a notoriously horrible sleeper and generally in the middle of the night would end up in our bed. When I was pregnant with Shey, I was too tired to fight the bed battle, and he even started out the night in our bed. We eventually moved him to a big boy bed and the nightly visits dwindled dramatically, but then we had another new baby who crept into our bed.

Now that Peyton is older and roughly the size of a grown adult (hello, giant child!), his treks into our bed have all but diminished. He'll still come in sometimes in the early mornings, but it's rare.

Shey though still sneaks in pretty regularly. Thankfully, he has learned to go to Larry's side, so while Shey is becoming a horrible bed buddy, at least I'm not aware of it. Well, until the three of us all end up on my quarter of the bed.

Sometimes though, like early, early this morning, BOTH boys worm their way in and we all fight for a spot to lay.

I know these times are rapidly coming to an end, and while I may bitch about the lack of sleep, I can't help but love the time we are all together. I feel like with Larry and I working full time and the boys being so busy with sports and school, that nighttime, even when we are asleep, is a time we can all reconnect. I hope the boys remember these snuggle sessions with fondness and know that even when their parents are fussing at them, that there was also so much love that we sacrificed our sleep for them. And Lord knows, as well as most my friends and family, how much I LOVE my sleep!

And when they come out with an Emperor size bed, we will be the first in line!

Baby, It's Cold Outside

2010-01-04T10:40:00.003-05:00

It's funny the things you remember and that stick with you over the years. Little inconsequential conversations that play through your mind when certain external forces bring them to the forefront of your thoughts.

One little memory of mine that always surfaces when it is cold outside is from elementary school. I think third or fourth grade during the winter months when we were all bundled up in our warmest coats walking across campus to the high school library. We ran into Mr. T, the chorus and Bible teacher, outside and he was dressed in a thin long sleeve shirt, with a sweater vest, a woolen cap and a cup of coffee. I'm not sure who started the conversation with him, but someone asked, "Aren't you cold?" Mr. T, who always appeared to know everything, told us wisely that as long as your hands, feet, chest and top of your head were warm, that the rest of you would be too. He explained how the heat escaped from these extremities and made you feel colder.

(I wonder if that is how football players stay warm in the sub-zero temps? Their helmets and padding keep their heads and chests warm and most of them wear gloves for their hands. Just looking at their bare arms makes me shiver.)

I wonder why that conversation with a high school teacher on a cold winter day made such an impression on me that I've remembered it all these years? Now I have a hard time remembering what I did last week. ha

We had a great, relaxing holiday season. Not too crazy with no big plans. Actually, the most exciting thing that happened was Peyton finally decided he was ready to learn how to ride his bike and once the decision was made, within 10 minutes, he was off on his own. Turning and stopping and starting, acting like he had been riding for years. It's been so long since he learned something new like that that I had forgotten that Peyton has to make up his mind before he does anything, but once he does, it just comes to him. He caught on so easily that Larry and I just stared, amazed at him. He can be such a great kid. I pray that I show him that on a daily basis even when he is trying my patience to the limit.

I'll try to remember to bring in my camera to work so I can post some pictures tomorrow.

Sheydy Day

2009-12-10T09:15:00.007-05:00

Sunday was Shey's first soccer game and yesterday, he turned five! It's been a big week. If you were ever curious as to what my heart looks like, here he is.

Peyton is my will, but Shey is my heart. Oh that little boy. He has to have one of the sweetest spirits you will ever meet.

We had a big afternoon at a local amusement park area. Playing video games, riding go-carts and a round of mini-golf. Since it was in the afternoon in the middle of the week, we had the place to ourselves.

Did I mention, he's also goofy? Shey's a born entertainer. I'm trying to record him when I can for his apecials on TV once he hits it big.

I love you, baby. Happy Birthday!

Photos

2009-12-02T16:47:00.005-05:00

Not much in a posting mood lately. The holidays are upon us and we are so busy the next few weeks, I'm not even sure when I will get decorations up. Mom just sent me these photos of her when she was a little girl and I thought I would post them. I love looking at old photos of my family.

This one is my mom and her parents with her cousin Anna.

Here is my mom, parents, my great grandparents and um, not sure about the rest. :)